Bitch in the Laundry Room

[theblackajah]

So, I was doing laundry in the laundry room of my apartment bldg. with my boyfriend... we're emptying out some clothes from ONE of the 16 dryers...

Then, this blonde girl in short shorts walks in... and as my boyfriend's unloading the dryer, she goes "Can you get your clothes out of there. The other dryers always break down so I'm going to use that one." to which my boyfriend replies, without being sarcastic or offensive "Oh... I... didn't notice anything different..." and he begins to take the clothes out of the dryer so she can use it. She then begins to walk away while saying "God, if you've lived here as long as I have, you would know better. You haven't lived here long enough and I know they break down. So don't you be telling me that they don't and don't you be answering back to me..." in a really, REALLY holer than thou manner.

This totally PISSED me off.

So, I turn around, and I begin telling her how rude she was, and that she can't start insulting people like that if she's asking for a favour. Then she starts to talk over me defending her case, and so I begin to raise my voice (as I tend to do when arguing). This turns into an all-out argument where she TRIES to insult me by calling my boyfriend... my boyfriend. "Look, your BOYFRIEND was saying that they don't break down... blah blah", so obviously she's a homophobe if she was trying to use being gay as an insult, which annoyed me even more. So, I keep loudly arguing with her, pointing at her (but NEVER laying a finger on her) and arguing with very agressive body language.

Then, my BOYFRIEND, of all people, begins to turn on me, telling me to calm down and just let it go, telling me to get out of her face (note I was at least 2 feet away from her at all times), basically trying to side with her, as is his usual personality because he wants to please everyone and NEVER ever stands up for himself (he'd prefer people walk over him than have a confrontation). So, there I am, defending my boyfriend, and that girl AND my boyfriend blabbering away.

Eventually, I end up calling her a bitch, and the argument keeps going on. And this stupid old man was all like "Hey I've lived here long enough and we try to stay civil here blah blah..." And I pretty much told him that she was the one being uncivil. Just because she wasn't shouting doesn't mean she wasn't being a big a big fat bitch.

So, she starts moving on into insults of "Yeah, you wanna be a bitch like me. Stop doing the whole drag queen thing okay?" "Why don't you just go back to mommy. Oh please, get over yourself." And I continue to insult her back and argue over her. Eventually, she can't think of anything else and just tries to hide away in the other corner while repeatedly saying "Oh get over yourself. G away, leave."

Honestly, an hour later, I'm not really annoyed at her, because she's just a skanky ass ho, so it doesn't really matter. What DID hurt was the fact that my boyfriend turned on me after I was defending him... sometimes. God, sometimes, I wish dumping someone because they're a traitorous wuss were a good, acceptable reason for doing so. Instead, I'm just not talking to him.

So, am I wrong here? Was I wrong to argue? Was my boyfriend right in turning on me? I'd really like to get a second opinion.

 

[theblackajah]

And, by the way, I did confront him afterwards, and the fact that he wouldn't even accede that he was in the least bit wrong to pick that time of all times to turn on me, not even the least of a sorry, pissed me off even more. GRAH. People can be suck fucktarts, even the nicest of boyfriends. Has anyone had a similar experience?

 

[JakeBequette]

It sounds to me like your boyfriend was embarrassed by your screaming at some stranger, even if she was being a bitch. I know I would be if I were in his place, not because you were standing up for me, but because you were screaming at some woman.​

 

[JakeBequette]

Oh, and saying he turned on you is kind of dramatic isn't it? He was probably just trying to get of an embarrassing situation, even if you don't realize that was what he was doing.​

 

[theblackajah]

It sounds to me like your boyfriend was embarrassed by your screaming at some stranger, even if she was being a bitch. I know I would be if I were in his place, not because you were standing up for me, but because you were screaming at some woman.​

Well, first off, I wasn't screaming, actually. I was raising my voice, yes, but I wasn't on the point of shouting or screaming hysterically. And I wasn't raising my voice for no reason. I started out actually very softly and nicely, pointing out that she was rude, then she began gaving me attitude and being a bitch, and at that point did I begin raising my voice.

 

[JakeBequette]

Well, first off, I wasn't screaming, actually. I was raising my voice, yes, but I wasn't on the point of shouting or screaming hysterically. And I wasn't raising my voice for no reason. I started out actually very softly and nicely, pointing out that she was rude, then she began gaving me attitude and being a bitch, and at that point did I begin raising my voice.

Ok, all I have to go on is your original post so I apologize if I was inaccurate.

If your boyfriend was telling you to "get out of her face" though, it would seem that it wasn't just raising your voice....​

 

[theblackajah]

I'm sorry but to keep the arguement escalating was probably not such a great idea. She was rude but you could have just told her and just ignored her. Remember, you live in the same building and chances are you'll run into each other again.
As far as your boyfriend is concerned, sounds to me like he just didn't want the situation to get out of hand. Did you expect him to join you and tag team on her? Or maybe that he would just punch her?

Well, I didn't expect him to necessarily take my side, or even take a side. I definitely did NOT expect him to take HER side though. And honestly... what exactly COUNTS as getting in someone's face? I was about 1.5 feet away from her, and although I was pointing my finger at her, it was nowhere near her face or her body (touching someone would CLEARLY be assault, and that's something I wouldn't do.)

 

[KennyD]

Well, for what it is worth ... it DOES appear that the boyfriend DID take the Bitches side ...
I've got a roomie who just did that with me last evening in fact ... I felt betrayed and hurt ... have not spoken to him since. He came to my room to talk and told him to just leave and go talk to a bitch if he wanted to talk ...

 

[Croynan]

Why does this sound more like it took place in a sand box then a laundry room?

but then again what do i know?

eM.

 

[kotosal]

I would have not argued with a bitch like that.
Obviously it's pretty useless, even if you are right, she thinks that she is right and so on. So, just let it go. You ruin your afternoon and a good day in the laundry rom with your boyfriend.
So, your boyfriend was trying to say that it was not worth it to argue with her, that all the efforts you used to defend your boyfriend were pretty useless with an uncivil rude bitch like that one.

 

[Andreus]

Ahh the age old question, and theone that i constantly get hung up on myself

do you want to be right, or do you want to have peace?

is arguing more really going to stop an arguement?

usually not arguing is the best way to not argue

now if only I could remember that when i get as annoyed as you got I'd be a happy camper.

I know I have a temper and as much as I try to avoid situations that will rile it up, I do live in a real world, and sometimes self controll is all i have. when that fails, theres always the apology to keep the peace, or the avoidance of a location to save face.

those two options suck.

Good luck

 

[gmoney]

Why does this sound more like it took place in a sand box then a laundry room?

but then again what do i know?

eM.

Pretty good analagy, Croynan!

Seriously, I think all your boyfriend wanted was for the altercation to end. You let this woman get the best of your emotions and bring you down to her level. I know it's hard sometimes, but we have to use restraint and tell ourselves, "it's not worth it!" There's no doubt she was wrong and selfish, but what did you accomplish?
Now, go easy on the boyfriend. If you guys can't get past this, then the only one whose not a loser in all this is that nasty selfish woman.

 

[andyspete]

I just have three words to say......."Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"

Take it to the Springer show and just have it out.

 

[gsdx]

Personally, I think you overreacted to the situation. And I don't believe your boyfriend took her side. He sounds like a peace maker/keeper to me and he was stepping in to keep things from becoming physical. In your own words, she was walking away when you pressed the issue. You also said you were 2 feet away from her and jabbing your finger toward her. Two feet is plenty close enough to throw a punch.

You said she was 'obviously homophobic', but it didn't sound like she said anything homophobic except to call your boyfriend 'your boyfriend'. That was a fact, not an insult.

Your boyfriend didn't turn on you, as you said when you confronted him. He intervened to prevent a situation which could have become very serious. He knows when it's better to leave well enough alone.

 

[andyspete]

Personally, I think you overreacted to the situation. And I don't believe your boyfriend took her side. He sounds like a peace maker/keeper to me and he was stepping in to keep things from becoming physical. In your own words, she was walking away when you pressed the issue. You also said you were 2 feet away from her and jabbing your finger toward her. Two feet is plenty close enough to throw a punch.

You said she was 'obviously homophobic', but it didn't sound like she said anything homophobic except to call your boyfriend 'your boyfriend'. That was a fact, not an insult.

Your boyfriend didn't turn on you, as you said when you confronted him. He intervened to prevent a situation which could have become very serious. He knows when it's better to leave well enough alone.

In my previous reply, I was just being silly but in all honesty I have to agree with gsdx 100% here. Why bring yourself to her level by responding to such immature behavior? No offense intended here but next time just take the high road. Nothing good ever comes from bickering. You're not going to change her. She's not going to change you. Just be a bigger person and let it go.

 

[recuerdeme]

It seems overly dramatic.

 

[justsimon]

There's really no point in arguing with someone like that. She seems like the type of person to start drama wherever she goes. The best way to deal with someone like that is to not deal with them at all.

 

[muscleboy82000]

She was a bitch

My suggestion is to just leave it alone. You do not need her to go all mental case on you and start causing problems with the landlord.

 

[looseliam]

Grr. Those people I just call a cunt and then ignore them.

 

[blackbeltninja]

I'm inclined to agree about ignoring her, but then again SOMEONE has to put her in her place at some stage, right? Otherwise she'll carry on doing it. She may well carry on anyway, but maybe not if people keep getting in her face about it.

Having said that... not sure your bf did turn on you, or that she was homophobic... sorry.

-d-