Fluidity79
Slut
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- Feb 25, 2019
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This will be a long post, so I'll put the TLDR CliffNotes upfront: the all-star high school jock, with whom I shared a mutual dislike in those days (while also finding him incredibly sexy), visited my job at a museum a few years back and the interaction was surprisingly warm and friendly. He came back to my work station a couple weeks later and seemingly flirted with me. After which, we followed each other on IG and had several pleasant DMed exchanges. But when I suggested he and I work out together sometime, he ghosted and there were no further interactions between us for a while. Then, he started engaging again and recently initiated another DM exchange. I am curious what to think of this and wonder how best to proceed now that he and I are in contact again?
For those who want more details:
Back in high school, there was a guy that we'll call JC here. He was the all-star jock type, played many sports including track and field, wrestling and football. Boy, did he have the body to prove it. Incredibly muscular build with bulging arms, big round pecs, thunderous thighs, and an ass that wasn't a cake, so much as the entire bakery. Very handsome face to boot, with large almond eyes, sharp cheekbones and plump lips, with a rich deep-copper skin tone that spoke of a black/mixed ethnicity. Most popular guy in school, everyone knew him. I was awkward, arty and ambiguously queer, carving out my own spot in the social hierarchy as there was no preordained spot for me. JC's rank, so clearly at the top. Naturally, we were not friends, although we did have some mutual friends. He and I never had a single conversation, as it could have been socially radioactive for the popular jock to associate with the strange and cerebral queer guy. And yet, he was still so incredibly HOT to me!
I tried hard to be discreet in taking glances at him and thought I was doing a good job. At least until we ended up in a class together senior year. He would wear sleeveless shirts and catch me taking a gander at his brawny arms. I'd look away hurriedly, pretending to be generally looking around and not AT him, but the damage was always already done. I could overhear him talking shit about me ("What a fag!") with his friends. So, for that I didn't like him either--- but still found him incredibly hot. I fantasized about him frequently, despite everything.
Fast-forward 23 years and I spot him and his family and friends in a museum where I worked part-time at a motion simulator. My god, he'd gotten even sexier: a thicc-er build, a bald head (which I have a weakness for) and a salt-and-pepper goatee. Of course, he's wearing a sleeveless shirt to show off those pythons. I wasn't expecting it, but he and his crew came to the simulator for a ride. He smiled brightly at me and said "Hey, how's it going?", extending his hand for a handshake. "JC," he reminded me. I remembered but was just in shock at how friendly he was being. "Of course, I remember you," I replied as I shook his hand. He introduced me to his wife and his then-3 yr old daughter and after some small talk, I helped them pick out a ride. When they were done, he said "Good seeing you!" and hugged me goodbye. Although I didn't think he'd start talking shit upon seeing me as he did decades ago, it was still a much warmer interaction than anything I could have anticipated.
A few weeks later, he visits the museum again, this time with only his daughter. He drops by the ride to say hi and shakes my hand with both hands as I chat with his daughter, who was telling me that the previous experience with the ride had scared her. As I am apologizing and making other ride suggestions to her, JC releases my hand... but gives it a gentle stroke before letting go completely. I am stunned and exerting much effort not to show it. "Did that just happen??", I ask myself as I'm suggesting to his daughter maybe she could try the ride again when she gets a little older and it won't be scary.
As she expressed much skepticism about my suggestion, I had to mentally recap all that just transpired: 1) JC stopped by my department at work, ostensibly just to say hi to me, as his daughter was not a fan of the ride the first time. 2) He really did just shake my hand with both of his hands, gently release the firmness of his grasp and then cradle my hand with one of his, using his other hand to caress the skin on the back of my hand with his fingertips---sending shockwaves all throughout my body---before letting it go. "Oh well, nothing's for everybody, I guess," I said to both JC and his daughter. "Luckily, there's lots of other things to do, so you'll still have fun even if you don't go on the ride," I directed to his daughter, "And I look forward to seeing you again." JC smiled knowingly as he bid adieu. When he was gone, I just sat down, took a deep breath, and pondered every last millisecond of that encounter.
Did he just flirt with me? I think JC flirted with me. Was it all in my head? My brain was spinning, it all seemed so inconceivable. Don't most guys let go immediately after a handshake? Why did he linger the way he did? And what, for the love of god, was with him running his fingers along my hand?? I couldn't wrap my brain around any of it. In the coming weeks, I would eventually quit that job, so JC and I would no longer cross paths there.
I went ahead and followed him on IG and he returned the follow. A little while after, I posted a picture of my niece and I on my IG stories and he replied "Looking good." Again, completely unexpected for him to reach out in any way. "Thanks, you too," I responded. What a pleasant surprise! Shortly after that, he DMs me again, this time to send a photo of me from our prom night with a "Look what I found" message. I was like WOW! I replied with a thank you and asked how he got it since, again, we weren't friends back then, so he couldn't have possibly taken that picture. He explained that the picture appeared on a mutual friend's FB page, which made much more sense. I post that pic on my stories with a tagged shout out to JC for finding it. He even DMed a Happy Birthday greeting! I engaged with his content as well, liking/commenting pics, sending reactions to stories, etc. When I noticed he works out at the gym that I visit as a guest on a relative's account, I got bold. I sent him a DM, first confirming that he works out at that same gym and then suggesting he and I workout sometime. He read, but didn't respond.
I suppose I already knew there was a chance that would happen, but, given our previous interactions up to that point, it seemed like such a harmless suggestion. Fearing I'd made him uncomfortable, I backed away from any further engagement with him on IG. No comments, no likes, no looking at his stories, much less sending reactions. It seemed like I made things awkward and perhaps space and time were the best things I could offer to smooth the situation over. He didn't engage much either in the immediate aftermath and that just seemed to confirm his discomfort. Damn! Me and my big mouth! Oh well, life goes on.
Except, I started noticing him looking at my IG stories again. And I mean, consistently--every one of them. He even liked a story featuring me in a glammed-up outfit I wore to a big-ticket concert in the waning days of this past summer. Just last week, I posted a poll on my IG stories, asking followers if I should go to an upcoming concert by an artist with a reputation for late starts to their shows. He DMed me, saying he was feeling similarly ambivalent about going, especially after having looked up clips of a performance from earlier in the tour and being unimpressed. I responded that, according to friends who attended, the last time the artist played our town, it was a good performance that actually started on time. But, despite that, I told him I was also still on the fence. That was the most recent of our interactions.
There's a sense of relief that he's engaging with me again. I guess I am wondering what, if anything, happens next? Now that he's opened the lines of communication again, do I start engaging more with him? A like here, a comment there, an occasional reaction to a story? Maybe a written response, if I am so moved? I want to try and tread carefully and not throw off the vibe again. But I also still wonder what was behind that flirtatious moment the last time we saw each other, four years ago. What would happen if we crossed paths again? I'd love to know but am unsure of how that would happen, given that he and I don't currently have spaces in common.
So, to recap: a seeming flirtation from a former high school classmate, followed by friendly exchanges on IG, followed by ghosting at the suggestion of working out together, followed by renewed engagement. What do you think of this so far?
For those who want more details:
Back in high school, there was a guy that we'll call JC here. He was the all-star jock type, played many sports including track and field, wrestling and football. Boy, did he have the body to prove it. Incredibly muscular build with bulging arms, big round pecs, thunderous thighs, and an ass that wasn't a cake, so much as the entire bakery. Very handsome face to boot, with large almond eyes, sharp cheekbones and plump lips, with a rich deep-copper skin tone that spoke of a black/mixed ethnicity. Most popular guy in school, everyone knew him. I was awkward, arty and ambiguously queer, carving out my own spot in the social hierarchy as there was no preordained spot for me. JC's rank, so clearly at the top. Naturally, we were not friends, although we did have some mutual friends. He and I never had a single conversation, as it could have been socially radioactive for the popular jock to associate with the strange and cerebral queer guy. And yet, he was still so incredibly HOT to me!
I tried hard to be discreet in taking glances at him and thought I was doing a good job. At least until we ended up in a class together senior year. He would wear sleeveless shirts and catch me taking a gander at his brawny arms. I'd look away hurriedly, pretending to be generally looking around and not AT him, but the damage was always already done. I could overhear him talking shit about me ("What a fag!") with his friends. So, for that I didn't like him either--- but still found him incredibly hot. I fantasized about him frequently, despite everything.
Fast-forward 23 years and I spot him and his family and friends in a museum where I worked part-time at a motion simulator. My god, he'd gotten even sexier: a thicc-er build, a bald head (which I have a weakness for) and a salt-and-pepper goatee. Of course, he's wearing a sleeveless shirt to show off those pythons. I wasn't expecting it, but he and his crew came to the simulator for a ride. He smiled brightly at me and said "Hey, how's it going?", extending his hand for a handshake. "JC," he reminded me. I remembered but was just in shock at how friendly he was being. "Of course, I remember you," I replied as I shook his hand. He introduced me to his wife and his then-3 yr old daughter and after some small talk, I helped them pick out a ride. When they were done, he said "Good seeing you!" and hugged me goodbye. Although I didn't think he'd start talking shit upon seeing me as he did decades ago, it was still a much warmer interaction than anything I could have anticipated.
A few weeks later, he visits the museum again, this time with only his daughter. He drops by the ride to say hi and shakes my hand with both hands as I chat with his daughter, who was telling me that the previous experience with the ride had scared her. As I am apologizing and making other ride suggestions to her, JC releases my hand... but gives it a gentle stroke before letting go completely. I am stunned and exerting much effort not to show it. "Did that just happen??", I ask myself as I'm suggesting to his daughter maybe she could try the ride again when she gets a little older and it won't be scary.
As she expressed much skepticism about my suggestion, I had to mentally recap all that just transpired: 1) JC stopped by my department at work, ostensibly just to say hi to me, as his daughter was not a fan of the ride the first time. 2) He really did just shake my hand with both of his hands, gently release the firmness of his grasp and then cradle my hand with one of his, using his other hand to caress the skin on the back of my hand with his fingertips---sending shockwaves all throughout my body---before letting it go. "Oh well, nothing's for everybody, I guess," I said to both JC and his daughter. "Luckily, there's lots of other things to do, so you'll still have fun even if you don't go on the ride," I directed to his daughter, "And I look forward to seeing you again." JC smiled knowingly as he bid adieu. When he was gone, I just sat down, took a deep breath, and pondered every last millisecond of that encounter.
Did he just flirt with me? I think JC flirted with me. Was it all in my head? My brain was spinning, it all seemed so inconceivable. Don't most guys let go immediately after a handshake? Why did he linger the way he did? And what, for the love of god, was with him running his fingers along my hand?? I couldn't wrap my brain around any of it. In the coming weeks, I would eventually quit that job, so JC and I would no longer cross paths there.
I went ahead and followed him on IG and he returned the follow. A little while after, I posted a picture of my niece and I on my IG stories and he replied "Looking good." Again, completely unexpected for him to reach out in any way. "Thanks, you too," I responded. What a pleasant surprise! Shortly after that, he DMs me again, this time to send a photo of me from our prom night with a "Look what I found" message. I was like WOW! I replied with a thank you and asked how he got it since, again, we weren't friends back then, so he couldn't have possibly taken that picture. He explained that the picture appeared on a mutual friend's FB page, which made much more sense. I post that pic on my stories with a tagged shout out to JC for finding it. He even DMed a Happy Birthday greeting! I engaged with his content as well, liking/commenting pics, sending reactions to stories, etc. When I noticed he works out at the gym that I visit as a guest on a relative's account, I got bold. I sent him a DM, first confirming that he works out at that same gym and then suggesting he and I workout sometime. He read, but didn't respond.
I suppose I already knew there was a chance that would happen, but, given our previous interactions up to that point, it seemed like such a harmless suggestion. Fearing I'd made him uncomfortable, I backed away from any further engagement with him on IG. No comments, no likes, no looking at his stories, much less sending reactions. It seemed like I made things awkward and perhaps space and time were the best things I could offer to smooth the situation over. He didn't engage much either in the immediate aftermath and that just seemed to confirm his discomfort. Damn! Me and my big mouth! Oh well, life goes on.
Except, I started noticing him looking at my IG stories again. And I mean, consistently--every one of them. He even liked a story featuring me in a glammed-up outfit I wore to a big-ticket concert in the waning days of this past summer. Just last week, I posted a poll on my IG stories, asking followers if I should go to an upcoming concert by an artist with a reputation for late starts to their shows. He DMed me, saying he was feeling similarly ambivalent about going, especially after having looked up clips of a performance from earlier in the tour and being unimpressed. I responded that, according to friends who attended, the last time the artist played our town, it was a good performance that actually started on time. But, despite that, I told him I was also still on the fence. That was the most recent of our interactions.
There's a sense of relief that he's engaging with me again. I guess I am wondering what, if anything, happens next? Now that he's opened the lines of communication again, do I start engaging more with him? A like here, a comment there, an occasional reaction to a story? Maybe a written response, if I am so moved? I want to try and tread carefully and not throw off the vibe again. But I also still wonder what was behind that flirtatious moment the last time we saw each other, four years ago. What would happen if we crossed paths again? I'd love to know but am unsure of how that would happen, given that he and I don't currently have spaces in common.
So, to recap: a seeming flirtation from a former high school classmate, followed by friendly exchanges on IG, followed by ghosting at the suggestion of working out together, followed by renewed engagement. What do you think of this so far?
