It’s important to establish a relationship through legal documents, if you are in committed relationship. I’ve known cases where a person has been left homeless when the partner died and the partner’s family put him out on the street. A friend of mine died two weeks ago and his daughter is challenging the will that leaves most of his assets to his male spouse. I also know people who were excluded from their partners’ side at the hospital, and even from their funeral, because they were not legally related.
I live in Connecticut where civil unions give gay couple all the rights and responsibilities of marriage available under state law. However those rights are not recognized by any federal agency and are not available when you are out of the state.
My husband and I have been together many years, have a joint bank account and own a house together. The lawyers I know, recommend that even with a civil union and a church wedding, we should have wills, durable powers of attorney for finances, health care proxies, living wills and other documents to ensure that we get as many of the rights of legal spouses as possible.
We have substantial IRA portfolios and we are each other’s beneficiaries. Both our families (parents, siblings, children, grandchildren, etc.) love and support us, and our relationship. However, we know that the smell of money can change people and we need to make sure we are both protected if the other were incapacitated or died.
Wanting to take care of the person you love is romantic, even when it involves lawyers and legal documents.
