I think i'm driving myself crazy

[Ichigofang16]

I have a bro ( younger buddy of mine) that I think or rather know i have a bi crush on. I still don't know if hes bi as well or if hes just really comfortable with his sexuality but the not knowing is driving me insane. We rough house alot but he also like cuddles up on me alot. At work we are always together, and we've been talking in unison and other things. I don't think i have enough experience to really know whats going on but people at work have taken notice of our closeness and have made comments but they dont suspect we more than bros. I think the things that throw me the most is that he says things under his breath gay/pervy things and ill hiss them back but we dont' go anywhere with them. IDK anyone think they can explain my situation to me?

 

[borg69unimatrix]

Sounds like he's really comfortable with you in your bromance, which is awesome ! I'm going to guess though that given your attraction to men, you're misreading those signals as more sexual than platonic affection. ... at least that seems to be how it usually goes. Gay/bi guy crushing on the straight friend.

...but it's pretty hard to diagnose anything with one small paragraph from one biased wishful thinking perspective. Maybe he is curious and into you too?

There is no magic crystal ball. If you want to know what he's thinking, you'll have to either ask him, or keep playing the flirty games and see which one of you gets the balls to make the first move.

You pretty much have 3 options: leave things as is, which is vague, driving you crazy and kind of what you want, or say/do something that either leads to more, or it could freak him out and you lose him.

 

[Ichigofang16]

K maybe some of the major strange things I can't sort out will help:
Hes kissed me on the forehead before--hes taller than me by like 5 inches.
hugs alot and usually tries to choke me but i think this is to hide the fact that hes holding me close.
sits on my lap, I sit on his
plays with my hair and I play with his
his weakness is tickling and it crazy cute how he looses it when i do that to him.
I sat on his lap tonight and I felt something warm beneath me, I tried to get up but he held me in place for a bit and jokingly said "turq bitch"
he sat on my lap before hand and we joked about busting a nut, I had papers in my lap and when he got up they were damn, i joked that he jizzed and he looked alittle nervous till he figured it out it was the wet ball in his hand. the list goes on

 

[bruce379]

Dare him to go to a gay bar and make a move or if he attempts to make any sexual moves that he usually does either grab his crotch or pull him close and grind close to him. Usually that would instigate a lip lock (kiss). Much better if both of you had a few rounds and dare him to a dance, then kiss him and grab his crotch. It would even be fun to dare him to go up to a cute guy and dance with him or secretly use a gay guy to hit on him (who's gonna know )
Let your imagination run wild. Then update us on what happened.
The two of you can get away with a lot of stuff once you're there and the environment will be a safe place to be playful. The trick is getting him to agree on the dare to go to a gay bar. "I wanna see you go inside a gay bar and hit on a young gay guy hahaha. If you can do that, I'll give you $100 to buy drinks in there!" or "I dare you for $50 to go next to that guy and put your hand on his ass and feel him up, you can tell him it's a dare haha" -- It'll get dirtier every minute. or "Hey, you drunk yet? Let's dance like all the other dudes here. Looks fun." The more 'active' the dance floor the better.
Be careful though, if there are straight girls there, they are so attracted to self-declared 'straight' guys. I remember having fun with 3 straight girls on the dance floor once.
Good luck! Chances are, your hand would be inside his crotch jacking him off on the dance floor while making out. It's gonna be wild if you can pull off the dare. I can sense that he's game.
Tell us how it went or how you went down on him

 

[Ichigofang16]

1. hes too young
2. I'm bi and he is either bi or a very open str8 that is very clear
3.I'm a wild child but I never been to a gay club and i don't know of any in my area

 

[sixthson]

Does he know you are not straight? The two of you are having foreplay not a bromance.

 

[Ichigofang16]

I dont know, we rebound alot we kinda go from cuddley and playful to Alpha male and Beta--flirting with girls, running around being bosses. You won't really suspect anything unless we got too carried away.

 

[sixthson]

If that's the game you wish to play, it's your choice. Enjoy your frustration.

 

[jensu846]

watch porn together sometime. that should get things started. always worked with me and my buds.

 

[journo25]

K maybe some of the major strange things I can't sort out will help:
Hes kissed me on the forehead before--hes taller than me by like 5 inches.
hugs alot and usually tries to choke me but i think this is to hide the fact that hes holding me close.
sits on my lap, I sit on his
plays with my hair and I play with his
his weakness is tickling and it crazy cute how he looses it when i do that to him.

OK, this is more than you crushing on a "straight" guy. Invite him over for a few beers, and have some gay porn playing. See how he reacts. If he's been kissing you, hugging, playing with your hair and sitting in your lap, as you describe, the combination of beer, porn and privacy (which you don't get at work or wouldn't in a gay bar) ought to elicit the desired response. If it doesn't, then he may be a cock tease who enjoys flirting with you in places where things can't get out of hand. You'll either have to advance it by starting the conversation, or settle for the physical stuff that happens on his terms.

 

[palbert]

1. hes too young
2. I'm bi and he is either bi or a very open str8 that is very clear
3.I'm a wild child but I never been to a gay club and i don't know of any in my area

If he's too young to go to a bar he may be too young, even if he is gay. Make sure he's "of age."

 

[seven2go]

I don't think I'd throw gay porn at him off the bat........easing into some bi porn would be more like it.......

 

[Singularity]

This is more than just a bromance, I don't go that far with female friends of mine because it throws them off and makes things weird, especially when I'm their type.

I'd say that because he's so young and because his environment hasn't corrupted him yet to think bad about closeness between two men he might be just exploring his boundaries on an subconscious level.

The only way to break the last boundaries is to set things straight (or gay in your case).

 

[mobley]

I suggest you don't succumb to the suggestions previously mentioned. Intentionally or unintensionally, none of them truly have you or your friend's feelings in mind. Consider, instead, that your friend is trying to explore and understand his own sexuality. If you really like and respect him you'll not force the issue. Just take it as it comes. If it happens, it happens. If not, then you've maintained your friendship and your self respect. If the proper opportunity arises you may want to bring it up in conversation. Just be careful. You don't want to freak him out. Be a friend.

 

[Ichigofang16]

Thanks guys this really helped settle me down alittle

 

[Ichigofang16]

Though one more thing I text him some times nothing flirty or another just normal convos and he bearly ever responds, which drives me insane and he knows that --petpeeve of mine is being ignored, but he always reads them and answers them when we're face to face. I questioned him about this and he claims he never knows what to say. Any ideas on that?

 

[sumyungguy]

Though one more thing I text him some times nothing flirty or another just normal convos and he bearly ever responds, which drives me insane and he knows that --petpeeve of mine is being ignored, but he always reads them and answers them when we're face to face. I questioned him about this and he claims he never knows what to say. Any ideas on that?

Seems like he's genuinely not sure of what to make of the situation. I wouldn't force it any further though. He's young. Let him come to you if he wants that sort of thing. Don't force it like mobley mentioned. If you do you WILL scare him away and you'll lose a friend.