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Is he curious?

S

SunshineState11

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I have a "straight" friend that I met at a gym and we became good friends. Not long after we met he seemed to start flirting with me, he even started calling me "boo". He would stare at me and smile and I would catch him looking at me out of the corner of my eye. One day he invited me over to his apartment, when I got there I met his girlfriend. After a few minutes things felt awkward so I got up to leave but he followed me outside and stayed outside flirting and talking to me for almost an hour. He then started telling me to stop by and he would sit in my car with me for an hour at the time, just talking and laughing. One day he approached me and told me that he wanted to break up with his girlfriend and went on to tell me how they do not have sex, and that he doesn't like her touching on him and keeping tabs on hi. 24/7 and he wanted to know how to tell her. I told him that she deserved the truth. After the conversations he went to get out and he said "now that I'm single don't think you're going to get my ass" I smiled and said no I would rather have your front than your back and I rubbed his chest and he smiled from ear to ear so I rubbed his chest again, I then asked him if I had done something wrong and he said "No, not at all" and he hugged me and got out of the car. Not long after that he started making sexual jokes, started commenting on my ass, asking me which hand I use to pleasure myself with etc. I finally confronted him one day and he said "You know I love women but toot it up" whatever that's supposed to mean, lol. Later he started making jokes about his penis and how big it was and that if I saw it, it would ruin my life etc. etc. so one night I rubbed his chest and turned to run and he grabbed my ass and made a joke about how big it was, fast forward, 4 months later he sent me a picture of himself in nothing but underwear and I joked and told him I would buy him a gift If he showed me his penis then a couple days ago he sent me a picture of him sitting on the toilet and his penis and testicles were partially exposed, he sent a couple this way. He said that if I bought the gift that he was show me in person, he even told me that he would give me an hour long strip show and he would get completely naked if I paid for the show, Now I am totally confused, he swears he is straight but his actions say something totally different. I don't doubt that he likes women really but I do doubt the fact that he claims to be 100% straight. Am I crazy? Is this dude bisexual and in the closet or just a dude with a big ego. (he's built like a spartan) lol.
 
I don't think he's totally straight. he may be curious or one of those guys that gets off on the compliments gay guys give him. how important is the friendship to you? there's many threads in this forum with similar stories and a lot of them didnt end well. they play out with the "straight" guy experimenting then flipping out and dumping the gay friend or the gay friend makes a move and the straight guy shoots him down and ends the friendship. the part about buying him a gift for a strip show just sounds creepy to me tbh. I wouldn't do it. I'm sure others will say "go for it" but it sounds desperate to me. find a gay guy that's actually interested in being a friend or boyfriend and doesn't play mind games with you. this guy doesn't sound like a friend or boyfriend material.

Steven
 
It's complicated, when we are alone he flirts and acts as if we are "together" talking about things we are going to do etc. he tells me that I can never leave him, that I have to always be in his life. I already told him that I had feelings for him and he said "You know I love women, but toot it up" gave me the impression that he loves women but would sleep with a guy. He goes above and beyond with the flirting when it's just me and him together. He sends snapchats of his body and his private parts constantly. Honestly I have developed feelings and I told him that I think it's best that we go out separate ways but when I do he always gets mad and blocks me on social media and on his phone but that never lasts long we always end up talking again after a couple of days. And about the strip show, it was a joke. He made the comment that he wanted to start stripping for parties and I said just stay here and strip for me and he said ok but you have to pay me or buy me a gift just like the females would. I would never do it because for one I have feelings and seeing him dance around naked, all over me would only makes those feelings deeper. I know I should cut ties but I do love him as a friend but I don't know if I can be just friends with someone that I love.
 
you left a fair amount out of your op. In my response I said there were a lot of threads like this and with new details there are even more threads like this and in many cases they end with the person in your position getting hurt. he's most likely unsure of his sexuality and you're the person he feels comfortable flirting with. he's found someone he can dip his toes in the water with and not worry about being outed etc. I'd distance myself from him. it's only going to end up hurting more when he finds another gf. you've expressed your feelings. he's said he's straight and I highly doubt he's going to express feelings for you. he's enjoying the attention you're giving him. he may even eventually experiment with a guy but it's highly likely it'll be a one or two timer at best. if it's with you, you're going to cling on to the hope for more and it's probably not going to happen. move on. he'll eventually get the idea and leave you alone. the sooner you end this the better. it's going to suck and hurt but you'll find someone that will reciprocate your feelings.

Steven
 
Thanks Steven, I know what I need to do but my feelings are blocking me. I guess I will do it when I have had enough, and yes I did leave a few things out because there's so much that has happened that I could not even begin to type it all. Thanks for your advice, really appreciate it!
 
you're welcome. I hope I didn't come across as lecturing or anything like that. I've seen this play out so many times and I truly don't want to see you hurt. I understand it's fun having someone like him giving you attention and sending nude pics etc. I'd like it too. I hope you're able to end it and him leave you alone. Feel free to pm me if you want to talk more. I'm a good listener lol

best regards

Steven
 
No, No I didn't take it as a lecture.. I know in my heart that I need to cut it off, because honestly I have already cried about this twice, but I keep going back, I keep hanging out, I keep putting my heart on the line hoping for a different response but all I get is sexual jokes, and naked pictures. I know I will never get what I am looking for.
 
Share his pciture :D Maybe he doesn't know how to feel about your realtionship and maube he is testing it.
 
It's tough because sexually, when a guy that looks like that (a muscle hunk) gives you attention for giving him attention, it's hot.

Take care of yourself.
 
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