Just got disowned by my parents

[MrRochesterNY]

I think that advice postings that go on too long tend to degenerate into nonsense, squabbling, and negativity. Early on, the OP got some good, sympathetic advice, with only an occasional reply that missed the mark. Now, after eighty responses, he is getting a mixture of humor, snarkiness, and argumentation, plus a couple of pointless replies from JUBers who rarely make any sense. The OP seems to have his head on his shoulders and knows what his best course of action now is.

Isn't it time to close this thread?

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

You regularly have a go at Telstra, so I woudnt be staying on that high horse for too long.

 

[Cormac135]

I think that advice postings that go on too long tend to degenerate into nonsense, squabbling, and negativity. Early on, the OP got some good, sympathetic advice, with only an occasional reply that missed the mark. Now, after eighty responses, he is getting a mixture of humor, snarkiness, and argumentation, plus a couple of pointless replies from JUBers who rarely make any sense. The OP seems to have his head on his shoulders and knows what his best course of action now is.

Isn't it time to close this thread?

Apart from one poster who i think nailed it on the head i don't think zombie has gotten what he really wanted out of this thread.

Early doors yet though.

 

[sixthson]

Oh, dear! I'm crestfallen by this turn of events. Just the thought of poor Zombie sleeping under a bridge in the frigid Midwest while his bf is in Rome masturbating in public with some hot Italians is enough to make even online personalities weep.
But I'm a generous guy, I own a bridge. Just saying.

 

[pat grimshaw]

... i don't think zombie has gotten what he really wanted out of this thread....

What do you think zombie really wanted by revealing his private life in this thread?

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

I think that advice postings that go on too long tend to degenerate into nonsense, squabbling, and negativity. Early on, the OP got some good, sympathetic advice, with only an occasional reply that missed the mark. Now, after eighty responses, he is getting a mixture of humor, snarkiness, and argumentation, plus a couple of pointless replies from JUBers who rarely make any sense. The OP seems to have his head on his shoulders and knows what his best course of action now is.

wells no news a eons buts
-parent <jut a word_
wike wot a word
@as a planet earth up sec show
ans fa next glop a spawns a wittulls Hapes ons a go
_gurd wuck_

back a adults doisn above

"were dolfin?"
hehehehe anoda ting

tinku

 

[zombiekiller]

What do you think zombie really wanted by revealing his private life in this thread?

No particular thought in mind. Just thought I'd share. If people don't want this thread to remain open, by all means close it. Wouldn't want to hurt some delicate feelings here.

 

[pat grimshaw]

No particular thought in mind. Just thought I'd share. If people don't want this thread to remain open, by all means close it. Wouldn't want to hurt some delicate feelings here.

No, I like your self-revelatory threads. And I like how you initiate more threads than some of the rusty, complaining JUBbers.

 

[thewiz]

She might want to read Pope Francis and the catechism. Neither says anything about disowning; they also both call for love of the person but disagree on actions.

Fortunately I'm ordained in the National Catholic Church of North America which embraces both.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

She might want to read Pope Francis and the catechism. Neither says anything about disowning; they also both call for love of the person but disagree on actions.

Fortunately I'm ordained in the National Catholic Church of North America which embraces both.

ya tink vampires gets joins?
-blood a god ans stuff_
yea maybes french cause

anyway

tinku

 

[zombiekiller]

No, I like your self-revelatory threads. And I like how you initiate more threads than some of the rusty, complaining JUBbers.

Haha oh my goodness you are so good at getting just under my skin to provoke a reaction but not enough to make it obvious to others that you're pushing my buttons.

Years of practice?

 

[Alistair]

So why was your mother so easily allowed to snoop thru your house? My mother has a set of keys in case of an emergency, or if my alarm system is going off and I'm not around. She sat with my cat while I was on vacation but she won't even open the refrigerator to see what we have to eat.

 

[zombiekiller]

So why was your mother so easily allowed to snoop thru your house? My mother has a set of keys in case of an emergency, or if my alarm system is going off and I'm not around. She sat with my cat while I was on vacation but she won't even open the refrigerator to see what we have to eat.

I gave her my key when I moved to the new house.

Regarding the snooping around thing, I tried to explain to her before about privacy. I sort of gave up trying to get her to understand. Again, I don't expect you to understand my culture.

 

[Alistair]

Well we all do understand your culture. You've explained it to us enough. My suggest would be a heavy duty wall safe to keep your personal papers in, and any sex toys you might want to hide while you're away.

Also would be a good idea that if your mom can find them so can a burglar

 

[Kahaih]

I gave her my key when I moved to the new house.

Regarding the snooping around thing, I tried to explain to her before about privacy. I sort of gave up trying to get her to understand. Again, I don't expect you to understand my culture.

What about your partner's wishes/expectations?

You are putting your mother ahead of him.

Your relationship, if it ever was one, is done if you don't get your priorities sorted – now.


Tell your mother, point blank, that if she can't respect your partner and/or your partner's culture, she can fuck right the hell off.

 

[Kabluey]

...You are putting your mother ahead of him...

I assume that's what she demands, with the threat of what she's just done as the consequence for not giving her her way.

She's now played her hand and will be scrabbling to regain the upper hand.

Ignore her to de-power her.

 

[frankfrank]

Like I said, if I lose my job, lose my house, and end up under a bridge, what are the chances of someone here taking me in until I get back on my feet?

Probably at least somewhat better than your mother taking you back, or helping in any way.

I've helped some people here with "real" money (yeah I know that's NOT the same as "taking somebody in"), and I know some other people here who have as well.

Few or none of us know you any farther than what you post here, and we don't even know your first name (do we?). It may indeed be unlikely that one of us would take you in, not knowing you much at all - and I'm guessing you don't interact via PM or offline with many of us - but is that much different from walking over to Boystown to ask strangers randomly whether they'll take you in?

If, essentially, you NO LONGER EXIST "in her eyes" anymore, change the locks on your house...and never again give her the key. Perhaps a spare key would be in a safe-deposit box, should something happen to you. ASK HER IF SHE WANTS YOU TO COME TO HER PLACE AND SNOOP THROUGH HER JEWELRY, HER UNDERWEAR DRAWER, ETC.

You are letting her have power over your life.

 

[sixthson]

I suspect in Zombie's Asian culture, much like Italian or Jewish, the mother feels her child is always her child no matter what age and it is her right to know everything. If the OP had only been honest with her about exactly who the bf really is, she might not have been on so many fact finding trips through his drawers?

 

[palm2013]

I suspect in Zombie's Asian culture, much like Italian or Jewish, the mother feels her child is always her child no matter what age and it is her right to know everything. If the OP had only been honest with her about exactly who the bf really is, she might not have been on so many fact finding trips through his drawers?

Asian parents want to know everything about the child because they care about the child & want to keep him in the right track (in life). Unfortunately, Asians have a negative view about homosexuals (abnormal sexual preference). I believe his mother suspected the true relationship between him & his partner. That could be the reason she went through his stuff (to convince her suspicious thought).

 

[Kahaih]

I suspect in Zombie's Asian culture, much like Italian or Jewish, the mother feels her child is always her child no matter what age and it is her right to know everything. If the OP had only been honest with her about exactly who the bf really is, she might not have been on so many fact finding trips through his drawers?

If there is any truth to this, then it is perfectly good reason for those who respect adulthood/independence, and who respect the privacy of others, to not date anyone from those cultures – without any accusations/criticisms of racism.

And respecting/understanding other cultures goes both ways. She knew that she was invading the home/privacy of someone from a different culture – regardless of the nature of the [supposedly 50/50] relationship. There is no excusing her behaviour.

And, too, none of what has been presented can excuse his use of 'my key' or 'my house'.

I'm not as content as some of you seem to be to ignore the partner's place in this scenario. It's his house, his space, too.

I suppose when all is said and done, it's best that his partner find out how much of a momma's boy he really is – sooner rather than latter.




BTW: I was thinking that there were past stories/brags of the parents assimilating into American culture. Guess I remembered incorrectly.