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just venting, airing out, talking shit, personal beefs, problems, anger management, and etc thread

  • Thread starter Thread starter refujiunderground
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I'll say...lol

You should see me when I fuck up a recipe. :dead:

That's because you're trying to stir what's in the bowl AND jerk off at the same time.
tumblr_ln3sk6hK5v1qzrs75.gif
 
You used an icepick to check the cake?

<hugs RJ>

Everybody has to start somewhere. You made a beginner's mistake. Be patient with yourself, RJ, beginners always make mistakes. Once, when I first started out, I placed a hot glass bowl on cold marble. The glass bowl shattered into a bunch of pieces.

Cooking can get very frustrating when things don't go just right.

well, my mom was using it to check the cake, she told me to use it so i used it. *shrugs* she was upset because i put like 8 holes in the cake trying to see if it was ready or not.

and yes, indeed, cooking can get really frustrating. i will never forget when 9 years ago, i was trying to make gravy and somehow, i burnt it to a crisp. :dead: don't ask me how i did it but within 10 minutes, it went from light brown water to burnt shit. i was really trying to get my chef boyrdee on, determined to make some nice gravy to pour over the chicken and rice dinner that my mom made and it came out to be something else. :( still don't know how to make gravy.
 
You put a hole in the cake? Big fucking deal - that's what icing is for. To cover up the mistakes. :)

And I prefer hand lotion over Vaseline. Easier to clean up. :)

Lex
 
*shrugs* she was upset because i put like 8 holes in the cake trying to see if it was ready or not.

As a graduate of the Aunt Jemima School of Pancakery, I can tell you that the proper way to test a cake for doneness is to find the center, or highest point of the cake, then stick your testing implement into the cake at that precise point. Then pull it out. The test is complete. No second jabs.

If the tester comes out reasonably clean, the cake is done. If it comes out with traces of raw dough clinging to it, the cake is not done and needs to go back in the oven for more baking and a repeat test.

Try to do this when you are not feeling horny, because the suggestivness of all this poking and cling-testing may drive you over the edge. And it could be very painful to poke your private tester into a hot cake loaf.
 
As a graduate of the Aunt Jemima School of Pancakery, I can tell you that the proper way to test a cake for doneness is to find the center, or highest point of the cake, then stick your testing implement into the cake at that precise point. Then pull it out. The test is complete. No second jabs.

If the tester comes out reasonably clean, the cake is done. If it comes out with traces of raw dough clinging to it, the cake is not done and needs to go back in the oven for more baking and a repeat test.

Try to do this when you are not feeling horny, because the suggestivness of all this poking and cling-testing may drive you over the edge. And it could be very painful to poke your private tester into a hot cake loaf.

how did you know i was poking the cake up in a hurry to make sure they were done so i can run off to masturbate? i was going to jerk off while the cakes was in the oven but actually got kind of scared that i might have got carried away.

thanks for the advice. i most definitely won't do that again with the cake, cornbread or whatever is going to be baked. the damage is done though. how could anybody tell though? its rum cakes which they're pretty much look semi burnt. my mom could tell whoever she's giving the cake too that the holes are decorations.

You put a hole in the cake? Big fucking deal - that's what icing is for. To cover up the mistakes. :)

And I prefer hand lotion over Vaseline. Easier to clean up. :)

Lex

naw, it's rum cake. icing doesn't go well with it.

no disrespect to my mom, i love you mom please don't call me, but she can't make good tasting icing for shit.
 
how did you know i was poking the cake up in a hurry to make sure they were done so i can run off to masturbate? i was going to jerk off while the cakes was in the oven but actually got kind of scared that i might have got carried away.

Because it's the only activity on your schedule, as far as we can ascertain? :) And if it's the only thing on your schedule, why the rush?

Lex
 
Because it's the only activity on your schedule, as far as we can ascertain? :) And if it's the only thing on your schedule, why the rush?

Lex

well, it was until i had to go all the way to watchung to pay my mom's kohls bill and do cardio at the gym.

another thing too that's bugging me out. i LOVE doing cardio but damn, i'm losing weight. i checked my weight earlier this afternoon and i weigh 141 pounds. :dead: i was 150 about 2 months ago. i'm somewhat muscular BUT skinny now. i was trying to feel my ass last night to see if it had meat on it like how it was over the summer because i like having meat on my ass. i felt it and the meat has gone. :cry: the meat was gone. i don't want to have a skinny ass again. would hate it let's say if i decided to have sex and the guy that i was with was felt my ass and was like "damn, is that your bones?" shit, i would love to have some padding back there so it won't hurt when i'm getting thursted with a dick. i'm preparing for my first time whenever that happens even though i have nobody to fuck and don't see myself start to fuck anytime soon.

but i love doing cardio though so cardio trumps having a meaty ass.
 
I'd gladly give you some ass.* God knows I've got enough to spare.

Lex

* - as it were. Or even not as it were.
 
Figjam, the penultimate photo he posted featured a kitty, and a puppy looking up at the camera with a woe-be-gone expression on his face--at a food market in Asia.

It wrenches my heart out.

I understand - but those tend to be delicious when prepared just right.
 
Here ya go Lexxy - Have at it!

6a00d834515e5769e201310fb99075970c-800wi

Um, that's a Hostess Fruit Pie. Two problems with that.

1. It's not lemon curd. The consistency of the "fruit filling" is something along the lines of the "slime" they used to sell to us kids back in the day. It'd make a horrible lubricant for masturbation.

2. It's a fucking Hostess Fruit Pie. Those are now out-of-print and rare, and thus should be saved for a special occasion. To be eaten, not used sexually.

lemon1.jpg


...THIS is lemon curd. Much better consistency. :)

Lex
 
something you can never do with figs

disgusting fruits they tend to be,

lousy even in a Newton with all

that sugar.
 
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