My Roommate Keeps Touching Himself In Front Of Me!!!

[curboi321]

I just moved into a new place a few weeks ago and one of my roommates who will call "Eric" has really hit it off with me. We hangout often, laugh, and talk about our life stories and seem to get along very well. I've tried to ignore that fact that he's attractive and I've immediately put it out of my mind since he's my roommate and I don't want anything to happen to make things awkward between us.

The thing is Eric CONSTANTLY touches himself in front of me, sometimes on the outside of his pants, sometimes just to rearrange himself, and sometimes he just reaches down his shorts and goes to town like it's nothing. I want to believe that he just "itches" down there, but last night me, him, and his gf were watching a movie together. Me and Eric were sitting on the couch together and his gf was lying on another. When he sat down beside me everything was cool at first, then he leaned back started.. just a couple tugs, then a few adjustments, then he stuck his hand down his jogging pants and started going up and down. I looked forward the whole time since I knew his gf was beside him who was trying not to look at the same time

I'm convinced that he doesn't even realize that he's doing it since right after he came out his pants he touched me to tell me something, then he petted my dog who was on my lap at the time. I'm trying not to engage in anything with my roommate (esp since he has a gf), but the next time he's going to town down there I'm contemplating on calling him out on it at least to see if he's aware of it and just doesn't care or if he doesn't even realize he's doing it. I don't want to make him uncomfortable around me and no he doesn't know I'm interested in guys (I think) but if he keeps doing it I feel like I'm going to have to say something. My question is should I leave it alone or say something to him about it?

 

[Sebazz]

If you found him unattractive, wouldn't you say something? Speak up or soon they're gonna have sex in front of you

 

[lambdaboy]

I live In London. A lot a real lot of young straight guys 17 to 22 live in sweat pants and one hand is always down groping themselves. In some case since the majority here are uncut I wonder if they showered lol. It is easy to notice when the hand comes out the cock is hard or semi hard.

 

[dukemike]

I don't know what it all means, but I find this subject most interesting. Please let us know what if anything develops out of this situation.

 

[sixthson]

Admit it....you just want to be the one touching his junk.

 

[ElmosToe]

I smell rotting fish.

If you found him unattractive, wouldn't you say something? Speak up or soon they're gonna have sex in front of you

How is that a bad thing?

Admit it....you just want to be the one touching his junk.

^ this .


Look dude, if his hand down his pants is your biggest issue here, you definitely do not want me as your roomie then.

All kidding aside though, seriously, pull your head out of your ass and grow some balls.
If you find him hot, have some level of interest in dudes, just enjoy it for what it is.

He is just being himself around you, you should feel honored. He feels comfy enough with his girl and with you to do what he would normally do by himself in front of you. Take some comfort in that, know that it means he feels he can trust you and you are not going to freak out, be disgusted or god forbid start hitting on him.
(this is your rhetorical CLUE, btw)

My suggestion would be to start joining in and start doing it as well. wear some trackies, sweats or boxers around the house and start scratching your nuts when you get the urge. Maybe start farting around him as well.


Either one of two things will happen.
He will see you as a filthy pig, realize how disgusting he is being himself and stop doing it.
Or he may suggest to have some "guy time" when his chick is not around that will most likely involve alcohol and porn....Should I elaborate on where that will go or do you have enough of a brain to take a guess?

This is coming from a dude who has had a full lifetime of countless encounters with "straight" buddies and roommates, hell I could write volumes on this subject.



my questions to you:
are you the romantic type?
aside from finding him attractive, are you looking to hopefully have some sort of romantic relationship with this dude if were at all possible?
Or would you just be satisfied with a JO bud?

Not being mean here, just blunt and honest.

 

[rareboy]

I would be flattered that he feels that comfortable to do it.

 

[bergentony]

I would put on some porn when the two of you are home alone. Let him start touching himself and you do the same. If he wants more it'll happen then. If not at least you rubbed one out.

 

[Kyanimal]

Everyone should be free to be that comfortable with themselves, especially in their living space, and that includes You. Uptight societal restrictions should be left outside the door.

If he is that at ease, and his (visiting) gf isn't objecting, why is it bothering you? In the privacy of your home, unless there are unwanted advances, Live and Let Live! Where else can anyone completely relax if not in their own place? At least grant yourselves that for your own well being.

I've lived with many different roomies. Some were extremely private/prudish while others were far more casual. I respected their limits, or lack thereof, and expected the same from them. That's what goes with Sharing space.

Perhaps you should take some clues from him, and take advantage to be more chill away from the outside world. Where else can you simply let go if not in your own crib?

 

[alphacentauri]

If it bothers you, tell him.

If it doesn't, just ignore him.

 

[Boodeedood]

In a casual manner say, "That thing must be pretty big to have to be re-adjusted all the time." That way you call him out in an easy going way. Plus, he may see it as a opportunity to show it to you. If he pulls it out in front of you, I'm pretty sure you got the green light.

 

[curboi321]

We've been getting closer over the past week, nothing serious just hanging out more and getting to know each other better. He's drawn back on touching himself often though he still does it sometimes, but now he keeps initiating hugs with me. We both are busy during the day but when we come home we shoot the shit a little and then "bro hug" it out. I think he's just trying to be a good friend and get to know one another which I want to.

There are a few vibes he gives off which are slightly homophobic like when he says dancing a certain way "seems gay" or even staring down at your own penis is kinda gay Though he digs in his pants in front of other guys??? Idk, I do want to keep things cordial between us and hopefully not have one "drunken night incident" that can make things awkward between us. I do like having him as a friend of course since he's my roommate but also to have good comradery between us. I'll keep you updated if anything else happens.

 

[Boodeedood]

I'm not a psychiatrist, but it almost sounds like he's trying to fight his attraction to guys. You'd think he'd consider the little hugs more "gay" than a dance or looking at your own dong.
Don't rule out the drunk night thing. I don't think us guys are too prone to the after party regrets, might be the encouragement he needs.
If you guys are bro hugging, try initiating a playful little wrestling match when it's just the two of you. Lots of hand and body contact. That should be a good chance to see what's on his mind. Words are one thing, but the body never lies. If he gets hard....

 

[Benvolio]

He may suspect you are gay and do these things to test you, not because he is willing to play, but just to see how you will react.

 

[bergentony]

Let him accidentally walk in on you jerking off to some porn. Use straight porn and just watch the guy lol. If he joins in see where up it goes

 

[spooky]

Sounds like crabs... enjoy!

 

[mcbrion]

You did say, "a real lot of young straight guys 17 to 22 live in sweat pants and one hand is always down groping themselves." And you're both in London, not America. Customs and habits are different there, including how younger guys behave. Americans tend to filter everything thru their own culture. American's not my culture, so while I get why posters are assuming this, I'd also remember they "do things differently over there."
So, if this is the norm (the touching their junk thing), why is this unusual to you if so many guys do it? Is it simply because you are attracted to him, or are you saying it's NOT the norm, because I'm not getting why, if so many guys there live in sweats and "adjust" themselves (and I assume they do it in front of other guys they assume are straight, so they're not expecting that there's a cam (or human eyes) out there recording their every gesture)), it's different in your household. Is he the first roommate you've ever lived with and you're not used to it, or have you lived with other guys and they didn't do it?

Besides which, he appears not to be just doing it in front of you: he's also doing it in plain sight of his girlfriend, so I wouldn't think (not that you do: you're just wondering) it was designed to get my attention necessarily. Maybe he's doing it to get hers. And the fact that he does it when she's there, as well as when she's not there sounds to me like he just does it without thinking about it. I mean, is it considered "rude" to do this among younger guys, or just among certain classes of guys (I'm sure you wouldn't catch Prince Harry doing it - oh wait, he's already gone starkers, hasn't he??). So, is it a class thing maybe?

And I don't think the "bro hug" thing is anything to look at. As a Black man, I see White guys doing that all the time, and it has nothing to do with them having gay feelings. It's just imitating how brothers greet each other: it's a way of showing you're "cool." Everybody does it. It's just how you show another guy, "I like you, man, you're cool with me." I get why other gay guys haven't noticed that this happens among straight guys a lot. I see it all the time in my gym when the high school lets out and the gym floods with 17 year olds. It's a standard greeting, and that's all it is. That's why it's called a "BRO" hug: because it's cool to imitate Black urban culture. I sure wouldn't read anything into that. Even the gay men I know who are mainly interested in other gay Black men do the "bro hug" as a matter of course. It's respectful if you are supposed to be friends with the guy. To NOT do it, once you've established some level of friendship is almost an insult if you ignore it.

What else ya got? Sounds like he's cool with you and is glad to have someone to be close to. How is he with the other guys in the flat? Does he "bro hug" them, too?

 

[curboi321]

It happened again last night.. we were sitting on the couch watching a movie and my roommate was leaned upright against the coffee table drinking a beer at first. Then he "got comfortable" and layed back beside me... all the while his girlfriend was sleep on the chair beside him with her back turned. Out of nowhere he did it.. he looked over at my crotch! Like directly at it but then played in off like he was looking at my dog lying on the ground beside me. Then he just couldn't help himself, he reached into his pants, and started adjusting himself. It was only after he was done and took his hand out that I noticed he had his pants unzipped. I should have reciprocated but I was shocked that he made it so obvious and as I said before I don't want to fool around with my roommate and make things awkward between us but I can feel like he's subtly pressing it. If I had to guess I could see something happening soon even if it's just both of us playing with ourselves together I would be okay with "mutual bonding" as long as it doesn't escalate into something more.. we'll see what happens and I'll keep you updated if you want to know.

 

[Telstra]

Is his gf living there as well?
If no, i guess she is in the way and too crowded.

 

[IceColdLover]

If he feels comfortable with it, go ahead. I don't condone cheating, but at least just jack him off til he cums, no giving head or anything more.