Sexual Frustration

[jayamsterdam]

I am so frustrated!!!

I've posted on here before about a boy I liked.
Long story short, he came out to me after we became close friends and hung out for an entire year...he then gave me a blow job and started crying after because he realized he was truly gay and didn't want to be. We then kept hanging out and finally he got comfortable enough with me to have sex. It was amazing. He said he was glad it finally happened because he had been feeling "sexual tension" for a year.
He then went out of the country on a 2 week vacation and is now back, but hasn't seen me yet (okay, its only been a day since hes been back..but I haven't seen him in 5 weeks now).
I am so fucking horny. I don't wanna have random sex with strangers (I did that in my pre-coming out days), I just want to have sex with him..like...RIGHT NOW.

I'm ashamed to say I've only done random hookups and every now and then met a great guy who I'd hook up with on the regular for a year or so but then we just stop talking. This guy is the first guy I have something in common with, whom I hung out with for a year BEFORE having sex with.

So, I guess I am confused - do guys lose interest after having sex? Is this why I haven't seen him? Or am I just so frustrated that I need to chill??

I'm interested to hear what you all have to say!

 

[Benvolio]

I would give him a call now. Don't push too hard. Many gays go through a period when they are beginng to realize they are gay but don't want to give up the idea of a wife and children and picket fence. BUT HE IS HORNY TOO.

 

[Seasoned]

In addition to missing the sex did you also miss him? He's had a break with new experiences while you stayed home waiting for him to return. He needs some reentry time especially if he used his time away to think things out.

Let us know how it goes for the two of you once you see each other.

 

[evanrick]

so hes only been back for a day and you are posting here that 24 hours is an eternity? i think you must love him to feel this way.

 

[jayamsterdam]

so hes only been back for a day and you are posting here that 24 hours is an eternity? i think you must love him to feel this way.

OMG...evanrick - I have NEVER felt this way about a boy before. I mean, look at this way - its the first guy I met who I GOT to KNOW for an entire year before we messed around. We were always flirting, there was always sexual tension, and BAM, it finally happened. I actually INVESTED in a man rather than just have a one night stand. He means a lot to me...do I love him? I could say yes, if this is what love is SUPPOSED to feel like, then yes I do.
But we did have lunch today - YAY! - just got back from having a nice meal with him. He was a lot more relaxed than ever (there used to be that awkward sexual tension every time we hung out) and it was nice.
I am very happy with him and hoping we can continue to grow!

 

[Seasoned]

Good luck. Try to just live in the moment and that will not only allow you to be fully present and enjoy each day, it will also help you accept whatever becomes of your relationship. The nice thing about your writing about this guy is that i can imagine your smile when you think about him. It seems your relationship is very nice and very normal. Good luck.

 

[jayamsterdam]

Okay, things have been going well. We continue to chat online for a long time (2 to 3 hours) at least three to four times a night and we've hung out a few times. We had sex the other day (everything but anal...he's not ready for that), and I am lucky enough to be the first guy to make out with him.
BUUT, I made a mistake - well, I guess I was being honest. He asked me if I had other "friends w/ benefits" and I reluctantly told him yes. It isn't so much that I have friends with benefits, because I haven't done anything with them in a good 3 to 4 months, but that I do not like having friends w/ benefits because it lowers my self-esteem, but I didn't want to tell him no because I didn't want to scare him off and make him think I was trying to be exclusive with him (although I would def. welcome the idea).
So I dunno what I did here, I hope I didn't make myself look like a slut. He is so new to everything, that I don't want him to think going the stereotypical slut route is healthy.