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Why do I always fall for the straight guys?

LostVegas

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Hey everbody!
I'm new here, 22 years-old from Germany and I live in Sweden. I can't stop wondering why I keep falling for straight guys? I know I'm gay but I haven't had any serious experiences yet. The Problem is probably that I am not the least bit interested in gay guys. At least not the ones that I met. I always end up with a crush on a straight guy (having a girlfriend...)
Are there any gay guys who are not like total soft fruitcakes?:wave:


I understand your plight somewhat....but I do believe you could have stated it in a much better way without insulting anybody....You have to be very foolish to think that there are no "guy guys" that are gay...and even though I dont have a preference for effeminiate guys, there are plenty who do....so I think you are kind of being naive to what being a gay guy actually is. VEGAS
 
Hey easy man!
Maybe you are right about my unfortunate and therefore offending choice of words lets delete "fruitcake", i looked it up in the dictionary and in german it does not have a bad connotation as it obviously has in the english language.
So I apologize to everybody who felt insulted - wasn't my intention.
Now but maybe somebody can tell me now what a gay guy actually is?:D


This is why I hate labels so much! :grrr: They seem to paint a picture that stereotypes people and hence everyone must fit into a box otherwise, it's abnormal.

But I can assure you, that is just wrong.

A gay guy can be anyone - they can be girlish, they can be flamboyant, they can be loud, they can be macho, fat, skinny, short, tall, black, white, and the list goes on and on and on.

A straight guy can be the same too. Some are short, some are tall, some are loud and some are girlish!

The only difference is who they are sexually atracted and who they would have sex with!!!

That's why it is sometimes very hard to tell if a person is straight or gay!

Just take your time and I'm sure you'll get to know more guys and I can assure you that you will one day meet a guy who you would be totally surprised to find out that he is indeed gay!
 
merokali, you're far from alone in being attracted to straight guys. It can happen to gay guys of any age. I'd say that in your case, it may have something to do with your lack of experience, but it could just be because there are a lot of hot straight guys out there!

I agree with confusedboy23 and mrsock, you need to meet some more gay guys and get to know them. You don't have to have sex with them if they don't turn you on! But at least get out there and make friends, and learn a little more about the variety of gay people there are in the world.

And don't worry about your language here, you're among friends. Just say what you think, we can handle it.
 
I'm extremely masculine but very well groomed. I say dude alot and lift weights like a mutha fucka. I drink, party, and rock out to loud metal music. I'm bi but hey I've had a gay guy fall for me when I had a gf.

All you can do is accept he either said no, two he doesn't know yet and you need to tell him how you feel, or wait.

Best combination usually turns out in a compromise.;)
 
I am attracted to gay guys. I am attracted to straight guys. I am attracted to charming guys, no matter if they are gays or straights.

U definitely not alone in falling for straight guys, coz I have been in that boat before too. However, u need to wake up and fall for the guys who can fall in love back with you.

You know - as said - the greatest gift is to love and be loved in return.

Straight guys don't love back.
 
Unfortunately I have the same habbit. I don't know what it is but I have not met a single gay guy who I think is any great shakes. I hate to say it but at my college the only gay guys one saw carried damn ladies handbags and dressed like some show birds. It's alright to do it if you want to but for some reason it seems to be never said that the effeminatization of gay guys causes a lot of problems, the least of which is the image that gay guys get. I attened a LGBT meeting at our college and ALL that happened was the guys there (therewas only one girl) talked about this chic's hair and that singer's accessorizing. If I sound alienated, I am!

No girl or gay guy grew up dreaming of one of the guys on Queen Eye coming to sweep them from under their feet! I'm only speculating but I fear that it's only in growing up in a gay world where there seem to be so few middle-of-the-road masculine men that we learn to settle for and eventually call love what we have with our effeminate boyfriends. How can a world where 90% are bottoms be a stable one?

Obviously one only sets oneself up for getting hurt by falling for a straight guy. But for as it long as it takes for my prince and his prince (moi!) to hook up, I guess I'll keep falling for the straight princes!
 
I've found getting to know more gay men has done a lot for reducing the number of crushes I've had on straight guys. Honestly, I don't even worry about crushing on straight guys any more because I have many other crush prospects.

As soilwork says, join a gay group of some sort that does sports, hiking, cooking or whatever. You'll KNOW all the guys you meet there are gay (or at least gay friendly enough to not get offended if they're hit on) and won't need to rely on stereotypical behavior to set off your gaydar.
 
Same problem here. 8 out of 10 of the guys I like is straight.. It depresses me... I always get over it, some of them become friends, but... It's frustrating...
 
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