30 year old gay male and I have never had sex or a relationship

[Benvolio]

You have heard of sex, "use it or lose it." The reverse is true, that if you often have sex, including masturbation, you keep yourself aroused and horny. I suggest that you stop masturbation for a week or two and try to think of sex less. I believe you will find that the need for sex will abate without drastic action.

 

[sadbastard620]

I'm so frustrated I'd like to join the Westboro Baptist Church. Who knows? Maybe they'd accept me?

 

[DoctorTwink]

Seriously.

You need to spend some time with a counsellor who can help you unwind the issues in your life.

Just reading your posts, there is way more going on than I think even you know....have you ever consulted a mental health professional?

Please do this. There is no need to get castrated.

Also getting out and meeting people just to be friends, make friends, or have a social outlet helps a lot too. Good luck.

 

[KaraBulut]

I'm so frustrated I'd like to join the Westboro Baptist Church. Who knows? Maybe they'd accept me?

Let's take a moment here to consider the proposals...

Several members have suggested working with a therapist.

You've proposed castration and joining Westboro Baptist Church.

Which of these seems to be the choice that is most likely to improve your situation... that is, assuming that you want to get better?

 

[jdcnow]

Just reading your posts, there is way more going on than I think even you know....have you ever consulted a mental health professional?

This. This right here!

Mike, I can tell you - I'm 31, single (in your exact same boat, to be quite honest!). Down through the years, I have suffered from severe, almost suicidal depression, with one actual suicide attempt (April 13th, 2010) that was thankfully unsuccessful. I have a history steeped in abuse and mistreatment, both sexual and otherwise. I come from a small, desolate country town completely devoid of opportunity and growth. Hell, I was once told by my own mother that she thought I would never amount to anything.

You'd think the deck would be stacked against me. And you'd be right. Except for where I got an opportunity to move away to the city. Now, I'll admit that was pure luck. But the rest...the rest was all me: I'm working two jobs, one of which is an 80-hour a week job every other week. I've gotten longstanding medical issues fixed - foot surgery last year, and eye surgery 3 weeks ago.

I've gotten professional help! I see a psychiatrist once a month, a licensed therapist once a week, and I'm on the anti-depressant medication Wellbutrin - all of which have done me a world of good. It has not been easy to deal with my extensive psychiatric damage. But OMG, has it been worth it. I don't think I'd still be here, if I didn't take it upon myself to get some professional help.

And I'm in college, in school pursuing my dreams. I'm doing far more than I ever thought I could. And yes, I do look forward to the day when I take a good man to be by my side.

But I know that none of this would have been possible without me willfully putting forth the effort needed to make all of these things happen.

It is often said something along the lines of, how too many people let Opportunity pass them by, because instead of being dressed in Men's Wearhouse and carrying a briefcase, he instead shows up in Dickies overalls, with a shovel in his hand, ready to work.

Making your life better simply isn't going to fall out of the sky. Like others have posted - you have to want to get better bad enough to willfully put forth the effort into actually making "better" happen.

 

[sadbastard620]

Can a moderator please remove delete this thread? I'm humiliated by it. Please?

 

[palbert]

So far you've posted your humiliation in 3 of YOUR threads. What gives.

 

[rareboy]

Can a moderator please remove delete this thread? I'm humiliated by it. Please?

As has been pointed out, you are asking for deletion of all your threads because you are 'humiliated' by them.

Nonsense. You posed an hypothesis and people responded with their opinions and personal experiences.


If JCDNow can post such an honest and moving account of his own self-discovery and realization of his own self-worth as result of doing all the heavy lifting...you can bear up to the rest of the comments that others are making.

Now suck it up and either engage in the discussion you started or walk away and let the thread die once everyone realizes it is only so much sterile ground.

As for you...seriously. You don't need therapeutic assistance....you deserve it in order to give yourself a chance at living as a happy homo guy. So don't waste time. Start looking for someone to help you out of the prison you have built for yourself.

 

[mikemizanin729]

Why do you have to make your life so difficult..???

 

[sadbastard620]

I just realized I used this username for other things not related to the threads I started. If people who live around me find these threads, I'll be in danger. Please delete all of my threads and ban me. I am looking over my shoulder when I go outside.

 

[KaraBulut]

I think I'm done humiliating myself.

Perhaps.

Before I close this thread, it's worth noting that when you posted about your situation, you received several consistent types of responses - for the most part, you received support, advice to seek professional help and some very personal stories from other members who have had their own struggles.

Perhaps one day, those sincere efforts will be of value.... if not to you, then to the many others who read these forums but never have the courage to post.