A Chance To Get Back At My Ex

[Danugh]

I dated this guy in 2000. I am over him (clearly); but i just met someone who can unbeknownst to him, help me to get back at my ex.


I met his closeted brother in an online chartroom. I mean what are the odds. He is 18 now 19 in November.


I hadn't seen him in years and he changed really manned up and looking good. He met me once while i was dating his brother, not sure if he would remember me. I realized who he was from conversation.

But i don't know how to play it out to really stick it to my ex. You see my ex doesn't know his brother is gay (well bisexual).


So any ideas on how to proceed?


The brother is hot so i'm sure i can eventually grow to like him but right now i need to find a way to use these interesting turn of events to stick it to my ex.

 

[G-Lexington]

Ask him if he has $20.

Lex

 

[Danugh]

Ask him if he has $20.

Lex

I am reporting this, very immature Lex. I am disappointed in you.

 

[hubbellgardner]

^

 

[crzyrazn]

Honestly, What is the point of you getting back at him? I don't understand why anyone would have anything more to do with an ex after the relationship is spent and done. Don't consume anymore of your time thinking of ways to get back at this person. Move on. And don't use his closeted brother as a means to get back at him, that is just wrong.

 

[Just_Believe18]

Ask him if he has $20.

JB18

 

[hubbellgardner]

^ now thats just funny, right there !

 

[Danugh]

Honestly, What is the point of you getting back at him? I don't understand why anyone would have anything more to do with an ex after the relationship is spent and done. Don't consume anymore of your time thinking of ways to get back at this person. Move on. And don't use his closeted brother as a means to get back at him, that is just wrong.

But he did me wrong. isn't it karma that i met his brother years later?

This seems like a prime opportunity.

I wouldnt consider it using him because he is hot and i guess if he wasnt his brother i would date him. Who knows. But he is his brother.


So something has to be done. He needs to pay for what he did to me.


What better way to stick it to him than...

 

[pacz]

Just remember, what goes around, comes around. Karma is not about getting revenge.

 

[Corny]

I dated this guy in 2000. I am over him (clearly); but i just met someone who can unbeknownst to him, help me to get back at my ex.
.

if you need to get back at him, you're clearly NOT over him.

 

[Circe Infuria]

So any ideas on how to proceed?

Yes.

Abandon the idea of revenge and get on with your life....as you claim you have done, but in reality, you haven't.

Giving your ex any kind of attention at this point only proves that you are giving him power over you.

Revenge is a waste of time. There's too many other people in this world for you to be concentrating on...leave your ex in the dust and keep moving forward.

 

[M4P]

Revenge isn't all its cracked up to be. I say be the better man and just move on

 

[JackFTwist]

so you would hurt some innocent kid to get revenge on someone else who you claim you are over for a broken relationship from 7 years ago

if you actually try and do this I pray that your dick will be as lame as you are being

and ask him if he has $20.

 

[crzyrazn]

But he did me wrong. isn't it karma that i met his brother years later?

This seems like a prime opportunity.

I wouldnt consider it using him because he is hot and i guess if he wasnt his brother i would date him. Who knows. But he is his brother.


So something has to be done. He needs to pay for what he did to me.


What better way to stick it to him than...

I consider it beneath me to give any thought to someone who treated me wrong. Leave him and his brother be. Concentrate on other more important things. You're the only one who is hurting you thinking about it.

 

[G-Lexington]

I am reporting this, very immature Lex. I am disappointed in you.

Indeed, very immature. My apologies.

I spend a fair chunk of my JUB time here in CO/R. I'm not a therapist, but I'd like to think I'm a good listener. And, as one friend calls me, I'm a "forest detector" - I point it out as every one else stares at the trees. Sometimes I bring a different perspective on things. And, believe it or not, I care. I've been in tough spots before, including a crippling depression that left me in despair for months. So I have an inkling what some people are going through. When they feel helpless, like there's no way out, and there's no one to turn to. I try to reach out to them - give them comfort, advice and an open ear/eye. And do my best to help them through it all, and hopefully get to a better place.

But apparently, there are more pressing issues at hand. So let me put the suicide prevention hotline on hold for a bit while we dip into the CO/R mailbag.

Dear Lex,

Seven years ago, I dated this guy. I'm clearly over him - it's amazing I remember who he is even. But I've recently run into his brother. He's hot, naturally, or I wouldn't have mentioned him. Clearly, this is karma, and I'm meant to use the brother and his closeted status to get back at my original boyfriend (who I'm clearly over). However, I am unclear how to proceed. Any advice would be appreciated.

Straight Converter

Dear SC,

Thank you for writing. Even if I were to somehow get myself in a position to believe your story, I still think you have some things wrong. Karma is, by definition, an action which inevitably brings about repercussions, positive or negative, either in this life or the next. This doesn't fit the scenario. You dated this guy seven years ago (and presumably, you dumped him - nobody would dump you, surely), and now...here's his brother? How would that be karmic? His brother hasn't done anything.

But semantics aside, the fact remains that you wish to use the brother - almost certainly in a way that will hurt him deeply - in an attempt to get back at a former lover (that you're clearly over). Frankly, I can't think of anything. But I wouldn't fret. You're a smart guy. Feel free to fuck the brother over any way you see fit. The characters in the stories I write never feel any pain, and so I doubt the brother in this instance would, either.

Luv n hugz

Lex

 

[luminum]

Sweetie, like said before, if you need to 'stick it to him' by using his younger brother, then you're clearly not over him. You've got baggage. You still feel the sting.

Getting over someone means that you've dropped the baggage and the drama. If you think karma is coming his way, then it'll get back to him without any interference from you. Not to mention, using someone's relative to get back at them 8 years after the fact just reeks of bad karma on your part.

 

[shea]

Sometimes things that we do like that hae a wayf
coming back and biting us on the ass.
Let it go, be the better man. Don't use an innocent
for your revenge.
Shea

 

[Danugh]

Well not one person here is giving the go ahead.

Just for the record i really am over him, i would never get into a relationship with him again. Its just i feel the need to make him pay, and then out of nowhere i meet his brother.

Everything i believe happens for a reason.


Why his brother? of all the people i could have met. There must be a reason why i met his brother all these years later.

Ok well i have some thinking to do.

 

[G-Lexington]

Just for the record i really am over him, i would never get into a relationship with him again. Its just i feel the need to make him pay.

"Over him" and "feel the need to make him pay" are mutually exclusive.

If you're over him, you won't feel the need to make him pay.
If you feel the need to make him pay, you're not over him.

And it sounds as if any action you take will probably cause some serious damage to the brother, who obviously hasn't done you any harm.

Lex

 

[StlKj]

Well not one person here is giving the go ahead.

Just for the record i really am over him, i would never get into a relationship with him again. Its just i feel the need to make him pay, and then out of nowhere i meet his brother.

Everything i believe happens for a reason.


Why his brother? of all the people i could have met. There must be a reason why i met his brother all these years later.

Ok well i have some thinking to do.

Perhaps the reason this is happening is to give you an opportunity to be a decent human being and do the right thing, rather than seek revenge, or even behave as you have in the past in some of your less than stellar actions you've related to us before.

Who knows? In behaving like a bigger person, you may even find this young man could be someone you grow to care about and put before your own selfish feelings.