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a really stupid problem

Eagle653

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People really ask you flat out, based on your voice? That's amazing.

Anyhow, if it really bothers you, you can get voice coaching. Lots of people do this, especially if they want to "project" their voices, do acting, or act more assertively. Managers, actors, and teachers are the biggest consumers of voice-coaching lessons. Some also join "toast masters" and other groups to train their voices and tweak their "outward demeanor."

It's hard to do though. One's speech patterns (tone, volume, inflections, etc.) are very habitual from way back to early childhood. Changing these habits requires a lot of conscious attention for some time. Some find it worth it; some don't. Still others just want to know HOW to do it, and then employ the techniques when they really need to.

I had to discipline my own voice was I was in radio broadcasting (to get rid of any hint of regionalism and accents). So, I have a "radio voice" and a regular voice. They're quite distinct now. Most of the time I don't really care about any accents or regionalisms. What's me is me and what comes out of my mouth is me too.

Good luck!
 
Oh yeah! I had no idea until I was asked by a linguistics student at my university if I would take part in a study on "the gay voice." I was kind of surprised, maybe a little bit insulted - but I am gay so I don't care if I sound gay.
 
I never thought I had a gay voice. Then I heard a tape replay of my voice. Damn. Guess what. I am soooo gay.
 
I never thought I had a gay voice. Then I heard a tape replay of my voice. Damn. Guess what. I am soooo gay.

Aint that the truth. Majority of people that hear their voice played back to them for the first time almost rejects it as being "theirs".

Funny how we percieve our voices to be deeper than they actually are.
 
I never thought I had a gay voice. Then I heard a tape replay of my voice. Damn. Guess what. I am soooo gay.

LOL!!!!

I thought I was the only one that thought that ... I do not sound like myself when I hear my own recording and I keep thinking .. damn, who is that bitch?

LOL!!!!
 
Ultimately I think you just have to accept yourself the way you are and try to forget about it.

I've seen myself on videos and have been surprised at hand gestures, etc. But I just say "screw it" and move on.
 
Apparently, my speaking mannerisms are "more gay" over the phone than in person. ::shrug::
 
Just ignore it. I know it's a pain, but there isn't much you can do about it. I have a high-pitched voice, and when I speak on the phone, people assume I'm a woman (and in person, some assume I'm gay). Just take some sarcastic humor in it.
 
I've actually had the opposite happen. People have said to me "you don't act/sound gay at all" and I just shrug and say "well, I like to fuck guys, so that's all that really matters, right?"

Stereotypes can be very annoying. Don't let them get to you. Be yourself.
 
I have a, um, friend who looks totally str8 in photos. He's just who he is.

But, man, as soon as he opens his mouth it just screams, "I'm gay!". LOL.

That's perfectly OK.

Oh, and this is hysterical:

When they ask, "Are you gay?" come back with a "Yeah... hello!! (laugh) Are you bi-sexual?"
 
Aint that the truth. Majority of people that hear their voice played back to them for the first time almost rejects it as being "theirs".

Funny how we percieve our voices to be deeper than they actually are.
Correct. I was appalled when I first heard my voice on record. It's just terrible.
 
neither me or my bf sound gay but when we are out you can tell were a couple i guess cause a girl who makes subs at subway came straight out and asked if we were a gay couple. I can't believe she asked. I said yes and she said cool. it was odd.but I guess when you're two guys and one is saying don't eat the hot peppers you'll regret it later than it's no surprise!LOL
 
We don't sound like "ourselves", on recordings, because the machine only picks up our External Sound. What everyone else hears from us. However, when we are talking, we are also hearing ourselves with our Inner Ear. The timber, and resonance, of our voice as it amplifies through our throat and sinuses. We all hear ourselves "Doubled", so to speak! (No pun intended!)

As for a "Gay Voice", it's usually attributed to inflection/cadence of our words. Not necessarily the tone. A very deep Bass voice can sound "Gay" if delivered with a "Lilt" or "Sing-Song", or, parTICularly strong EMphasis on CERtain SYLlables, SWEETie!! :D Of course, choice of words can contribute, too, HON! (group)

If it's something that bugs You, yes it can be changed through objective self-awareness, and training. Just like acquiring different accents. But if it's something that YOU are comfortable with ... so be it! :hurray: (!w!)

Can You imagine? Some folks, even "Here", give ME a little "grief" over my odd use of Caps, and quotes, in the way I Type!!! #-o :badgrin:

Keep smilin'!! :kiss: (*8*)
Chaz ;)

P.S.
Oh, yeah! I also hear about my use of the "Smilies"!! :eek: ](*,)
 
Also got the same problem, sound so camp/gay and have been called on it a few times by friends. I just shrug it off, got David Beckham to use as a scape goat in these situations, he has a very effeminate sounding voice and isn't gay ..|
 
y'know, I've managed to live with a gay voice and don't give a fuck either although i hate listening to my phone recording.....and who was the sick fuck who put so many ' s sounds in sibillance. I think that the cadence of the gay voice has to be clear indication that it is our genetic nature and not being being kidnapped and indoctrinated by renegade homosexuals that defines us.
 
This is probably going to sound really stupid, but here it goes. So, apperently I have a somewhat "gay sounding" voice, which people seem to notice. Now don't get me wrong i'm not ashamed of this, it just gets annoying. It's annoying to have people who i barely know ask me if I'm gay just based on my voice or talk behind my back about it. And I don't act gay at all it's just my voice that people pick up on. So i'm just wondering if anybody else has had to deal with this, and what they did. But don't get offende b/c again i'm not ashamed just annoyed! thanks.

I would regard my voice as girly its not deep much to my shame as I want it. I would say my mannerisisms(sp) are not overly femmie. Butwhen people make assuptions because I don't disscuss dating, relationships etc that I'm Gay I tell them that theyshould not make assumptions even if it istrue that I'm Gay.
 
I dont have the gay voice (thankgod) I do sound like a kid which i hate very much when i talk i always try to talk slow and deepen my voice. Its sad when a 14 15 year olds sounds more older and mature then me. I hate talking on the phone and chatrooms
 
Appropos of not recognizing our taped voice and rejecting the way we really sound. Normally we hear our voices 'internally' and the sound is mufled by the bones of the head. If you want to get a more accurate idea of the way you sound to other people try this: cup your hands behind your ears and then bring your elbows together in front of your face at about chin level, speak towards your joined elbows and the sound waves travel up your arms and into your ears.
 
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