Ahh, well..... so goes another one.

[Audio Tech]

So as many of you know, I came out 2 years ago now. I made the decision to tell a few friends whom I really cared about as human beings the truth about myself.

So initially all this was well and good. But I'm not an idiot. I saw the subtle signs of saying one thing to my face but acting differently. And so it took 2 years, but I have lost one of my dear friends. He just stopped returning phone calls, and even picked up and hung up the phone on me. He's VERY catholic, married, 3 kids and now fat.

You'd think at this age (he's 41, I'm 47) people would at least be grown up about it and just SAY it. I can totally respect someone's belief system, even if I don't agree with it. So his actions speak louder than words....

I'm disappointed, yes. But not angry. It IS what it is. I cannot, nor would I change myself JUST to conform to his (or anyone's ) beliefs. Just as I cannot change them.

The good thing is that I am slowly forgetting the past and building a new future. I have made some TRUE friends, some in the most unlikely people.
In the end, I am happier. I can be myself. I don't have to hide or pretend.
I guess the true loss isn't mine, but theirs.

So be it.

 

[Seasoned]

You have a great way of looking at the disappointment others can bring into our lives. It makes absolutely no sense for someone to turn off friendships like a light switch. It's happened to me as well. Your new friends can help you heal from this rejection. Best wishes.

 

[Rand]

It is painful to be rejected, but as you have realized, you can not change some people and life is still good. I am glad that you have found some real friends and that you are happier now than before. Continue to celebrate your life. Thanks for sharing your experience.

Rand

 

[Audio Tech]

Yeah, I thought I'd share this one because it took 2 YEARS for him to decide to just walk away. Not that we were close anyway these days.... I'd just meet him for lunch from time to time. But I guess even that was too much.

I figure it a lesson for others. Just because someone you come out to you receives it well, or so it seems, doesn't mean they actually do in the long run.

Whatever happens, be prepared to loose those who as it turns out, weren't your real friends to begin with.

At first I thought "what did I do to him to cause this?" But then I realized very quickly... "NOTHING".

Moving on...

It does seem that as people drop off my past, that I feel increasingly energized and free to move forward. I didn't expect that, but I actually feel BETTER.

Go figure...

 

[rareboy]

Meh.

The best ones are the dear 'friends' I had in HS who finally track me down after all the years have passed, only to find out that I have been in a relationship longer than most of them, that my relationship is more stable than theirs, that it is with a man and that I really have only the most superficial interest in what has been going on in their lives as well.

The ones that should have been the coolest with the news are the ones who seemed to recoil from the news...sometimes because I think they had some idea that I might now suddenly be available (both guys and women) or that they just couldn't get the image of me being a cocksucker or fudgepacker out of their heads.

Forget 'em. Move on. With 7 billion people clogging the planet, trust me, there are lots of real friends still out there.

 

[Telstra]

So as many of you know, I came out 2 years ago now. I made the decision to tell a few friends whom I really cared about as human beings the truth about myself.

So initially all this was well and good. But I'm not an idiot. I saw the subtle signs of saying one thing to my face but acting differently. And so it took 2 years, but I have lost one of my dear friends. He just stopped returning phone calls, and even picked up and hung up the phone on me. He's VERY catholic, married, 3 kids and now fat.

You'd think at this age (he's 41, I'm 47) people would at least be grown up about it and just SAY it. I can totally respect someone's belief system, even if I don't agree with it. So his actions speak louder than words....

I'm disappointed, yes. But not angry. It IS what it is. I cannot, nor would I change myself JUST to conform to his (or anyone's ) beliefs. Just as I cannot change them.

The good thing is that I am slowly forgetting the past and building a new future. I have made some TRUE friends, some in the most unlikely people.
In the end, I am happier. I can be myself. I don't have to hide or pretend.
I guess the true loss isn't mine, but theirs.

So be it.

He is not your friend and he got issues that is why he is fat.
Hope he don't get heart attack.

 

[Telstra]

Yeah, I thought I'd share this one because it took 2 YEARS for him to decide to just walk away. Not that we were close anyway these days.... I'd just meet him for lunch from time to time. But I guess even that was too much.

I figure it a lesson for others. Just because someone you come out to you receives it well, or so it seems, doesn't mean they actually do in the long run.

Whatever happens, be prepared to loose those who as it turns out, weren't your real friends to begin with.

At first I thought "what did I do to him to cause this?" But then I realized very quickly... "NOTHING".

Moving on...

It does seem that as people drop off my past, that I feel increasingly energized and free to move forward. I didn't expect that, but I actually feel BETTER.

Go figure...

This is actually a good advice. People drop off as the baggage drop off.

 

[Audio Tech]

Forget 'em. Move on. With 7 billion people clogging the planet, trust me, there are lots of real friends still out there.

Already forgotten. Shedding my past actually feels very good.
At least now I truly KNOW who my friends are.

 

[KaraBulut]

At least now I truly KNOW who my friends are.

And that exactly, is the point.