Does anyone on here drink too much?
I am a complete fuck up when it comes to booze and drugs. For some reason nothing really bad has happened to me yet, but I can't help thinking it is only a matter of time. I was sober for many years, but about 5 years ago I "slipped" (which means I made a decision to take the first drink). Since then I have not been able to stay sober. I go for about two months at a time and then I have an overwhelming urge to drink. Last night my partner and I had a nice dinner party. I went to the gym in the morning, but on the way there I picked up a bottle of vodka. After my workout I went into a stall, poured the booze into a water bottle (which I then hid in an overnight bag in the ensuite) and drank the remainider. I came home and made many trips to the bathroom since all of the people at the party know that I "don't drink". It is now Sunday afternoon. I have no real recollection of the past twelve hours. I do know I left the party I was hosting and went to a bar by myself and danced until the sun came up. The owner of the bar put me in a taxi around sixish with one of his employees to make sure I made it home ok. I have lost my jacket and my mobile. I do remember that my glasses fell off my head and were trampled on the dance floor.
I am a professional: I have a good job, a wonderful partner, great friends, a loving family and two adorable cats. Nonetheless, I can't seem to help destroying all that is good in my life.
Can anyone relate? If you can, please respond. I know I need to get to a meeting but I am currently on my fourth beer (necessary to stop the shaking so I can light a smoke).
I feel like I should take that last beer bottle, smash it on the floor, pick up a piece of broken glass and slice my fucking wrists.
I am a complete fuck up when it comes to booze and drugs. For some reason nothing really bad has happened to me yet, but I can't help thinking it is only a matter of time. I was sober for many years, but about 5 years ago I "slipped" (which means I made a decision to take the first drink). Since then I have not been able to stay sober. I go for about two months at a time and then I have an overwhelming urge to drink. Last night my partner and I had a nice dinner party. I went to the gym in the morning, but on the way there I picked up a bottle of vodka. After my workout I went into a stall, poured the booze into a water bottle (which I then hid in an overnight bag in the ensuite) and drank the remainider. I came home and made many trips to the bathroom since all of the people at the party know that I "don't drink". It is now Sunday afternoon. I have no real recollection of the past twelve hours. I do know I left the party I was hosting and went to a bar by myself and danced until the sun came up. The owner of the bar put me in a taxi around sixish with one of his employees to make sure I made it home ok. I have lost my jacket and my mobile. I do remember that my glasses fell off my head and were trampled on the dance floor.
I am a professional: I have a good job, a wonderful partner, great friends, a loving family and two adorable cats. Nonetheless, I can't seem to help destroying all that is good in my life.
Can anyone relate? If you can, please respond. I know I need to get to a meeting but I am currently on my fourth beer (necessary to stop the shaking so I can light a smoke).
I feel like I should take that last beer bottle, smash it on the floor, pick up a piece of broken glass and slice my fucking wrists.



