It doesn't matter what 'hardships' you endure growing up it is your responsibility not to repeat the mistakes of the past
The problem with sexual abuse, like all social problems, is memes and judgmental quotes about personal accountability don't solve social problems. If they did I'd buy every billboard in this country and put elementary, quasi-inspirational quotes on them about lifting yourself up out of adversity.
Trauma takes a toll on the mind and if we look at sex crimes in a scientific manner rather than the abstract, statistically victims of abuse have a high likelihood of becoming offenders. I call it generational sex offenders.
Using myself as an example, if I molest 20 people (two or three try to come forward and get shamed and bullied into oblivion) at least 3 of them will become abusers, those 3 molest a total of 60 people, 20 out of those 60 become abusers et cetera et cetera. You can wag your finger all you want but the ONLY thing that will end the cycle is cutting the dragon's head off. Quotes about perseverence serve little more than the ego of the person speaking them. Memes aren't a sincere or legitimate response to social problems, they're a pat on the back for being better than everybody else.
I was one of the lucky Americans who wasn't sexually abused as a child. I can wax poetic about how that could never be me but if i was attacked or abused at a young age who knows what kind of person I would be? And it's kinda hard to take some people seriously when just 2 doors down there's a thread of people going "So what?" about a cop raping a 16 year old. (To note: the absence of violence, or in the case of minors voluntary participation does not mean a rape wasn't committed)
Instead of blaming people who were failed at every turn by their parents, peers, schools, communities and law enforcement what if we held ourselves accountable for failing to create an environment where victims feel comfortable coming forward? We had an entire movement about ending sexual abuse and nobody mentioned vulnerable groups like the poor or our prison population where, under the watch of the state, rape happens on a regular basis.
If we're not going to take these problems seriously and all we're gonna do is lecture people about choices then the predators have already won. Meanwhile a teacher bangs some underage students, gets caught, flees town, changes his name and starts the cycle all over again in a neighboring state. We have 24 hour security in a museum for a dress marilyn monroe wore 70 years ago but our action plan for keeping kids safe is "GOOD LUCK NOT GETTING RAPED!"
If people are so concerned with sexual abuse why do we allow homelessness? Many homeless people are sex offenders. If the state has designated a person as a verifiable rapist and declines to keep track of them how can any of us feel confident that we're safe from sex crimes?
And it goes without saying which communities are impacted by this the most. I know so many poor and black women who are already promiscuous by 10 or 11 cuz somebody made that choice for them at 5. And for all our sanctimonious wailing about choices we choose to turn a blind eye to a system that has allowed predators to grow and thrive and escape prosecution. These arrests are not a meal they're crumbs and the only people cheering them on as proof that the system works are people who have not ever had to deal with victims of sexual abuse on a personal level There are entire families of women and kids who can just sit in the living room trading rape stories. When I see stories like this all it does is remind me how many more are out there we haven't caught and aren't even trying to catch. All the more damning since we have satellites in space that can tell you which side of a dime is face up on the street, but we don't have real-time tracking for known offenders or any sort of plan of action to protect children besides wishing them luck.
STOP THE LECTURES. START SPENDING MONEY ON PROGRAMS THE SAME WAY WE SPEND MONEY ON FANCY SCHMANCY GOVERNMENT BUILDINGS WITH $24k flower beds affluent people ruin annually by not curbing their pets.
Sincerely,
an actual advocate for victims of sexual abuse
that’s really going to chap his arse 
