Beginner needs guidance

[sunman69]

I'm just about at the stage of accepting that I'm bisexual. I would want to be a top, but i want to also experience different pleasures. And I've also noticed some pleasures of playing with my ass. I've been starting with 1 finger and got up to 3 and maybe 4.

Now heres the problem, I don't want to buy lube or a Dildo! I use either spit or a little soap for lube and my fingers instead of a dido. I dont want to buy those things because of embarrassment if my roomates found it.

Please is this healthy and can i continue to do it! And also is there any good substitutes for lube or a Dildo?

Thanks guys!

 

[silversmith1213]

Hey Sunman.

First off- avoid soap as an anal lubricant (or any lubricant). It can wear down the lining in your rectum and it dries stuff out. Spit is a better option if you can't buy lube, or pre-cum works pretty well if you can work up to that. However, not much beats a real lube. If you're embarrassed think about getting a small lock box you can hide your toys and lube in.

As far as dildos go, most "homemade" dildos don't work that great. You could always try a cucumber with a condom on it, but alternatively you could look for a discreet Dildo Lots of dildos don't look like a giant penis. You can find a plain one pretty easy and hide it.

 

[AlmondMilk]

As for lube, I don't think it's as embarrassing to find lube as it is a Dildo If they're guys, then, I don't think they'll think twice . You're not the only guy who will masturbate

Probably get some sort of box and put a lock on it so it's not easily accessible?

 

[mbamike]

I have my "toys" locked inside of a briefcase in my room. So, no chance of them being discovered.

You can buy condoms that have lube already on them. If they are discovered, just tell your roomie that you are getting some and playing safe.

Then use the condom on any cylindrical object in your room. I have stuck all kinds of objects up my ass in the past.

In reality, you will eventually need more than just objects fucking your ass. At least, I did.

 

[Samwyn]

With lube, don't worry about anyone finding it.

First of all, if someone finds it, I'd be asking why they were snooping around your room in the first place, and secondly, when my bf lived with a housefull of guys, we would regularly go and 'borrow' lube from them when they were out. So straight guys use it with girls as well, so don't worry.

You could go to a sex shop in the evening to buy one (avoids the delivery embarassment) or there are some sites that guarantee discretion (I have verify that!) And once again, if your housemates find it, say you use it on a girl, or just avoid the issue by getting mad at them for invading your privacy!!
xx

 

[fed1983]

A girl friend of mine has some KY lube in her room, just on a shelf, not hidden or anything. To my embarrassment I also discovered that my mother has KY lube in one of her drawers... So, even women use it to have sex with men. So if they discover you you can always say that it's to enhance your vagina fucking.

Anyway, if you're still embarrassed to go and buy some, when I was in your situation I used to use some creams for the skin, esp moisturizing lotions. But I don't know if just any cream will work fine with your anus...

But please stop using soap, doesn't it hurt after you use it for a while?

Also, I just realized you can get some lube, and empty the content into an empty tube of some other product, such as cream for example, or something that doesn't get you embarrassed if discovered, and throw the original tube of lube away

 

[KaraBulut]

Now heres the problem, I don't want to buy lube or a dildo! I use either spit or a little soap for lube and my fingers instead of a dido. I dont want to buy those things because of embarrassment if my roomates found it.

Please is this healthy and can i continue to do it! And also is there any good substitutes for lube or a dildo?

The general rule is that if you wouldn't put it in your mouth, you shouldn't put it in your ass. Soap is an irritant that is used as a laxative. It's not a good idea to use it as an anal lubricant. Go buy some lube and put it in your bedside table. Your roommates jack off like you do. You're an adult and you're living with adult roommates, so none of you should be pretending like you're not sexual beings.

As for anal toys, fingers are fine. You're better off using things that were designed for anal play- dildos and buttplugs. If you are embarrassed that your roommates might find it, then buy a small firesafe (available at any hardware or office supply store) and keep it locked up in your closet. A firesafe isn't something that is unusual and you can store other personal documents, computer backups and other stuff along with your toys and no one will think it odd.

 

[palemale]

And also is there any good substitutes for lube or a dildo?

Thanks guys!

I never used a Dildo In my experience, a hard, 9" cock is a very good substitute for a Dildo However, there is no good substitute for lube when a hard, 9" cock is penetrating you.

 

[jason1977]

Here is what I did, although I'd always recommend asking a doctor first before trying anything. So, I'm just sharing something from my past as an FYI.

Years ago, I tried a small travel shampoo bottle (being careful of the size and shape), wrapped it in TP (secured with Scotch tape) and then placed a condom over it. It gave me the softness, a "shape" that starts narrow and soft at one end (the cap end) and the condom was easily tossed. I used a mild hair conditioner for lube and it was OK for me. But, maybe this whole method and use of a conditioner was a really a terrible idea. Anyway. I was in a similar situation and preferred to put something together vs buy something expensive, especially as I only wanted something for a few days of preparation. It was cheap, took just a few minutes to put together and I could dispose of it easily. The most important part for me was the TP's placement. It created the thickness and helped make it soft and "smooth." Without it, I just had a hard object with rough corners. Of course, the more TP I wrapped around it... the thicker it got. For me, this assured that I was better prepared for whatever.

For someone who hasn't bottomed, some advance preparation can be done over a few days vs. during a sexual encounter when a lack of preparation could easily cause some unpleasant pain or injury (or for things to end abruptly because it's too much to handle for either you or the other person).

Be careful of putting things in yourself, however. Ask a doctor about the risks before you try anything like what I tried. Like I said, I did that years ago. Many doctors today have heard it all. You don't want to put something in there that you can't get out, damages you, etc. The last thing you want is to injure yourself OR to end up in the ER trying to explain what's stuck in there - or what you've been up to. Better to go safe and ask your doctor in the privacy of his office. He'll probably just mention fingers and lube. But, you never know. To some doctors they actually consider anal sex to be destructive or a "traumatic" physical event to a part of the body that isn't meant for that. I'm not sure what those doctors would say concerning advice. They'd probably discourage you from any form of anal sex.

 

[ruicostarp]

Hi,

I understand your concerns and embarrassment, I pass by that yesterday when I went out to bought some lube. I was ashamed to enter in a drugstore to do it. Before when I needed some lube, a close friend of mine did that for me, but It was time do it for myself, and yesterday after passing by 7 drugstores I finally chose one and I bought my lube.

I need do it again now for my Dildo & plugs, after all I was silly throwing all my toys in the garbage after I cumming and feel guilt etc.

Oh, and like fed1983 said, you may put the lube in a empty content and if anyone ask, you say it's your cream for hands, face or whatever you want.

Good Luck.