Being Christian and gay at the same time?

[relejandro12]

Hi guys. I’m not a very religious person, but I’ve always believed in God and Jesus. Lately, I’m having problems to reconcile my beliefs and my sexual orientation.

Since I was a little kid, I always imagined being with a beautiful woman and forming a family with children. I imagined being a father and educating my children with joy (I still do it when I see a child). But when I started to realize I was gay, I repudiated it because I didn’t want to be so. I knew it would bring complications in the future and I wanted to change.

So I went like that for a few years in my teens. I even researched about psychological theories of why people are gay and about supposed transformation therapies to stop being homosexual. However, I noticed that most people who had participated of these therapies had developed a great sense of frustration in their lives and that the range of suicides of these patients was very high. Therefore, over time I came to accept the fact that I was born like this and it was not my fault. I was just created this way. And without actually accepting 100% at least at the age of 20 I was living with the supposed certainty that being was gay was not wrong.

However, during this last two years many "coincidences" and important situations in my life have occurred that have made my faith in God to grow quite. Especially in the last three months, I have lived some serious events that could directly relate to my sexual orientation and could be interpreted as God is calling my attention.

I know many of you are atheists or those who believe in God are assured that if you're gay is because He made you like this. But I cannot just ignore the fact of the evil concept that The Bible has about gay people, and I need to know how to reconcile my beliefs with what I am.

I hope you can give some advice, especially from the Christian point of view (if there are some around here) and I have lot of uncertainty.

 

[Stardreamer]

Check out Religious Tolerance (.org) they have quite a few good articles all broken down by subject matter that you might find useful. I am not sure I can be much help directly, I call myself a fallen Christian. I still believe in the divine (God) but I gave up my faith in the Church for numerous reasons, the views on gays being one of them, sometime ago and do not go anymore. One of the things I believe based on Religious Tolerance when I first read it and views from other places is that God does not condemn you personally for being Gay, as you say you are as God made you and he loves you as a person. If that is not true then he is not someone who deserves your love in return.

The Bible does not directly condemn homosexuality, it cannot because the concepts needed to do so did not even exist at the time it was written. The Bible condemns certain acts and behaviors which I believe have been expanded upon to mean a general condemnation of homosexuality but that may not be what was meant. I also am not one who believes in the Bible must be taken as literal, its inspiration may be God but that inspiration was filtered through the all to Human writers who were products of their times and cultures. Later translations and interpretations have added even more to that problem. There is wisdom to be gained from it but it requires study and reflection. Don't accept anyone's ideas on what it means without question whether they be Pope or atheist, far too many who claim to know its meaning or lack there of are simply using it to justify their own views and bias.

The common views of the Bible in relation to homosexuality are wrong interpretations in my opinion. The Old Testament laws were concerned with the physical and spiritual purity of the bloodline that would eventually produce Christ and focused on specific acts. The sin of Sodom was cruelty and inhumanity to others and if homosexuality played it part in it, it was in the planned act of rape not love. The condemnation of the Romans was in sexual practices based in lust and acts based solely on pleasure and not love. A lot of people will try to say that the Bible specifically condemns Gay people but I think that those people reach those interpretations out of hate, they want justify their hate of Gays or they want you to hate God. But again these are my personal feelings on the matter, I make no claim to be a Bible scholar are to know intimately the inner mind of God. I just feel that at best God is a loving God and at worst an indifferent one. Either way, he does not hate you for what you are.

Your relationship with God in the end is a personal one. The Bible is simply a tool to help you develop and understand that relationship. If God is the loving father that we are to believe then he would not have made you something that he hates and we know enough now about the nature of our creation to know that homosexuality is not simply a choice so therefore it must have a place in God's plan and those who are Gay a place in his heart.

 

[checkinthingsout]

Your relationship with God in the end is a personal one. The Bible is simply a tool to help you develop and understand that relationship. If God is the loving father that we are to believe then he would not have made you something that he hates and we know enough now about the nature of our creation to know that homosexuality is not simply a choice so therefore it must have a place in God's plan and those who are Gay a place in his heart.

This. You can TRY to reconcile it with the bible/religious doctrine, but in the end you will fail, because of the nature of religious doctrine. What I do is try to practice the specific religion/sect that I am closest to, but personally believe the teachings and laws of morality from that religion that I deem relevant for my life, spiritually enriching, and bring ME closer to GOD. Essentially creating my own religion based on the established doctrine of another.

That is how protestantism was born from Catholicism, and how Catholicism was born of a Jewish sect that believed in Christ as the Messiah, and how that sect grew from Judaism.

 

[Seasoned]

You've been indroctrinated to believe that homosexuality is morally wrong. Until you come to terms with the fact that religions come from people and that the bible wasn't written in English and can be translated different ways and that Jesus never uttered a word against homosexuals you'll be in this self doubt and self loathing.

It's time to find a sect that accepts you for who you are and time to get other perspectives on Christianity and acceptance of all people. That's the real Christian message.

 

[TX-Beau]

OK, most of us grew up Christian (sorry non-westerners) and most of us aren't anymore.

We can go into arguments academic and esoteric about things like translation and ancient cultures and what they "really" meant, and all of that is bullshit and useless because NO ONE really knows or can know and we don't live two thousand years ago anyway.

The only thing that matters is what the various denominations have accepted as doctrine NOW, you aren't going to convince a Baptist you aren't a sinner, because Jesus never mentioned the gay.

Which is where we come to the undeniable fact that most Christian denominations are unfortunately some degree of homophobic. It's getting better sure, but don't pretend to yourself that it's going away anytime soon.

You will either have to strike out on your own, spiritually speaking, give it up, or find a more liberal denomination - they exist - that will accept you. End of story.

 

[LutheranGuy]

According to God, loneliness is not good. “It is not good for a man to be alone." (Genesis 2:18)
Loneliness is not God's plan for us. We were fashioned for community. We were "hardwired" for relationship. God wants us to, “Experience a completely fulfilling, blushingly unpredictable, emotionally empowering and recklessly romantic love.” That love requires, “Words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and then physical touch.” (Undressed, Jason Illian,2006)

Christ mentions that he came not only to give us life, but to have it abundantly. (John 10:10) This idea that the gift of sexuality is given and then struck down away from us as forbidden fruit is not anywhere to be found from Jesus. Sex was God's idea and design, it is very very good. There are two instances in the bible where same sex is mentioned. Moses who wrote Leviticus, and Paul who lettered Romans. Moses lived before Christ, and Paul lived after him. Christ in all of his deliberate asterisks on human life doesn't comment. But that, "you might have life, and have it abundantly." Part of the abundant life is to journey with a partner. From the four loves by C.S. Lewis this journey involves Eros. Jesus Christ does not say our experience of Eros cannot be with a man. Moses and Paul dissent. But what about Christ, his silence says it all.

Tell your date that abundant life means to experience all of God's gifts with thanksgiving. Loving a man is one of those gifts. In the words of Apple CEO Tim Cook recently, "I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me."

 

[Beelzebubble]

New Direction is a really good ministry that tries to help people just like you. It's Canadian, but you might find some really good resources and ideas on their website, newdirection.ca.

 

[hylas]

Just one obvious example, the bible also endorses slavery. I don't say that to hate on the bible, I just want to point out that most christians believe in the bible selectively. Unless you're telling me that you think slavery is a good thing, you're already believing in the bible selectively. And since you're already presumabley skipping the slavery endorsing parts, there's no reason you can also start skipping the homophobic parts.

 

[mbamike]

This topic has been discussed numerous times on this site. So, rest assured you are not alone. I have done my own soul searching on this topic to come to peace with being gay.

Here is the short and sweet version. The Bible does not condemn a person from being gay. The Bible does not condemn two consenting adults from engaging in gay sex.

Those passages the fundamentalist like to use to justify their hate are all referring to the male temple prostitutes that were used to worship the pagan god Molech. So, the condemnation is on the idolatry worship, not gays.

 

[Mariatenebre]

This topic has been discussed numerous times on this site. So, rest assured you are not alone. I have done my own soul searching on this topic to come to peace with being gay.

Here is the short and sweet version. The Bible does not condemn a person from being gay. The Bible does not condemn two consenting adults from engaging in gay sex.

Those passages the fundamentalist like to use to justify their hate are all referring to the male temple prostitutes that were used to worship the pagan god Molech. So, the condemnation is on the idolatry worship, not gays.

So instead of condemning homosexuality your religion condemns people of other religions. Way to go in showing how supposedly liberal and tolerant Christianity is by rejecting religious freedom.

 

[checkinthingsout]

So instead of condemning homosexuality your religion condemns people of other religions. Way to go in showing how supposedly liberal and tolerant Christianity is by rejecting religious freedom.

I fail to see the purpose of this remark. Doesn't every religion believe they hold the keys to the afterlife and morality?

And you are reading this waaay out of context. During the foundation of the Jewish religion in the early parts of the Bible there were several religions in the region and the early Jewish leaders were trying to distinguish theirs from the others. Male temple prostitution is a practice from other religions that they were trying to use within Judaism, which they are really condemning. Not so much a different religion are they "condemning" than the act of worshiping the Christian/Jewish/Muslim God by selling your body.