Boyfriend's number on bathroom wall

[Michael Luc]

I was in a restaurant with my lover tonight. We’ve been together one-and-a-half years. Mid way through the meal, he went to the bathroom and was in there quite a while. Just before we left, I decided to use the bathroom. I saw his telephone number on the wall of the stall, below the word blowjobs.

I was shocked and went out and confronted him. He pretended like he didn’t believe me. So, we both went to the bathroom and I showed it to him. He denied putting it there and said that wasn’t even his handwriting. So, now I’m thinking that someone he sucked off put it up there. (He kept saying the one was a seven, so it wasn't his number.)

I am furious with him, but he says he’s innocent. Of course we had a huge fight and now I don’t know what to do. What do you think?

 

[gabriel1]

kick him to the curb

 

[fag lick]

how clean was the washroom?

 

[Scrub]

I'd believe the BF.

I don't think he would do something like that.

 

[MRMATTX2]

It would depend on the level of trust, and how deep the relationship really is.

If I felt I really knew the guy...and that didn't seem like him at all, I'd believe him and let it go. But, if he had a past.....(like myself and many others, I admit) of many many casual encounters - then I'd be all over him about it.


Good Luck in any case!

 

[Hard Luck]

I'm a benefit of the doubt guy, too.



Is he the type of guy to lie about things to your face? Is he kind who does give anonymous blowjobs in restaurant restrooms?

More to the point, is he the kind of guy stupid enough to write his number under a blowjob advert in the restaurant where you were dining together?? It doesn't seem to make much sense.



Whatever it may be, I don't think one such problem deserves to shatter a relationship. But you're the one in the relationship, and ultimately the only one who can make the decision based on a million added-up things.

 

[Croynan]

I'd believe the BF.

I don't think he would do something like that.

"Knowing" the persons involved, this just does not sound like the behaviours of someone very special to you.​

​

eM. ​

 

[Christopher123]

Get someone he doesn't knwo to call him or a use a friend's cell or payphone to call him and see if he's willing to set up a time and place, and then you'll know for sure.
Especially if your that worried.

This is what I'd do, personally.

One way or the other, you need to know for sure. And having someone you know (that HE doesn't know) call him to see his reaction is better than flat out accusing him in case he really is telling the truth.

That's how I'd try and find out, anyway. Devious and conniving, maybe, but I wouldn't care. I'd wanna know. Right fucking now.

 

[Hard Luck]

Forget calling him ... dial with number with a 7 instead of a 1, and see if the bloke on the other end will meet up to give you a bj.

Then you'll know without having to bother to go all CIA on you boyfriend.

 

[CGHJ]

I'd wait at least a week for him to let his guard down, then have someone call. I bet he didn't do it though. I hope not anyway.

Once I had a friend I was having a fight with. He went out with a girl to talk about it, and I went to a movie. Turns out we went to the same movie, and I sat just a few seats away from them. In the dark I HAD NO IDEA, truly, but it was hard to convince them I wasn't a stalker, which seriously made the original problem worse. There's some crazy-ass coincidences in this world...give him the benefit of the doubt...but check it out for your own peace of mind.

 

[Christopher123]

Forget calling him ... dial with number with a 7 instead of a 1, and see if the bloke on the other end will meet up to give you a bj.

Then you'll know without having to bother to go all CIA on you boyfriend.

Oooooo, good idea, yep

 

[HPNJ2006]

I'm sometimes a benefit of the doubt guy, but I can easily forfeit that. IF this is the first weird thing like this that has ever happened, he gets the benefit. IF, however, this is one in a chain of 3, 4, 8, 20 clues that something is fishy w/ this guy, then I think you'd better get to the bottom of it and probably end up realizing this relationship isn't healthy and fulfilling for either of you.

 

[CGHJ]

Forget calling him ... dial with number with a 7 instead of a 1, and see if the bloke on the other end will meet up to give you a bj.

Genius!

Then you'll know without having to bother to go all CIA on you boyfriend.

LOL

 

[andyspete]

Perhaps it's my natural inclination to be suspicious but I don't believe for a second that the bf is telling the truth. Logic tends to be the best truth teller. How logical is it that you find his number in the bathroom after he's just visited it and stayed in there for "quite a while", and he claims he didn't write it?? Doesn't add up. He wrote it or at the very least knows how and why it's up there. Bottom line: He's lying. Sorry.

 

[jackoroe]

It all depends on your level of trust. What do you know about his sexual past? Did he engage in this type of behavior? Has he lied to you in the past? If he hasn't been dishonest, why not give him the benefit of the doubt? A year and a half is a significant investment. It would be a shame to throw it away needlessly.

 

[Christopher123]

Perhaps it's my natural inclination to be suspicious but I don't believe for a second that the bf is telling the truth. Logic tends to be the best truth teller. How logical is it that you find his number in the bathroom after he's just visited it and stayed in there for "quite a while", and he claims he didn't write it?? Doesn't add up. He wrote it or at the very least knows how and why it's up there. Bottom line: He's lying. Sorry.

Honestly, though, we can't make that judgment. There's really only one way for Michael to be sure... call the 'other' number himself. Flat out tell the dude that he saw his number on the bathroom wall and ask him what's up. If the guy freaks or hangs up or whatever, then I'd take the next step and have someone I know, but someone my boyfriend doesn't know, call him and nonchalantly say, "Hey, I saw your number on the bathroom wall of so & so restaurant, is that legit?"

We also have to take into consideration the fact that maybe someone ELSE wrote that number there, not him. Yes, I would be, at that point, wondering WHY someone else wrote the number and how they got it. But perhaps it was a misprint. Which is why I'd be doing some calling myself.

And that's my opinion on the whole thing.

 

[fiorio]

I would call the number and set a time and place.

No one takes those bathroom numbers serious. Someone is just messing with you.

exactly what i was thinking after reading the thread

 

[sixthson]

I don't agree with all this covert phone calling to check up on the bf. This will probably only bring more misery and distrust between you. There shouldn't be espionage between lovers, there should be trust. People do break trust, however. Obviously you are doubting now. What if your worst fears are confirmed? What if you are the one who is wrong?

Many of us know of the relationship between the two of you and it is awkward for us, to say the least. This is definitely something that needs to be worked out between the two of you in private.

It's time for open and honest communication between you. You are both capable of it. Only this, and none of this other foolishness about trick phone calls, will resolve this.

Good luck.

 

[luvcock]

OMG!
Michael, you must be so hurt. Just think it through first. I would do what EffortlessPro said:

"Get someone he doesn't knwo to call him or a use a friend's cell or payphone to call him and see if he's willing to set up a time and place, and then you'll know for sure."



Thinking about it though, it sounds like a joke or a prank but you never know....

I agree with Elvin1..

 

[Scrub]

Many of us know of the relationship between the two of you and it is awkward for us, to say the least. This is definitely something that needs to be worked out between the two of you in private.

I couldn't agree more. I've been sitting here for the last couple of minutes wondering why this thread exists.