"Can I see a picture of your dick?" - please explain

[chrisdobro]

Recently had this conversation (you can skip all the convo if you like, but look at the last 3 lines):

I post an ad on craigslist to have a guy suck on me. I get a reply from a guy and he includes pictures of his dick.

• guy: I am a "straight" guy who loves the idea of playing with your dick. Sucking, licking, rimming- all good with me. My mouth never tires and I want to worship your penis. You can fuck my throat too if you like. I'm 23, 6'1", thin white and good looking. I don't do face pics. I'm very discreet and live my life straight.
• me: No offense but your dick looks unusual. Why is that? [his dick had foreskin attached to his dick at the top, but not at the bottom. I have never seen that before.]
• guy: None taken, it's just the way the skin connects from circumcision. It doesn't affect anything in the least. If it doesn't do it for you, that's fine. I've never actually had anyone bring it up before. Girls are always quite happy with my penis. Let me know if you're interested.
• me: Well I would like to meet you. That will help me decide if I want to do something or not. Tonight is late for me, but tomorrow I am free after 5pm.
• guy: Sounds fair. Lets check in tomorrow and see if we can meet up. Do you have any more pictures?
• me: We can meet up at McDonald’s on X. We can go from there
• guy: Can I see a picture of your dick?
• me: I do not send dick pictures.
• guy: Alright, I understand. I'm not interested then though. No hard feelings.

Here is my take -- I am gay. My attraction to guys comes from looking at the guy's faces and bodies. I have my preferences which are guys my age or younger and who are in shape to average. For this reason, I ask to see face and body photos. I do not mind it as much if guys cannot send photos because they are discreet. That's why I want to meet them and decide.

If I like the face and body, I then do not care about what their dick looks like. I can deal with small dick, large dick, cut, uncut, bent, not bent, low balls, high balls, etc. etc. If I for some reason cannot deal with the guy's dick, I can focus on his ass, face, armpits, making out, etc. etc. So a dick is not a deal breaker for me. I do not need to see it.

I do not quite understand the attraction purely to dick though. So if I am not really that hot, but my dick and crotch area are gorgeous and divine, will those guys be attracted to me? Or maybe they assume that if my dick is gorgeous, it really doesn't matter what my face and body look like? Kind of like reverse way of attraction than mine?

I do not quite understand that, because for me, if I like the face, I do not care about dick. And if a guy sends his dick picture, but not the face, I just do not have enough information about the guy to see if I want to meet him or not. Exceptions are if I see the dick is dirty or the guy is way older or way out of shape, or something else is wrong, then I do not meet. But usually, and if it's a reasonable dick, it does not tell me much. It can be attached to a guy I will like in the face, or a guy I will not like in the face. So I need to see the face and some of the body.

Can you please explain this to me as much as you can, as to why guys care about the penis and not about the face? I am thinking that maybe it is a straight/bi thing, which is why I am posting in this forum.

 

[HunterM]

Some people are into dicks while others are into dykes. To each his/her own.

 

[sizeaddict28]

it's simple....some men have a dick fetish...just like some people are really turned on by butts, or feet, or nipples...etc. the guy told you in his reply that he "loves the idea of playing with your dick" and wants to "worship your penis". that tells me that he's REALLY into dick. what this guy didn't say (and probably should have) is that he apparently gets turned on by certain types of dick....cut, uncut, long, fat, curved, veined, what have you. or he could just be like me and wants to see a pic of it in order to know what he's worshiping beforehand, to know if it's going to turn him on or not. true "dick lovers" simply aren't as interested in your body or face as they are your dick. if you just want to hookup with a run-of-the-mill dicksucker that's fine, but if you want a true "worshiper", he's going to want to see a dick pic.

 

[palbert]

I think you handled the situation in a way in which you are comfortable. I don't see a problem or a reason to feel concerned. (And I think it wise to not send dick pics to whomever asks; you have no way of knowing if he's legit or a cop even.)

 

[chrisdobro]

thanks sizeaddict. It seems like the guy probably has a dick fetish. That's something I understand.

palbert, good point. I wouldn't normally mind sending my dick, but I have an issue with having my xxx pics out there. If it was like sending a picture of my elbow, or armpits, or feet, I would do that. But my dick is kind of a stretch. If I didn't care about my self-image, or where the pic ends up, I probably would not mind sending it. But lol I guess I care. Maybe I can research on how to do it safely so that it doesn't come back to haunt me in some way.

 

[chrisdobro]

so I have decided to take a shot at it, and send my cock picture. Before sending pics I told the guy exactly what my dick stats are, so he knew beforehand. He still wanted to see it.

I took like 10-15 pics of my cock from various directions and then painstakingly narrowed it down to 3 good shots. I sent them. The guy never replied. Figures. Not even a courtesy "thanks but not my type of cock" reply for my hard work and making an exception for him. I don't think I will be sending my XXX pics to someone again. Not worth the effort or the risk of having my naked pics out there.

I guess for guys like that it is all about the cock and nothing about the person, which explains this type of behavior. I am just treated as a cock object with something irrelevant attached to that cock - body, person, mind.

When someone asks me for my ass or dick pics, I will go back to just dropping conversation and ceasing talking to them, or saying "nope, bye", whichever is appropriate, as I have been doing before. This experience right here is a good hard reason for wrapping up conversations fast and cutting your losses. I was slightly upset about this, if you can tell, but I'll get over it.

 

[sizeaddict28]

i don't mean to sound harsh about this, but you put an ad up on "craigslist" looking for a cocksucker...you can't be that shocked that any guy that replied would only be interested in your cock. Craigslist is where a guy goes if he's looking for cock or ass, not anything more than that.

Also, you shouldn't assume that the guy didn't respond because he didn't like your cock...it could be that he found another cock to play with and now he's done looking...or maybe he just gave up looking, got himself off and just isn't interested right now because he's not horny...or maybe he just never saw your reply.

I think you were expecting too much from CL....most guys there aren't looking for conversation or to get to know you...they just want quick hookups, so that's clearly not the place for you. a place like Outpersonals might be a better fit for you.

As for the issue you have with sending XXX pics, that's just a reality when you're looking for sex online. For me personally, I like guys with really big cocks. It's very difficult to find out what a guy is packing in most social settings (bar/club, store/mall, park, etc)...I can't very well ask him to pull out his cock and get it hard so I can see what it looks like and how big it is. But online, all he has to do snap a pic of it and hit "send". If you're looking for sex online, then sending pics is just a given (most won't even talk to you unless you have them to send). If that's too uncomfortable for you, then you should look into online sites that focus less on sex hookups on more on friendship/relationship meetings.