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Coming out and first post, feel free to comment :)

soulseeker

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Hi there, I have lurked around this site for a month. But finally decide to post here after mustering all my courage ;). I have to say this website is phenomenal, it gives me a lot of answers to some of my existing problems. The people are friendly, well most of them, anyway. ..|. I have been in the closet for 20 years but finally decide to come out with the help of the university counselor. Right now I am in grad school. Busy with study but still have time for love.

Sometimes I feel so scared when I decide to come out. It's just like the point of no return. What will be waiting for me behind these doors. But I am glad that I do. I can't tell my family this because it will be like a witch hunt. I will be burned at the stake for sure. It hurts me so bad that there is like a wall between my sexuality and my family. They are Catholic and Buddhist.

Anyway, my counselor suggests that I should see other people to get a feel of gay life. I dated but the only groups I seems to attract is 40's to 50's. My counselor is worried about me being taken advantage of. He suggests that I should date some one in my age group. 21 or 22. 29 at best. I don't know. Right now I am not looking for sex or hookup. I only feel that when I am horny. !oops!!oops!!oops! I am truly looking for love and romance. I am searching for my soulmate who I can connect to in a deeper level, who I can share my thoughts and love as well as my body with. I know he's out there. I won't stop searching. I don't drink so the bar is not one of my option.

I am searching for someone who knows the true meaning of love and respect, who will treat my right, loyal, and kind. I always imagine he's history buff and well-versed in English Lit. He likes to discuss WWII and philosophy. He's kind and volunteer every weekend to help the elderly in the neighbor. He has a rough teenager years but triumph at the end become stronger with each turn.

He has a dog and a cat as well as a fish tank that is full of tropical fish. I imagine we will have a picnic and while the dog goes out for the frisbee, he holds me in my arms and whisper in my ear the language of love. At night, we cuddle after watching the movie. All of the sudden I feel his soft lips against mine. His body is raging with passion and warmth. Time seems to stand still at that very moment.
 
WOW! You make me wish I were 30yr. younger!! Guess I was born too soon! #-o

I'm heartened that you have a good counselor! He seems to know what he's talking about! Definitely take his advice seriously! Sounds like he's "dead on"! ..|

I'm glad you found this forum/site! There are LOTS of Guys, "here", that I'm sure might prove to be a help to You! We have all been in the "same boat", at one time in our lives, and there are many different perspectives, that the Guys share, that might be helpful! :D

The main thing is to "hang in there"! Don't let your "fears" hold you back from fully exploring ALL of your options! Follow your Heart! And, trust that your Future will unfold for you as you hope that it will!! (!)

WELCOME to JUB!!! (group)

And, of course, no matter what ...

Keep smilin'!! :kiss:(*8*)
Chaz ;)
 
Thank you Chaz, greatly appreciated. :) :D. My counselor is awesome. He runs the gay support group here. He has been with his partner for 30 years. I really want to find my soul mate so I can fall in love like never before. I want to experience the feeling of love at first sight. I want to love him like no other before. I want to sing the song of my soul. I want him to hold me in my arm and tell me that he loves me. I have dreamed about him from the afar distance. I saw him with long dark brown hair and brown eyes. He is very handsome and muscular. His heart is tender and his soul is exquisite.
 
There's nothing wrong with looking for the fairy tale, so long as you realize that it's a fairy tale, and while you get moments of fairytale, no human can live up to Prince Charming 24/7. People have faults. Don't measure guys by an impossible standard.

Plus there's nothing wrong with having a little fun along the way. Exploration doesn't mean you have to give up looking for Mr. Right.
 
Oh, Wow! Just WOW! That's absolutely AWESOME! (!w!)

Keep your eye on your "prize"! That's definitely something worth searching for! ..|

I sincerely Hope that you achieve your goal! That's just so Romantic! But, trust me, that's not beyond realizing, especially considering your approach to what you truly want! (group)

I'm truly hoping that you get to experience that! And, no!, those aspirations are not too high! :D

Though I seem to be the only one answering you just now, the boards do get more active later in the day/evening. I'm sure more replies will come, given time. :cool:

Mean while ...

Keep smilin'!! :kiss:(*8*)
Chaz ;)
 
Congrats on your first post, Soulseeker! (*8*)

You sound like a real romantic.

That's very nice and all, and as Kyanimal says, it's good to have high aspirations.

But remember TX-Beau's advice too: we men on this planet are mere mortals. Don't expect perfection.
 
Thank you for commenting. I don't expect him to be perfect. I myself am full of flaws and imperfection that I have to work hard everyday to learn from my mistakes so that I can be better than yesterday. I don't expect him to be stunningly handsome, or a sex god. What I do expect is love. A love that I never felt so strongly before. A love that is shared beyond the measure of time and space. A love that is limitless and boundless. An immortal one. Every time I look at the moon, I saw his spirit watching over me. I hear his name whispering in the wind. All are so familiar but strange at the moment. :rolleyes:
 
I'm glad I found this forum/site Too! I'm in the "same boat. Love is pain but I know that person is out there 4 U, soulseeker and 4 all the people. I found my handsome and muscular, his heart is tender and his soul is exquisite But He's into another guy, So No always People have what we want, Just keep living and Love will be around.
 
Wow! How did you know that I have a big fish tank full of tropical fish?! Also, History, English Literature, and Philosophy are just my fields of interest.

love
 
You have been in the closet since you were 2??
 
No I don't think my standard is too high. It's pretty decent. Just don't limit yourself. If you want a nice, decent one, you will find him. If you want a hookup, u'll find one. I think the world is big enough to find a decent man for me to spend the rest of my life with.
 
Oh my! I'm am such a history buff during the whole Great War-WWII era, oh wait I rather "volunteer" pushing old people in to graves more, sorry! :badgrin:
 
Sure do what you like. :rolleyes: As for me, I believe true love is something special and rarely comes. Being in love with the right one is the most wonderful thing in the world.
 
He's kind and volunteer every weekend to help the elderly in the neighbor.(sic)

Okay.

So get out there and volunteer for something.

You just might meet him.
 
Aww, I hope you do too. While IGB and I are here haunting threads past...
This guy may be the man of your dreams, but make sure YOU'RE the love of your life. Finding this man should be an added bonus, not your sole impetus to be.
Be the best man you can be... not only for your soulmate, but for yourself.
By the way, check ummm.... college. Those guys seem to abound in grad school.
As for me... I hate love... but more power to you.
 
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