The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Confused by Parent's actions vs. words

M

Moi10

Virgin
Joined
Aug 12, 2005
Posts
48
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Ok. I've been out to my parents for just over two years now, the process was kinda messy but overall quick and painless. The whole awkward phone call ( i wrote a letter....only regret ever.) the whole WE still love you etc. but lately something has been bugging me

my parents and i never really talk about me being gay, which for me is totally normal and fine, i mean you don't hear heterosexuals and their parents talking about this and that about what it means to be straight, to me, it's a situation where you just know, and it's not a big deal because it shouldn't be. Thats how I've really assumed it's been between me and my parents, they know, they still love me, i'm the same kid i was before i told them and they are totally ok with it

however I've noticed that everytime that my parents, specifically my mother, brings it up, even when it's in our house just between me and her, her voice lowers, she leans in, and kind of darts her eyes back and forth and more or less whispers whatever she says to me, which is usually "does so and so know that you're gay?" It really comes across as she's trying to hide it, like it's some family secret, or that even though she says that she doesn't care, or in her words "i don't mind who you fuck, as long as theyre good looking, you're getting pleasure, and you're using a condom and not on E, whatever" (that was a VERY awkward silence afterwards). it seems slightly, im not sure if hypocritical would be the best way to put it, but along those lines, to say that then when she brings it up to me act like we're gossiping about what Jenny Humphrey is wearing.

I'm not sure if I should confront her about it, because I've learned from past experiences, if someone says something, take it as fact because otherwise you could end up making things worse. Am I looking too much into this? Or do I have a valid point? I'm not sure guys. help.


OH, btw. I'm in Paris until june. and they're back in the states. so anyway of talking to them has been through email.
 
YOUR PARENTS LOVE YOU!!! DUH...its just there learning what to do with a gay son...The world they grew up in and lived in for so long doesnt prepare you for what to do when your son is gay...

This is a very christian based nation and the only "acceptable" thing is to freak out...so give your parents some credit for trying to get into the swing of things.

And your mom may be whispering cos she doesnt want to embarress you. I mean she is a mom :)
 
P.S. when i came out i asked my mom how she would feel if i fell in love and she said to me.."i actually prefer you to be alone for the rest of your life."

So be grateful your mum wants you to be happy! ..|
 
Your parents accepted your sexuality. Remember how confused you were before you came to terms with it? Well they have accepted it but are still struggling with living with it every day. The next time mom whispers about your sexuality, very respectfully ask her to speak up and please don't whisper. Tell her everyone there (she and you) know about it so you can speak in normal tones. I'll bet she isn't aware of how she is reacting. Be sue you do it RESPECTFULLY. She is you mother.
 
If your parents are like most parents, they probably don't know anyone who is gay. And probablyall they know about being gay is what they see on the news when a story about a gay pride parade or a story on gay marriage showing two men kissing is featured.

There are things that you can do to educate them about gay people. You can introduce them to your gay friends (start with the well-behaved ones first). You can talk matter-of-factly about things going on in your life. You can use humor to point out some of their behaviors ("Mom, why are we whispering?").

Everything doesn't have to be a confrontation. Understand that they are learning and that in some ways, you are the adult who must do the teaching.
 
I have the same situation with my parents...they SAID they're ok with it and they treat me ok, but they've never really had to deal with it first-hand yet. I haven't brought anyone home yet and I don't live at home for example. We've got into a couple arguments about it...

Actually I just got suspicious because I was talking to my about Thanksgiving and she said, "well since you're coming home I'll just do thanksgiving at home." Which is weird...why not have it at our friends like usual? Oh well, we'll see how it goes.
 
Yeah, I agree with most of the people who have posted: it's just something that's new for them. If your mother's whispering bothers you (and I can't blame you a bit) just try to point out to her how absurd it is. She doesn't know how to deal with the situation and she can't unless you show her.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top