Dating and the two call rule

[rareboy]

Sure...sounds reasonable.

 

[Yeehaw]

I texted some guy once after hanging out a month ago, never got a response. Should I send him a msg online again?

 

[crzyrazn]

Given your post I can only assume you have someone calling you that you aren't interested in, and just wishing they would stop.

While your "rule" is fine and all, someone not picking up a ringing phone simply to avoid telling someone, "I had a great time but I decided on pursuing another dating option", or "thanks but no thanks" is chicken shit.

The sheer number of confused threads around this site tell me apparently how self-involved and utterly socially retarded an entire swath of men of the dating age are. For a generation that claims to be so adept at using communications technology, they sure are woefully inept in actually using the technology for anything that actually matters in life.

/rant

I'm not assuming guyinvantucky's situation or reason for sharing this little dating tip, and it's sound.

But I also agree with Ghost - Chicken shit.

 

[spencer]

The problem is when someone uses the rule for breaking up with someone. My friend broke up with his girlfriend of 2 years using the no call back rule. Yeah, pigs.

 

[Smitho]

Or date people that have enough bollocks to tell you on the phone or face to face they don't want to date any more.

 

[treanir]

I agree with the general idea here. Calling over and over again is annoying for him and embarrassing for you. But I do feel you're being far too specific about all this. I usually give it three tries (call/text/PM etc), or even four - does that make me desperate? Why the 48-hour window (with a grace period of another 48 hours)? I've been completely unavailable for more than four days quite often.

What I want to say is this: yes, by all means know when there won't be a second meeting. Don't keep trying if you know it won't work anyway. But if you attach hard-set rules to it, chances are you're missing out on some good guys. Just trust your social instincts, not a pre-determined, arbitrary 'rule'.

 

[rareboy]

Does anyone else have any first date scenario rules you wish everyone would live by?

Now this worries me.

If you want to keep it real, just relax and stop making up a whole lot of rules to govern things.

 

[new86]

Is it so hard, in place that counting the umber of calls, machine messages, texts and so on, just be honest and answer saying "well, thanks but no thanks?"

I did it; it was hard because i dind't want to hurt the other gay as he seemes really interested. But then I felt i did the right thing and guess what? sometimes i hear or see him and it is ok... so guys BE HONEST

 

[Lube]

Just. Answer. The. Damn. Phone.


People are not machines. There are no rules with people. Rules don't work. I had the hots for a young cub for over a year and we played this weird dance and he never returned calls and blah blah blah. It turns out he had the hots for me but either (a) wanted me to be the aggressor and make all the phone calls, or (b) was playing hard to get.

It didn't work out because I found somebody rational in the meantime. (But he's a hottie so I'd fuck him in a heartbeat if I broke up with my bf!).

You just can't predict people. We are strange creatures.