Dealing with issues?

[Dazedinreality]

So as of recently I've been dealing with depression. What's been causing it is the lack of "true" friends. So I've been feeling a bit lonely and stuck at home. I do have a boyfriend that I've been with for 1 1/2 years and I love him. The downside is he works Sunday-Thursday. The most inconvenient hours though. Sunday he works from 1-9 and M-Thu he works from 3pm-11pm so I rarely get to see him other then Saturday and SOME of Friday after I get off of work. I've tried asking friends to go out but it seems as if no one wants to do anything. I know I'm not a bad friend. They come to me when they need advice. I've spoken to my boyfriend about this and he tells me he understands where I'm coming from. He's told me that he has no issue with me going out and socializing with other people now that I've gotten my license. Thing is I'm a very shy person so I'm not exactly out there.

How do I approach this? Do I go out to a bar by myself? Should I make friends online first them meet them in person? I apologize if I'm in the wrong area for this discussion. Any and all advice is greatly appreciated.

 

[Dazedinreality]

29 views and not a single post. Thanks.

 

[looseliam]

I'm glad I'm not the only one awake in the wee small hours!

Anyhoo, on to you.

You most certainly can go out alone to the bars. Though, you admitted you're very shy, it may be a fun experience.

Meeting people online is okay, so I've heard. Perhaps there's an online social group with similar interests.

Are you in school? What's there to do where you live? Have you any hobbies?

And welcome to JUB! Don't let the views/answers throw you off. A lot of time people will read to see if they relate, but have nothing to offer. Plus, this place dies down around 10PM. This site is based in Canada and they all go to sleep early ;P

 

[rjmrjm21]

Ugh I wouldn't want to be in your position. That's just one of those things that is going to put your relationship to the test. Do you love the guy enough to stay together even if he's never home? People break up for that reason, all the time.

 

[evanrick]

i would ask what is causing what?
are you depressed because you dont have enough friends or
do you not have enough friends because you are depressed?
when did you start feeling this way?
you do not want your depression getting worse, and you need to tell someone, like your parents or your partner what you are feeling.
if you are just feeling lonely and that is making you sad, i would start by talking with people who share similar interests with you.

 

[Seasoned]

I think you are going to need to take some risks and try joining some groups--gay, preferably, because meeting guys one on one in bars or online while hubby is at work sounds like too much temptation. Had I not been away last weekend I would have gotten to your thread sooner.

 

[Smitho]

You need some area of your life, out and about when your BF is working, don't just be sitting at home waiting. Gym, sports, groups, hobbies, night school, loads of choices to pick from. Depends what sort of person you are. This then feeds into having / making friends and a social life. Your BF seems to understand, and it would be a bit much for him to expect you to just wait at home for him, so find something that interests you and sign up!