Depression

[dilbhoy]

Hey I normally just lurk but feel I need to seek advice and am looking for some help. Sorry if this is long! Now there's a good chance I'm over-analyzing things and I don't want to come across as belittling an illness! I would just like opinions on whether seeing a doctor would help me as I'm worried I would be wasting their time.
Now a little background info. I've never been comfortable with my sexuality (came out when I was 19, now coming up for 29) and when I told my parents they asked if it was because I was abused, (apparently I told my nan I was, by the guy who used to take me camping and fishing between the ages of 5 and 6) now I don't remember so can't say if this is true or not!
When I was first coming to terms with my sexuality I attempted suicide a couple of times but having rushed my sister to hospital after her attempted overdose and seeing my parents reaction I would never attempt it again! Thing is I'm drinking between 3-4 bottles of a vodka a week and I've isolated myself in my room! If it wasn't for work I wouldn't even get out of bed! Don't want to let people down, I guess. Now another problem is sex! I can get an erection on my own and orgasm but as soon as another guy touches me I lose my erection! There's a sort of disgust on my part! I used to go cruising and I would suck the guy off or give them a handjob but would never let them touch me! I have never came in front of anyone! Has anyone else experienced this? Emotionally I've closed everyone out but I know how bad I got the last time and I want to open up and meet someone but just feel its' pointless to expect patience from guys that are looking for sex on the first meet!
Wow that took a while so thanks if you read through to the end, any advice is welcome x+

 

[seven_sins]

The first thing you need to do is get off the alcohol. Man, it is going to do you in real bad if you don't get a handle on it. You didn't say what size bottles you are consuming, but 3 to 4 bottles of vodka a week is way too much. Even small amounts of alcohol can cause erectile dysfunction. Yours may clear up if you get off the bottle. If it doesn't, see a urologist. Something as simple as a prescription for Viagra may be the solution. Don't be embarrassed, they see people like you every day. It is what they do. At any rate, you need to get off the alcohol. If you are not working out, get out of your room and start getting some exercise. Walk, run, join a gym, lift some weight. Exercise can do wonders for erectile dysfunction.

 

[Nomenclature]

Well, if you're depressed, alcohol is a depressant, meaning it'll just exacerbate your problems.

Honestly, it sounds to me like you would really benefit from some counseling. If possible, see if you can find a therapist.

 

[torontoboy92]

Well, if you're depressed, alcohol is a depressant, meaning it'll just exacerbate your problems.

Honestly, it sounds to me like you would really benefit from some counseling. If possible, see if you can find a therapist.

Nomenclature is right, Alcohol is a depressant, and If you do see a doctor and they prescribed you anti-depressants (this is getting way ahead of my point) drinking is not going to help you because you shouldn't drink and take anti-deps. My advise is slowly reduce your drinking until it is at a "social" level. As for a doctor, talk to your family doctor or a therapist. It may be something that you can resolve by talking it out. Whether you see a doctor or not after these responses is up to you, but the amount of alcohol you are consuming can not be doing wonders for your liver and mood... At least keep that in mind...

 

[KaraBulut]

It sounds like you have depression and that you're self-medicating with alcohol.

Given the amount of alcohol that you're drinking, you're going to have to go through a detox. This is not something that you want to try on your own- you should do it under medical care.

Your first stop is your physician. Tell him about your symptoms and how much alcohol that you've been drinking. The first step will be to get you off alcohol and the second step will be to treat the underlying depression.

Good luck.

 

[TomahawkEagle]

Get off that booze, then see your doctor for treatment options. These can range from medication to a referral to a psychologist.

I can see where you're at because I'm still in the closet to my parents, only came out when I was 23 and I've just turned 29.

 

[lamiejamie]

We have alot of similarities and have almost the same story, except for the drinking. I agree with what everyone else has said about quitting.

If that doesn't do it, then I think we are going to have to learn how to love ourselves. It's a grueling, hard process. Sex so far has been horrrrible for me. Seems like the people who enjoy it are the ones with confidence and pride in themselves. I don't like that word, pride... I don't mean arrogance. Simply having positive thoughts about ourselves is something we need to work on. Good luck!