The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Did I get used?

Welcome to JUB. Try to reframe this if you can just for your own peace of mind. I don't mean this to sound cold or crude, but most sex involves use to some degree of another person. If I want a blow job I need a mouth; a fuck needs an ass.

It seems as if this guy was satisfied with a one time experience and you are not. Don't tap into the being used thing because it will affect your self esteem. For some people it's all about the dance or some spark fails to ignite. Maybe he'd prefer a bad boy, dirty talker, a screamer, etc. Don't try to figure it out. It will make you crazy. There will be a time the same thing will happen in reverse and you'll see how difficult it is to honestly say what's really going on.

I might text the guy one last time letting him know you had a great time and would like to see him again. Ask him if he dates or just mostly hooks up and then drop it and let him go.

It could be that you are much too sensitive for him. We call it making love, so sometimes we expect to fall in love, but in reality it was a couple of animals in heat.

Good luck to you as you navigate the different manifestations of human sexuality. Don't turn cold just because some others are.
 
sounds like it, so don't dwell on on it. Just move on and see if the next guy has better intensions.
 
soreknees, I have to hand it to you- you present the most realistic perspective in a very kind way so many times. I agree completely.

DominiDiaz: you absolutely will be the other person some time. Not that it would even mean that you are "using" anybody. Just that what you thought was there, or what you were looking for, hasn't come about. You'll find someone else out there who wants to spend time with you, and it will be great. Maybe that'll be next week, maybe that'll be in 6 months, no one knows for sure. Just be patient, and keep moving forward.
 
think of it like this - you were hot enough that you beat out all his other options. Its a compliment really.

Some people just want the thrill of a good fuck, others want more. And still the predominant number of guys out there have no idea what they want

consider the good time you had and move on
 
Don't think of it as being used, really.

I've been where you are now, many times, and I've been that other guy too.

Sometimes there where things, who knows what, that I didn't offer to him, or that he wanted in a partner that he discovered I didn't have.

More than once I've had hot sex with a guy and thought once was enough afterwards because of the sounds he made, his pure and boring passiveness, or bad breath, refusal to kiss, even that he wouldn't take his socks off, etc..

Don't analyze it, just move on...
 
If you want to avoid situations like this further in the future, you need to get to know the guy more. Develop a chemistry of personality, not just of body.

It's happened to me a few times so I understand what you're saying here. The better you know someone, the less likely it is to happen in the future.
 
Not enough info. Sounds committed though...to someone else.
 
You should take another view on this encounter. You had some HOTT sex which you apparently enjoyed. That's great!

Now, bass in the afterglow then go out to find your next conquest. If this guy is interested, he will come back around.
 
I doubt he simply strung you along for a long time just to get into your pants - if he just wanted some action, there are usually a lot quicker places to go. I'm guessing that he did like you, and he probably enjoyed the sex, too. But once it was done, his ardor cooled - it does happen. And he apparently isn't interested in a return encounter. Accept it, move on.

Lex
 
DominiDiaz said:
The sex was HOTT to me, but as soon as he came he became distant. I don't know if he just wanted sex or if maybe something else is going on with him
Click to expand...

You may never know for sure unless there's an opportunity to talk.

People are just looking for different things. Some want companionship. Some want love. Some want to get off.

Part of the search is finding a person who wants the same things that you do.

It sounds like this time you found someone but he didn't want the same things that you want. So, continue your search and get to know the person a little better before you get emotionally or physically involved.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top