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does it ever happen, an apology and a mulligan?

S

spencer

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Justin gave me closure this weekend. He told me it was over, kissed me, told me he loved me and that was that. Man, I balled, but I got what I wanted, so I can begin to move on. I was actually content since then.

Today, I got a text message from someone I dated earlier this year, Brett. Brett is a total sweetheart, successful, great looking, super fit, morals everything.

Backstory: Earlier this year, we dated and he totally pushed me away and I never got why.

We went out tonight and he totally apologized. He said he threw away a great guy, a guy he was attracted to, etc. I actually never knew, I figure he was just entertaining my advances in the past. And I figured he was too good for me (problem). He talked about how much of a jerk he was and it was because he wasn't emotionally available. He was trying at the time but he just couldn't move on from his ex and was mean.

Well, I was flabbergasted. You always think, some day this guy is gonna realize what he lost, blah blah. But Brett actually did realize it and did something about it. crazy

So what happens if you don't think your good enough for someone when you are and you even know you are. I think even that maybe I'm not good enough for a successful relationship. I'm going to never let that out ever, but I think in the back of my mind that's how I feel.

Well I'm gonna take it slow, cause I'm not convinced yet. The date went very well. The kiss at the end was great. I think I'm still in shock. But other than that, what to do, what to do.

Can anyone help me with the self esteem problem. I think it has to do with not being attracted to my "look". If that makes any sense. I also think that nice guys don't get much so if he likes that I'm nice, then that's not good. :confused:
 
Yeah, don't punish a guy for being attracted to you or your look!
 
Have you ever looked into a mirror and just said, "Fucking god! I'm handsome!" If you haven't then you should. If you're having problem with your self image then just improve it. Tell yourself what you want to be. Self projection is a great thing. You are allowed to lie to yourself. When you tell a lie long enough, it will come true. So if you tell yourself that you're handsome then you will be.

And the thing with this guy...don't ruin it. If he likes you then just takes his words for it. NO need to question his attraction. People like different things, he could be attracted to you for many many reasons.
 
I once realized something that helped with my self esteem. A lot of the hottest couples are made up of two guys with completely different looks.

You don't need a pair of body builders or a pair of surfers or a pair of ivy league intellectuals or a pair of garage-mechanic-classic-car-enthusiasts. Mix things up a bit.

I realized that I would not have to look like my boyfriend, and whoever that would be, it would probably look better if we complimented each other rather than just duplicated the same look.

Everything from body type to image, there is a whole range of combinations where two different people look hot together, and are hot together.
 
There's nothing wrong with being nice! It's a very desirable quality.

Just don't be too nice--don't be a doormat. That's not desirable.
 
Thinking over our last encounter, it seems interesting how much he rememberd (obsessed?) with over the summer summer. He saved the 10% off fortune cookie from on of our outings and showed it to me. He said he was up by my house (good memory). It sounds like something I totally would do, it's sweet to me.

He's been doing a ton of thinking this summer and just came to the realization that I was a good guy and that he let a good one get away.

Anyway, I'm out of town and we won't get to see each other for a few weeks. I've not texted him and I'm going to maybe call him once to say hello or to make plans when I get back and that's it. :)

I think the best part is we share the same religion. His ex was atheist and sprituality is important to him.

Wish me luck.
 
good luck. Should you play hard to get? maybe :D lol.
 
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