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End of a five year relationship..

A

akahia

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My boyfriend of five years and I broke up tonight.. he calls me his best friend, and he says he would do anything for me and he thinks we should separate because he feels our friendship is at risk. I know he's right, we haven't had a good day in the past six months, but it doesn't make this any easier. I'm not mad at him, he isn't mad at me, and I thoroughly believe we will remain the best of friends but... this is so hard :(

I need a shoulder to cry on...
 
It sucks when relationships end. Make sure you take care of yourself first and foremost. I hope you feel better!
 
It'll be all right. Here, have a good cry on my shoulder. (*8*)
 
I'm here for you anytime you need that shoulder. It hurts bad. I hate hearing things like this. I always wonder at the cause and whether couple's counseling was tried. I know a lot of people do it, but I really don't get the part about staying friends. Five years is a long time.

My partner and I thought we were breaking up after 4 years. We had lost the spark everywhere in our lives except the bedroom. I moved to take a job and we saw each other almost every weekend. We both liked the idea of being safe bareback partners and made the committment that we'd have safe sex everywhere else. Our emotional connection coupled with the best sex kept us together during that period.

So, now, 23 years after our "break-up," I'm home from the hospital recovering from prostate surgery and the same man is providing care and support. When I hold him I hold him tighter than I would had we not had our rough patches.

All I'm saying is that relationships require some work and they are worth fighting for. If on the other hand your troubles beginning six months ago were due to your partner grooming himself for his next relationship I'd say skip both the rekindling and the friendship.
 
I'm really sorry, it's always quite sad to read that. I hope you feel better soon and it's good you guys ended the relationships in good terms.

I'll be around if you need somebody to talk to(*8*)
 
I'm sorry to hear this. You're right, even though both of you realize you want to be best friends, instead, doesn't make it much easier.

All the best. (*8*)
 
It's good that you feel like you are/were friends. One of the real challenges in breakups is keeping your own sanity and building enough distance to function. Anger often makes it easier, but can be pretty toxic for you, too.

I will hope you can find the energy and direction to keep moving. Do you have a network of friends who can drag you out and keep you from a spiral?
 
It will take time. And it will hurt at first.
Feel free to talk to us anytime, we're here for you to vent, cry and anything else.
 
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