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Everyone else is doing it: Sushi Counter Guy

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spencer

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So at a Houston grocery store, there's this Sushi counter and this early 20yo, Japanese dude (very tall, American born, no accent) that was giving away free Unagi samples.

I'm a sample whore so I took one and he asked me where I got my shorts. I told him H&M and he says, what's and H&M? I said, it's European based clothing store, they don't have it in Houston yet (at least not on this side of Houston). I was surprised and pleased about the flattery from my shorts and walked away and told my brother what had happened.

My brother said that was the gayest thing he ever heard. I told my brother, no it wasn't he wanted to konw. He was like, he was hitting on you. I said now he wasn't, I go no gay vibe from talking to him nothing. My brother kept on insiting that no straight man would ever ask another guy where they got an article of clothing. My sister in law chimed in and said, girls do that ALL the time.

Here I was just flattered someone liked my clothing. But my brother is weirded out, lol.

Thoughts?
 
well, I wouldn't call it hitting - it really depends on his intention i suppose.
Sometimes I would compliment a friend or a newly acquainted person's outfit or piece of clothing but just because i really thought it looked cool. No hidden agendas whatsoever.

Then again, he might have just been hitting on you, or trying to spark a conversation. You could've thrown something in the conversation that would reveal a little bit more about him. You could always go back ;)
 
lurchinurchin said:
Just idle conversation - nothing sexual there!! Now if he asked you what underwear you have under the shorts then yeah maybe. Blaaaaand!
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My brother was just saying though, that no straight guy would ask this ever. That was the question basically.
 
some straight guys are more aware of that sort of thing and others just don't care how it might come across. i guess it depends on the guy. where they live/who they hang out with might also be a factor

there's no telling if that guy was hitting on you from your post. i think it all depends on how he said it
 
I think your bro suffers from homosexual panic. It is sad really that straight men have to be so careful to not do things to sound or seem gay. I dont think that guy was hitting on you at all. Your brother though, might have some issues. Does he even know you are gay or bi?
 
aijalon18 said:
I think your bro suffers from homosexual panic. It is sad really that straight men have to be so careful to not do things to sound or seem gay. I dont think that guy was hitting on you at all. Your brother though, might have some issues. Does he even know you are gay or bi?
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yeah he knows and yeah he has homosexual panic. he has gay friends and a gay guy even worked for him, but he doesn't like his little bro being gay.
 
I'm gay and if I asked another gay guy where he got his clothes from, I wouldn't really say I'm hitting on them. So if this guy was gay or not I don't think he was hitting on you.
 
spencer said:
yeah he knows and yeah he has homosexual panic. he has gay friends and a gay guy even worked for him, but he doesn't like his little bro being gay.
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I see. Well your sex life is none of his business just like you dont need to be in his. It seems like he is insecure with his own sexuality ( I dont mean he's gay at all) and his making you insecure with yours. He doesnt know what he is talking about. He is not the authority on what straight guys would and wouldnt do.

It sounds like homophobia in it's truest form. He is actually "scared" of looking gay. A lot of what you say reminds me of a friend of mine. I may be completely wrong but it seems like you are one of those people that still looks up to your brother and in some ways desires his approval. If so, you have to get out of that because in terms of sexuality, he is clueless and not someone you should look up to. His sex/relationship life, which I'm sure you dont particularly want to think about, prolly suffers from his own insecurity. If he was content and occupied with his sex life he wouldnt have such an interest in yours.
 
It was a compliment.

I went to the South this summer, and as I was walking into a hotel, a guy told me, "Hey, that's a pretty fly shirt you got there." I said thanks, and it really made my day. :)

I go to church where I receive and give many compliments for what my friends wear. It is not gay. I agree with aijalon18, that your brother has sexual insecurities about how men should behave with each other. It doesn't mean your brother is gay; however, you should spend some time educating your sibling as that is not a healthy stereotype to have. He shouldn't feel paranoid that another man is giving him a compliment. Rather, he should be flattered by his good taste in clothing.
 
Well, I can see where this is the kind of issue that could be perplexing although I'm not exactly seeing how it is a Coming Out and Relationships issue necessarily...unless you are unable to explain to your brother that you don't really care if it weirds him out or not. It is his issue, not yours.

But none of us know your brother. Or will spend any time with him. So our 'thoughts' here are merely idle speculation and opinions based on experience or lack of experience with having people ask us where we get our clothes.

I'm thinking that HotTopics would be the perfect place to get more input on this question.
 
Yeah, your brother is just generalizing. I've met many metrosexuals who have asked that. He's looking too deeply into the gay thing.
 
rareboy said:
Well, I can see where this is the kind of issue that could be perplexing although I'm not exactly seeing how it is a Coming Out and Relationships issue necessarily...unless you are unable to explain to your brother that you don't really care if it weirds him out or not. It is his issue, not yours.

But none of us know your brother. Or will spend any time with him. So our 'thoughts' here are merely idle speculation and opinions based on experience or lack of experience with having people ask us where we get our clothes.

I'm thinking that HotTopics would be the perfect place to get more input on this question.
Click to expand...

You are correct in that they don't align with CO, R, & BT. But I thought you would get the location connection between the other grocery store, deli counter, bar tender and other workers.

Besides my current life situation fits into this forum. I'm an active participant with both questions and advice.
 
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