Feeling after thoughts of gay sex

[arpeggi]

I often thought the same things you did after watching gay porn and masturbating, the feelings of disgust. Mostly, I think I was afraid of it making me more and more willing to act out on the desires I had. It did, of course, but that was a good thing. I think I initially had the idea that if I just got it out of my system it would go away. Well that didn't happen because I enjoyed it so much more than being straight. Being with a man felt natural to me. I found a level of comfort I never had with a woman intimately.

If/when you do something with another guy, sure you'll be nervous at first. You will also be so turned on so much that once it starts you will realize how much you're enjoying it. I wouldn't worry so much about freaking out. It might be best to start with just making out or jerking off with another guy first. After that, you'll want to do a bit more next time. If anything, you'll find something more about yourself and have a new experience to boot.

There is nothing disgusting or shameful about it.

 

[cocksucker4use]

LIke most guys, once you ejaculate all the heightened excitement and sexual drive disappears. If we are with a loving partner, maybe there is a feeling of euphoria and well being. Gay, straight, kink, whatever, none of us chooses what attracts us sexually. It just IS. We may modify it because of circumstance, but certainly when we are alone and masturbating or selecting our online porn in private, we go with what the real deal is. It may not synch with our self concept, or once we get off, we ask ourselves why was I so hot for that? It is a normal reaction. However, your feelings are not going to go away, and one day you will look back and wonder what the big deal was. However, if you keep feeling that way and are unable to enjoy sex because of it, well, you should get professional help.

 

[PSCGuy]

Curious,

he issues you seem to be having are very similar to ones I had when I was younger (ie preteen), before I became comfortable personally with the idea that I was gay. If you're at the beginning stages of coming to terms with your sexuality, this is perfectly normal. Speaking from my experience, I doubt there's anything you can do to alleviate the problem other than wait. What you're experiencing (IMO) is a part of your subconscious.

You have nothing to be ashamed of, and you need to remind yourself of that. If you do find yourself with a guy, start slowly, because straight people are nervous in their first relationships too, and nothing should be different for you. Just know that there is nothing to be ashamed of. You are as God made you, if you're a believer and all. Time will pass, and you will become more comfortable with who you are. But you're not alone in what you're going through.

 

[Quality Street]

I'm 20 and that first post sums me up perfectly. After one of my 'experiences,' I saw quite an obviously gay guy and it actually made me feel sick; a few hours later I was fantasising again.

 

[AsianDream]

I'm 20 and that first post sums me up perfectly. After one of my 'experiences,' I saw quite an obviously gay guy and it actually made me feel sick; a few hours later I was fantasising again.

I know many guys who are gay or BI that had issues because they believed how they felt was bad or perverted.

Some I’ve talked to about this – and often it wasn’t really their parents or teachers they learned this attitude from – but from their peer group and friends – especially during their teens when most people are desperate to be accepted and “fit-in”.

Some made a determined effort to suppress this – often marrying and having kids – and only later (often in their 40’s) when they were more comfortable with themselves actually exploring this part of their sexuality. I’d also guess there must be a lot of people who had desires for the same sex when younger for whom these don’t return.

If you do explore your attraction to other guys – it may well make your life turn out to be different than you planned – but I’d (obviously) say better. If you decide that sex with other guys is so disgusting you’d never want to really do it – the best thing is to avoid all temptation – especially keep clear of gay porn and gay sites.

One tip I heard from someone who is STR8 but admits to “gay” urges - is to masturbate very regularly (so you never feel too horny) and always with naked female pictures or STR8 porn (preferably where the guys genitals aren’t visible). I’d guess also to have as much sex with women as possible - that way your real experiences will become more important to you than fantasies.

 

[Something Else]

Well there's a word to describe the experience you're going through: La petite mort

However, that word is for ALL post sexual experiences; not specifically for feelings after a man on man experience.

Personally, my thought with what your dealing with delves more with your comfortability with your sexuality. I'm not sure if you've assigned any right or wrong values to what you feel; or believe that you are doing something bad by being honest with your feelings and sexual attractions.

As a late bloomer, I can attest it took time to be 'okay' with being turned on with a guy. And feeling that it's more than natural to have these desires, because these desires are genuine and sincere not manufactured.

So if you're dealing with another guy (wasn't able to make out reading your original post) maybe develop some trust, connect and a bond that extends beyond just the sexual attraction.

It helps when you experience that la petite mort moment. Instead of feeling awkward about what just happened, you can still connect on the other things that have always bonded you beyond the obvious physical attractions.

Anyways, just a thought man.

 

[conrad]

Friend, our Creator gave us those very strong animal urges which seem so strong as we are coming into the realization that we are sexual beings. I have always been grateful for that heritage, but I confess that sometimes the urges are so strong that even a quick session with hand and cock joined for a quick release did not really satisfy.

We are on the road to sexual maturity when we begin to realize that it really takes two. Most of us are thoroughly programmed by our culture to think in terms of boy-girl sex. But, some of us are fortunate in finding a friend of the same sex as ourselves. Some of us actually discover in real experience that there are loving and lovable males as well as females. At times that bond between two guys can become so strong that they both want and need sexual activity to express the affection they have for each other. That was my experience; and, I assure you, my friend, my teen lover and I never had a moment of regret or disgust at what we experienced. It confirmed the bond that existed between us and frankly, in the afterglow of that first time of sexual communion we agreed that it was natural and right and we looked forward to many more such sessions.

Absent that loving bond, the two of us might have felt guilty at having used each other to "get off". My feeling is that if you don't feel good about the sex afterwards don't go back for the the same kind of experience.

Genuine love between persons still provides the best foundation for the kind of sex that satisfies and much more.

 

[bhandsome]

Hi all. Just started posting here, but wanted to see if anyone is in the same predicament as me. I've been very curious for some time now and get into these moods where I really want to mess around with a guy. I get so into it, but once I ejaculate I get a strong feeling of disgust with what I've done. I feel like I shouldn't have done it and that it is wrong. However, a short bit later I am back to fantasizing about men again.

In the past I have searched for people with similar issues on Google. Most people mention that most of us have these preconceived thoughts about sex with another man based on how our society is. I'm not sure what to believe or where to really go from here. I don't want to try something with a guy and then freak out afterwards. Any thoughts on the matter? Thanks.

When I read this I thought to myself, "this is exactly what i'm going through." i'm trying to be comfortable with who i am and all i can say is it takes time and patience, and patience is hard for me to accept. society has really messed up the perception of gay people and twisted religious beliefs make it worse but what can you do.

i am a christian that believes God created me for who I am and he knows what lifestyle i will live in the future so there is no need to worry because he gives us choices to live our life by and it's up to us to do what's best for us. honestly i don't know what life i will lead by the only thing i can do is live each day to the fullest. sorry about getting into religion but i felt is was necessary...

 

[AlmondMilk]

Maybe if you have sex with a guy you care about instead of a hook up you might not feel disgusted after sex?

 

[leomendez93]

Give yourself sometime to work this through. Do not feel pressure that you have to fit into a mold of sexual practices. You are dealing with your human, flesh, emotional side. One thing I know: once I did it, it has been hard to stop doing it. It calls for control but oh well, so does everything else.

 

[sktguy]

Friend, our Creator gave us those very strong animal urges which seem so strong as we are coming into the realization that we are sexual beings. I have always been grateful for that heritage, but I confess that sometimes the urges are so strong that even a quick session with hand and cock joined for a quick release did not really satisfy.

We are on the road to sexual maturity when we begin to realize that it really takes two. Most of us are thoroughly programmed by our culture to think in terms of boy-girl sex. But, some of us are fortunate in finding a friend of the same sex as ourselves. Some of us actually discover in real experience that there are loving and lovable males as well as females. At times that bond between two guys can become so strong that they both want and need sexual activity to express the affection they have for each other. That was my experience; and, I assure you, my friend, my teen lover and I never had a moment of regret or disgust at what we experienced. It confirmed the bond that existed between us and frankly, in the afterglow of that first time of sexual communion we agreed that it was natural and right and we looked forward to many more such sessions.

SIZE=5]Absent that loving bond, the two of us might have felt guilty at having used each other to "get off". My feeling is that if you don't feel good about the sex afterwards don't go back for the the same kind of experience. [/SIZE]

Genuine love between persons still provides the best foundation for the kind of sex that satisfies and much more.

On the other hand, a hot, sweaty f#ck with a total stranger can be very fulfilling too.

 

[Pablo1990]

Mate I know exactly how you feel! I've even been sick because of the disgust I've felt after having sex; I've only had sex with 2 guys and both times
Ive felt ill, but im so confused because of society and my family ect...you're not the only one mate,
If u wanna talk, let me know, hopfully we can help eachother out