The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Finally Did It!

PSCGuy

PSCGuy

Porn Star
Joined
Oct 19, 2007
Posts
433
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Philadelphia
:)

I just came out to one of my good friends at school, and it's the first time I told anyone. I never thought that he'd have a problem with it, so I wasn't looking forward to that, but he was the first person I ever came out too... and I think it was the first time I ever said "I'm gay" out loud.

He told me he actually suspected it, and that it wasn't really surprising. I don't give off a 'gay vibe' apparently, but if you know me personally it's not that surprising. Whatever.

Anyway, I don't have a lot of words to describe it right now, but I'm just full of mixed feelings about telling someone. I mean, it's not like I've ever even been with a guy, so there's a little bit of "Am I really?" sentiment on my part.

But I wanted to make sure to make a post here, since I've read about so many other guys coming out. I wanted to join the club. :)
 
well welcome to the club!

but more importantly, congratulations on taking that big step in a great wide world! :)
 
PSCGuy said:
He told me he actually suspected it, and that it wasn't really surprising. I don't give off a 'gay vibe' apparently, but if you know me personally it's not that surprising. Whatever.
Click to expand...
Every closeted guy thinks that "no one knows" and so they stay in the closet.

But, as you found out, everybody knows (or at least suspects). You're not fooling anyone, no matter how straight-acting you are.

In any case, CONGRATULATIONS and welcome to the club.:D
 
Welcome PSC... leave your handbag at the door and come on in!!!

Seriously mate... nice going and congrats on the first step! It can come with a few mixed emotions the first time but in a very short while you'll be grateful you told your friend.

And I'm sure the next ones you tell will be just as accepting too!
 
PSCGuy said:
I knew I wasn't fooling anyone. But it's still strange to hear it.
Click to expand...

And why would or should you fool anyone?

Being gay is not particularly unique- no more unique than having red hair or voting for Ralph Nader or liking broccoli. These are all things that not in the mainstream. But they're just another set of traits about a person that makes them who they are.

Congratulations on coming out and congratulations on being out.
 
Congratulations, PSCGuy! You took a big and brave step and I'm glad it went so well! Yeah, it does take a few days to get used to the idea that you actually told someone and that they know something so personal about you. But, you'll be glad you did and I hope future comings-out go just as well! :=D:
 
Lube said:
Every closeted guy thinks that "no one knows" and so they stay in the closet.

But, as you found out, everybody knows (or at least suspects). You're not fooling anyone, no matter how straight-acting you are.
Click to expand...

Are you sure about that, Lube? How do you know they are like monday morning quarterback on this? I fail to see how people can tell if someone is really "straight-acting".
 
p700granat said:
Are you sure about that, Lube? How do you know they are like monday morning quarterback on this? I fail to see how people can tell if someone is really "straight-acting".
Click to expand...
It has nothing to do with how you act. It has to do with what you talk to people about.

What a lot of guys fail to recognize is that people gossip all the time. Not necessarily mean & ugly gossip--just chatting about other people.

If you never tell anyone about your personal life or dating or whatever, HUGE RED FLAGS GO UP.

Why is he not revealing anything? Well he must be:
  1. A child molester
  2. Into bizarre kink
  3. Asexual
  4. Gay
Normal, psychologically healthy human beings chat about their lives. Not necessarily in great detail (you don't talk about what you do literally in bed) but about friends, neighbors, family, dates, partners. If any of those people are missing from your stories, people immediately get suspicious.

I mean, don't you?
 
Lube said:
Every closeted guy thinks that "no one knows" and so they stay in the closet.

But, as you found out, everybody knows (or at least suspects). You're not fooling anyone, no matter how straight-acting you are.

In any case, CONGRATULATIONS and welcome to the club.:D
Click to expand...

I guess I'm special or something because everyone was surprised as fuck when they found out I was gay, with an exception of maybe one or two people. :confused:

Congrats on coming out dude. Definitely one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It was actually easier telling my parents than it was my best friend for the first time.
 
Fat Tom said:
I guess I'm special or something because everyone was surprised as fuck when they found out I was gay, with an exception of maybe one or two people. :confused:
Click to expand...
So you've never lied to anyone and told them how delicious their cooking was? ;)

Seriously, though, there's no one thing that tips people off that you're gay. And some guys hide it better than others. But have you really had friends/coworkers/schoolmates that you've had for a year or more and to whom you've never talked about your private life, and they were genuinely surprised when you came out? Did they say anything when you did come out--like "I was wondering why you never talked about what you did on weekends"?
 
>>>But, as you found out, everybody knows (or at least suspects). You're not fooling anyone, no matter how straight-acting you are.

I shocked pretty much everybody when I came out - my parents, my brother, my friends. My sister says she had some suspicions, but that's it.

I should point out that I'm not PROUD of this fact. Being "straight-acting" isn't anything to be proud of. It's just how I am. :)

Lex
 
Lube said:
So you've never lied to anyone and told them how delicious their cooking was? ;)

Seriously, though, there's no one thing that tips people off that you're gay. And some guys hide it better than others. But have you really had friends/coworkers/schoolmates that you've had for a year or more and to whom you've never talked about your private life, and they were genuinely surprised when you came out? Did they say anything when you did come out--like "I was wondering why you never talked about what you did on weekends"?
Click to expand...

Hahaha. But yeah, my close circle of friends is comprised of people I've known for about 5 years or more. I could and still will say a girl is cute, so maybe that's what threw them off. I would also say that I would like a relationship sometimes, but a lot of the times I would say fuck relationships. Why? Because whenever one of my friends was in a relationship they almost dropped off the face of the earth. I hate that, and they understood that. I don't know, but they were all (for the most part), genuinely surprised to find out that I was gay.
 
OK, so the 5 people on earth who can pull this off replied to this thread. ;) And I suppose that it helps that both of you are bear-ish (although I don't know what G-Lex looked like 20 years ago).

It's just that I meet so many guys who say they are "butch" and in some ways they are--their voice or their muscles or their clothing or whatever--but rarely does it all fit together. But there are almost always clues--and like I said, it's not just straight-acting, it's clues (or non-clues) about what you did over the weekend.

I'll stop now. My point isn't to prove one individual person right or wrong--rather, it's to get guys in the closet to think about their actions, and all the various clues they give off--usually unintentionally.

Because if you're spending all this extra effort to remain closeted--and yet many (most?) people already suspect you're gay--what are you accomplishing?

Not much.
 
PSC, I know exactly what you mean. I came out for the first time on March 17th (that luck of the irish did me some good lol) and, once I did it, started freaking out and felt really unsure, so I called another friend of mine (who is gay) and told him! Next day, the shock was completely gone and it felt like any other day.

I've not told anyone else yet... We'll see how that goes.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top