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First time and couldn't get it in!

R

RobUK2

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Hi all!

I'm not sure, first of all, if this is the right section to post this in, but it's definitely not gay porn related, and although I'm bi, it's not a specifically 'bi' issue, and it's not really a 'relationship' question... Oh well, I guess one of the mods will move it if necessary...

I read the sticky "All About Ass" on here, and there was a link to a thread called "Topped for the first time...I had a hard time getting my dick inside him" which sounded perfect, but the link didn't work...

Anyway, back to business. I was playing around with this guy the night before last, neither of us had tried anal before (either way), so we decided to give it a go. We decided that I'd be the top, as I eat a very high protein diet because I lift weights, so I'm prone to constipation and the odd hemorrhoid, so we thought it'd be more comfortable for me to penetrate him.

Now, I'm not the most well-endowed man in the universe, but I'm probably still a bit above average, but we could not get me in him AT ALL! We tried various amounts of lube, me using my hand to help guide me in, him using his hand to guide me on, any position we could think, me rimming him first to try and loosen him up, NOTHING WORKED! In the end, we just gave up and sucked each other off.

What can we do to help make it happen? I know I've done stretching exercises with my fingers on myself before, don't know if he's done the same.... Should I just like buy him a Dildo (albeit a small one - I don't want him to be expecting too much from me!) and just ask him to practice with it? What can I do as the top?

Any help appreciated!
:help:
 
i wish i could give you advice, as im sure others here can, but thank you for posting this in the right forum.
 
Looks like your thread was moved to the safe confines of H&W.

Name me something you did perfectly the first time out of the chute (no pun intended)...
  • Riding a bicycle?
  • Throwing a ball?
  • Typing a letter?
Yet everyone believes they're supposed to be born to fuck and get it perfect on the first time. :)

There are other threads in the sticky about techniques for those who are new to anal (we're working on getting the links working again). The bottom line (no pun intended again) is that it takes some time to learn to relax and enjoy it. And practice, like so many other things in life, makes perfect.
 
It seems the bottom couldn't relax to allow your cock in. Maybe he should practice alone with a Dildo and/or butt plug; that is what I did.
 
Thanks for the tips guys! Some of you are confirming what I thought (see below), but I honestly didn't think about the "try pushing out instead of clamping down" thing - suppose that makes sense - if you need the loo and hold it in, you push down, to go, you push out...

RobUK2 said:
What can we do to help make it happen? I know I've done stretching exercises with my fingers on myself before, don't know if he's done the same.... Should I just like buy him a dildo (albeit a small one - I don't want him to be expecting too much from me!) and just ask him to practice with it? What can I do as the top?
Click to expand...

PS - Oh, and KaraBulut - I did originally post in H&W - it wasn't moved...

Thanks again!

Rob
..|
 
Practicing does help. I'm still have virgin :( but been playing with 6" and 8" dildos so I know what to expect when the occasion arrives.
 
Another thread and another bit of advice for you,

Im the bottom in my relationship, sort of same for me at first. I was nervous as it was first anal with bf, so that made it tighter, you sort of not have to think about it going in when its going in. I recommened he takes a shower first and sticks fingers up, checks hes clean and it will let it strech a bit. and make him more comfortable.

I used Durex lube, we tried others, ASDAs own, Boots own and they were rubbish. Durex is priceyish but worth it.

Also he sort of struggled at first but once i was relaxed and EXTREMELY lubed up (cos u can always wipe it off later) he just shoved it in, I dont know if you were holding back a bit cos u dint wanna hurt but yeah just get fully hard and push it right in. If hes relaxed and well lubed it shouldn't hurt.

If that doesnt work I would do what you thought and buy a smaller Dildo which you could make put up there before you put your cock up there.

Also if you think he needs to relax a bit more getting him to wank his cock whilst youre getting it in, will get him to focus less on his arse.

Let me know how it goes! :)
 
normally i would say let him sit on it, but since he's so tight and both of you are new at it letting that happen would probably be no better since he hasn't gained too much control over his anal muscles.

dildos sounds like the best solution and would probably be good for both of you to experiment with.

and the pushing does work. it loosens you up and opens the anal passage (to come out as well as come in). when you clamp down it tightens the hole, preventing anything from leaving or entering. and if the dick isn't in yet, then a tight hole clamping will make all your efforts futile. even if it is in the clamping can make things uncomfortable for the both of you.
 
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