Gay friend hasn't a clue it's me...

[Str8Top14701]

This started a few years back when I joined a gay personals site and got an email from a gay guy that's a friend of a good friend (who's not gay). We had some good emails and IMs, but I let this drift as he wanted to meet but his being a close friend with my friend, I didn't see that being a good idea.

Now and then he'd find me again and we'd tease each other a bit with some pics and hot emails, then he's lose interest when I wouldn't meet.

Now this year he's moved away and has contacted me again. We've had some great hot emails and have now cammed a few times. He still has no idea it's me. He knows I know him through a mutual friend, and that I'm married, and I've told him basic truths about me, with a few things slightly amended to throw him a bit off track, or he'd know who I am ASAP and freak out. I also know I'm on his list of guys that he says he doesn't want, which I find funny because he's told "me" how much I turn him on and how I have him wanting to do things that he'd never have considered before.

It's a bit flattering that he wants me, and I love watching him on cam. He's been so worked up watching me on cam that he's begged to meet saying that at this point he doesn't care if we're related. LOL (We're not, you bunch of pervs lol). But I still know he would freak if he knew it was me, but I think it has more to do with our mutual friend, and on my end I worry that he'd go blab to our friend that I'm bi at some point, and I just don't need that scrutiny, and our friend tends to blab, which also is a trait of others around them.

My wife knows he's hot for me, and find the situation of him lusting after me really funny, and I'm pretty sure she'd be cool with it if the blab factor wasn't there.

He'll be visiting back here pretty soon and has said he wants, regardless of who I am, though I'm not sure if that applies to his "no you" list? It's so tempting to meet as he's wanting me to fuck him bareback (we're both tested and neg), and he wants to do the kinks that I have him thinking about, so it's getting harder and harder to say no.

Not looking for advice, but I had to get that off my chest to someone other than the wife, and I look forward to any replies - They should be at least interesting to read.

 

[BiMike]

Must agree it all sounds hot, thats the problem with on-line relationships you can protect your animosity but just be your true self. However in real life it is not so simple its great that your wife seems not to mind you having some real live fun with the other guy. However if you want to keep the friendship with your 'friend' it is a risky situation to get involved in. Particularly since you do not trust the other guy to keep it a secret between you guys. There is also the problem he does not like you when he sees you for real
You have a real problem !

 

[Georgiadude]

what a tangled web we weave when we deceive. I'd say you have gotten yourself into a mess.

 

[Str8Top14701]

Must agree it all sounds hot, thats the problem with on-line relationships you can protect your animosity but just be your true self. However in real life it is not so simple its great that your wife seems not to mind you having some real live fun with the other guy. However if you want to keep the friendship with your 'friend' it is a risky situation to get involved in. Particularly since you do not trust the other guy to keep it a secret between you guys. There is also the problem he does not like you when he sees you for real
You have a real problem !

I think you meant "anonymity", as "animosity" means "hatred", but I get what you mean, if not what you type. lol

He tells "me" (he doesn't know it's me he's talking to online) that he won't meet [the real] me because of the mutual friend, though for different reasons.

 

[Str8Top14701]

what a tangled web we weave when we deceive. I'd say you have gotten yourself into a mess.

I put him off for a long time without any encouragement from me beyond thanking him when he said he liked my profile and pic. I'm also honest with him as I can be, explaining that the mutual friend of ours makes it an issue. He knows I am married, etc. Also, he's the one coming after me. I don't send him emails out of the blue, or initiate c2c, or IM him first. I'm not leading him on, if anything he and I are trying to find a kind of meeting in the middle.

 

[Str8Top14701]

He tells "me" (he doesn't know it's me he's talking to online) that he won't meet [the real] me because of the mutual friend, though for different reasons.

I screwed up here - He knows that's he's talking to me, I just happen to be on his "no" list, so he doesn't know who I am. I am NOT trying to appear as a different person.

 

[seven2go]

How good a friend is he?
Would it be devastating for you to lose him as a friend?
If not, what do you have to lose by revealing yourself to him?

 

[Str8Top14701]

He's more of a close acquaintance. If it weren't for the mutual friend issue I really wouldn't care if he knew, and I don't think he's have any other issue. But because we're both close with the friend (he's much closer) I'm pretty sure he'd freak and blab sooner or later.

On a less serious side - It's flattering to know that I'm umpteen years older than his is and he's the one chasing me for my body! LOL My wife likes to hear the gist of any communication when he contacts me, and finds the "If he only knew" aspect of this hysterical.