Hey, so i pretty much think i'm gay. I'm only attracted to men and only see girls as friends. I see beauty in women, but that how far as looks go. However, i'm still a little bit confused. I've never been with either a guy or a girl, and i'm not a very outgoing, party person, so i don't mingle with loads of people and have never dated anyone. Gay porn does it for me, and straight porn gets me only a little hard, with 'girl on girl' not turning me on at all. i also get the occasional dream where i'm having sex with a girl, but the dream always takes a turn and i end up with a guy. Is it "normal" that i have dreams like this, does it mean i'm bi or is it natural to have the odd dream here and there about a woman and still be gay? I can see myself being both physically and emotionally involved with a guy but i don't really find the female body that attractive.
Last week I told my oldest friend that i was gay and i said she could tell her mum (coz she's cool
). I was surprised that my friend was actually overjoyed, more so than me. I was relieved to get feelings off my chest after torturing myself for ages, and as soon as i went round to visit her i was greeted with a huge hug from her mum. I didn't realise that her son was gay, so i guess i picked the right family to tell- lucky me. They both said they were shocked and didn't suspect a thing, which i guess would make it harder on me if i tell anyone else, because i have to wait for that whole shock phase to pass :/ it would be so much easier if they're just like "so what". I don't know whether this was a mistake to tell her before i actually know completely, but i feel so much better now.
I want to tell other people, but i'm still unsure if i'm totally gay or if i do like girls or if it's just the fact that there's a guy in the straight porn scene that turns me on. I'm not really one for going out and meeting people. I tend to stick with the same old crowd, plus i'm quite shy so i'd just make a fool of myself anyway. I know 'most' of my family would be totally fine with it, as my brother in law is gay and everyone loves him. I rarely talk to him, so i thought it best if i got help from you guys
Despite knowing people would be cool with me liking guys, i'm still really scared and i just keep passing up chances because i'm not totally sure and i chicken out. Like on the radio the other day there was talk of gay kids being bullied and i wanted to say something but i just kept my mouth shut. Plus is doesn't help with my little sister now calling me gayboy as an insult- at least fatty has been lost to the wind.
It's really tough to tell anyone at college because it is quite packed and i don't see anyone from there outside of hours. I know that if someone may overhear, they are bound to spread it like wildfire, with it ending up on facebook (and all of my family members have fb), so it would all come crashing down at once, but i'd prefer slow and steadily.
On a side note, this guy moved from the walker (i think they're called spacewalkers) on the far end, all the way up to the one right next to me after i got on. He kept looking at me, so i presumed he was interested, and i would have said something if my sister wasn't in front watching everything in the mirror
Guess i lost out on that one. Even if if there are a tonne of women in the gym i still try to scope out a guy , i guess that speaks louder than words.
Sorry if this is not easy to read. I wrote it pretty fast, so i could get everything out and post it before i bottled out. I'm also sorry if i offended anyone
Any thoughts appreciated
Last week I told my oldest friend that i was gay and i said she could tell her mum (coz she's cool
). I was surprised that my friend was actually overjoyed, more so than me. I was relieved to get feelings off my chest after torturing myself for ages, and as soon as i went round to visit her i was greeted with a huge hug from her mum. I didn't realise that her son was gay, so i guess i picked the right family to tell- lucky me. They both said they were shocked and didn't suspect a thing, which i guess would make it harder on me if i tell anyone else, because i have to wait for that whole shock phase to pass :/ it would be so much easier if they're just like "so what". I don't know whether this was a mistake to tell her before i actually know completely, but i feel so much better now.I want to tell other people, but i'm still unsure if i'm totally gay or if i do like girls or if it's just the fact that there's a guy in the straight porn scene that turns me on. I'm not really one for going out and meeting people. I tend to stick with the same old crowd, plus i'm quite shy so i'd just make a fool of myself anyway. I know 'most' of my family would be totally fine with it, as my brother in law is gay and everyone loves him. I rarely talk to him, so i thought it best if i got help from you guys
Despite knowing people would be cool with me liking guys, i'm still really scared and i just keep passing up chances because i'm not totally sure and i chicken out. Like on the radio the other day there was talk of gay kids being bullied and i wanted to say something but i just kept my mouth shut. Plus is doesn't help with my little sister now calling me gayboy as an insult- at least fatty has been lost to the wind.It's really tough to tell anyone at college because it is quite packed and i don't see anyone from there outside of hours. I know that if someone may overhear, they are bound to spread it like wildfire, with it ending up on facebook (and all of my family members have fb), so it would all come crashing down at once, but i'd prefer slow and steadily.
On a side note, this guy moved from the walker (i think they're called spacewalkers) on the far end, all the way up to the one right next to me after i got on. He kept looking at me, so i presumed he was interested, and i would have said something if my sister wasn't in front watching everything in the mirror
Guess i lost out on that one. Even if if there are a tonne of women in the gym i still try to scope out a guy , i guess that speaks louder than words. Sorry if this is not easy to read. I wrote it pretty fast, so i could get everything out and post it before i bottled out. I'm also sorry if i offended anyone
Any thoughts appreciated
I will go at my own pace Echoes, one hurdle at a time 
](/images/smilies/bang.gif "Brick wall ](*,)")
But after i said i wasn't she said it was 'okay' and didn't understand why I hadn't come to her earlier to talk about it.
I love my family. I'm just a little concerned about my brother and Dad- My brother is one to crack jokes that can go too far, but i guess i'll have to deal with that when it comes to it. He's a lot more mature now he's started a family though 
