Gifts from your casual guys

[suckithard1000]

Alright guys I need your advice. If you have a guy that you fool around with now and again and it's supposed to be casual, what do you do when he gives you a gift? It's not something big but it is something meaningful. Is it OK to accept it? What does it mean to the other person?

I have a friend that I hooked up with and we spent a couple of weeks meeting almost every day in this hotel room cause he was here for work.And just before he left he gave me something to remember him by.Yes he is gone, but there is a possibility that he might be coming back.And we have the ability to stay in touch online.I feel like he has become very attached and I don't want that period. I need this to remain very casual.

Advice?

 

[PalacePaul]

I'm always the other side of the story... the guy who's too attached

 

[suckithard1000]

I'm always the other side of the story... the guy who's too attached.

@palacepaul - I usually am too so I understand the attachment. But we had talked about it. Andnthen in a message he said 'I think I am getting attached'. It was the first oh-oh moment so we talked again.

 

[unloadonme]

What was the gift?

 

[suckithard1000]

What was the gift?

A bottle of designer cologne. Retail $200

 

[unloadonme]

Nice. If you hook up again, you could always reciprocate, but otherwise I think I'd just accept the gift graciously.

 

[backagain]

Accept the gift in the way he was giving. He had a fun time as well as you. You may never meet up again.

 

[Araucaria]

I would look at the gift in terms of, is it appropriate given the actual state of the relationship with the guy. If it seems appropriate, I'd just accept it, and perhaps look for an opportunity to give him something similar in kind. But if it is ridiculously out of line with the state of the relationship, say overly expensive, that could be a warning flag. He might be trying to buy your loyalty, or to manipulate you into being obligated to be in relationship with him. In that case I'd look to cut ties, and fast.

 

[Kahaih]

A bottle of designer cologne. Retail $200

Is it the same stuff he wears?

If not, it's kind of strange that it's supposed to remind you of him, isn't it. LOL

Either way, it's quite possible that he was simply regifting it. He didn't want/like it, or he already had more of the same stuff than he could use before it goes bad.

Did he give it to you recently, like right after the holidays? A lot of companies have boxes of stuff like that that they hand out to clients. Leftovers?

Anyway, I really wouldn't think too much about it. It's not a diamond.

 

[suckithard1000]

It would remind me of him because he works in the fragrance industry. This is one of the fragrances he helped develop.

 

[unloadonme]

It would remind me of him because he works in the fragrance industry. This is one of the fragrances he helped develop.

In which case, I don't suppose he paid the full $200 for it.

 

[suckithard1000]

In which case, I don't suppose he paid the full $200 for it.

No I am sure he didn't. He was not trying to buy my affection in a big way I don't think. Just a little way.

 

[rareboy]

Meh.

He probably had a freebie in his luggage.

I am always of the opinion that one should graciously accept a token like this that really isn't personal or too valuable.

If it had been a rolex, I likely would suggest that sitting down and clarifying expectations and meaning would be in order...but for this...not much different than a good meal in a restaurant and more of a memento of the occasion.

Hopefully he will return and you can set fire to the sheets again.

 

[suckithard1000]

Yes I think you are right. It is a memento. It has personal meaning and is something I can look at findly, and even wear to remember the occasion.

Thanks for the insight.

 

[Vannie]

I bet it don't smell as good as my Hai Karate!