Hello everyone, please forgive me for ranting but I have no one I can talk to about this and it’s eating me alive because I’m just so angry.
A couple of months ago I met a man nearly double my age because he’s a professional photographer. In the beginning it was very professional, he covered a lot of industry topics and made efforts to make me aware of how everything worked and to be wary of the pervs and creeps out there who only want to get you naked and molest you, etc. etc. Well, we live literally about five minutes away from each other and over time it turned into a friendship. I’ve gone to his place to hang out, we went to a movie once, and gone to dinner numerous times together. He then confessed one night that he thought he was falling in love with me.
Now let me just say this guy is not my type at all. He’s older than me by a large amount and he does many things I do not approve of like doing weed and using dip. However, I started developing feelings for him. He was my first anal intercourse and we’ve had sex countless times. Everything was fine until I started getting suspicious.
Being a photographer, he sees a ton of guys and gives them the same run down he gave me. He also has a full time 60-hour-a-week job outside of photography (he sees guys in the evenings and shoots on weekends) so I’ve never had a ton of time with him to begin with. Then I started having my evenings get busy and we’ve seen each other even less. I talked to him about what we “are”… boyfriends, fuck buddy, etc.? He said we were dating. I said I wanted more, and he agreed. However he specifically said all his past relationships have been open in that he was free to do things with whoever he wanted as long as he told his partner. I said I did not agree with that and could not be in such a relationship, but that I did want him to tell me if he did do anything with anyone else. He said he could try a closed relationship with me and that was that.
He’s perfectly content with his life though… he loves blowing straight models because all they want to do is get off, he’s happy to oblige, and then they go on their way and keep their mouth shut. I have no idea if he’s actually done anything with anyone else since we started fucking, but he’s said he hasn’t.
Lately he’s been bringing up having a three some. He says it’d be so hot seeing me fuck another guy and I shouldn’t say no until I try it. He brings it up every time I see him, and the other day I finally said no and stop asking. I’m the 1-on-1 type, I want him all to myself and I am only his. I also want to keep somewhat of a reputation and I’m paranoid shit like that gets around.
Through means I’m not proud of though, I found out he messaged another guy after I firmly said no. Apparently this is the guy that he wanted to have the threesome with and he talked a lot about me in it. Basically I’m just a nearby fuck buddy. He said he’s scared I’m falling for him (which I have, but it sort of only happened AFTER he said HE was falling in love with ME) and that he doesn’t want to hurt me, but he’s never been the monogamist type. He wants to trigger my “slut stage” and have me go out and have sex with a lot of other people to get the experience and have a good time.
Needless to say this infuriated me. Firstly that he’s talking to someone else about me (and sent naked pictures of me to him, which I knew I never should have taken to begin with), and second that he’s just playing me to keep me around to fuck while he also wants to do stuff with everyone else. I feel so used and hurt because apparently he’s just stringing me along and not telling me the truth. I can’t confront him about it though because I shouldn’t know about that message.
I did text him yesterday and worded it carefully to not admit anything. I said I feel used that I came for him for modeling and I don’t think that’s been his main interest with me, and then he turned around and said that hurt him for me to think he would use me. Except, I KNOW HE IS!
I just think it’s so hypocritical of him to up-front tell all these guys to beware of pervs and creeps and then once he gets them comfortable he turns around and does it himself. And because he’s careful with who he does it with, he makes sure it doesn’t get out to his industry contacts that would cut him off if they knew.
Thanks for reading all this and if anyone has any advice I’d appreciate it. I’m just so ANGRY but I can’t confront him because I shouldn’t know what I do and I can’t admit to having found out.
A couple of months ago I met a man nearly double my age because he’s a professional photographer. In the beginning it was very professional, he covered a lot of industry topics and made efforts to make me aware of how everything worked and to be wary of the pervs and creeps out there who only want to get you naked and molest you, etc. etc. Well, we live literally about five minutes away from each other and over time it turned into a friendship. I’ve gone to his place to hang out, we went to a movie once, and gone to dinner numerous times together. He then confessed one night that he thought he was falling in love with me.
Now let me just say this guy is not my type at all. He’s older than me by a large amount and he does many things I do not approve of like doing weed and using dip. However, I started developing feelings for him. He was my first anal intercourse and we’ve had sex countless times. Everything was fine until I started getting suspicious.
Being a photographer, he sees a ton of guys and gives them the same run down he gave me. He also has a full time 60-hour-a-week job outside of photography (he sees guys in the evenings and shoots on weekends) so I’ve never had a ton of time with him to begin with. Then I started having my evenings get busy and we’ve seen each other even less. I talked to him about what we “are”… boyfriends, fuck buddy, etc.? He said we were dating. I said I wanted more, and he agreed. However he specifically said all his past relationships have been open in that he was free to do things with whoever he wanted as long as he told his partner. I said I did not agree with that and could not be in such a relationship, but that I did want him to tell me if he did do anything with anyone else. He said he could try a closed relationship with me and that was that.
He’s perfectly content with his life though… he loves blowing straight models because all they want to do is get off, he’s happy to oblige, and then they go on their way and keep their mouth shut. I have no idea if he’s actually done anything with anyone else since we started fucking, but he’s said he hasn’t.
Lately he’s been bringing up having a three some. He says it’d be so hot seeing me fuck another guy and I shouldn’t say no until I try it. He brings it up every time I see him, and the other day I finally said no and stop asking. I’m the 1-on-1 type, I want him all to myself and I am only his. I also want to keep somewhat of a reputation and I’m paranoid shit like that gets around.
Through means I’m not proud of though, I found out he messaged another guy after I firmly said no. Apparently this is the guy that he wanted to have the threesome with and he talked a lot about me in it. Basically I’m just a nearby fuck buddy. He said he’s scared I’m falling for him (which I have, but it sort of only happened AFTER he said HE was falling in love with ME) and that he doesn’t want to hurt me, but he’s never been the monogamist type. He wants to trigger my “slut stage” and have me go out and have sex with a lot of other people to get the experience and have a good time.
Needless to say this infuriated me. Firstly that he’s talking to someone else about me (and sent naked pictures of me to him, which I knew I never should have taken to begin with), and second that he’s just playing me to keep me around to fuck while he also wants to do stuff with everyone else. I feel so used and hurt because apparently he’s just stringing me along and not telling me the truth. I can’t confront him about it though because I shouldn’t know about that message.
I did text him yesterday and worded it carefully to not admit anything. I said I feel used that I came for him for modeling and I don’t think that’s been his main interest with me, and then he turned around and said that hurt him for me to think he would use me. Except, I KNOW HE IS!
I just think it’s so hypocritical of him to up-front tell all these guys to beware of pervs and creeps and then once he gets them comfortable he turns around and does it himself. And because he’s careful with who he does it with, he makes sure it doesn’t get out to his industry contacts that would cut him off if they knew.
Thanks for reading all this and if anyone has any advice I’d appreciate it. I’m just so ANGRY but I can’t confront him because I shouldn’t know what I do and I can’t admit to having found out.
