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How do I approach this guy?

C

cj4today

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Hey guys, I need some help.

I work for a company and for the past 2 days I was in a training class to learn how to perform certain procedures. Well, in the class there were about 26 people. But there was this one guy that was extremely cute and obviously gay. We sat near each other and participated in some hands on training together. It seemed like we were both extremely nervous to start a personal conversation with each other during the class since its a professional environment, and I was too shy to ask him if I could join him for lunch- so i feel that was my only chance to get to know him.

However, he works for the same company but in a different department and I looked up his work email addy through our companys email which we all have.

So, my question is... Would it be inappropriate or too weird if I emailed him through our work email saying that it was nice meeting him at the training class (we've never met before then and I didnt get a chance to say that on the last day of class since I left early). Or maybe ask him about a bag he had that I really liked and ask him where he bought it because I want one.


I feel emailing him would be the only way to get in contact with him because I never see him when i am at work- and it would probably be too weird to look for him in his department.

I just dont know what to do? Please, if anyone has any advice, I would greatly appreciate it!
 
Does your company keep track of what's being emailed? Otherwise yeah this is a good idea. I think the lunch question's better because it's to the point and is still however rather innocuous. If there's no harm in using the company email then take the chance.

Wait...does he know how you got his email...that might be awkward.
 
Well how did this guy respond to you? Did you see any signs at all? And I think emailing him that it was nice to meet him would be really sweet but not sure it would lead to hanging out with him again, so I like your idea with asking where his bag is from. And once he gives the store or the mall, you should say you've always wanted to go there. This way it'll lead to going shopping with him and if he agrees to that, your good. :)
 
Better yet, don't email him the old statment work and play is not a good idea comes to mind (actually the statment is something in the line of don't crap where you sleep).

What is he is not interested nor out of the closet and tells everyone?
 
I don't think asking someone out to lunch in a work sitting is inappropriate---and one e-mail asking for that could not be considered harassment of any kind.
 
Nothing wrong or inappropriate about being friendly, or about making friends at work. The old addage about don't sleep where you shit, or don't shit in your bed is really intended for those whok very closely together which you two obviously don't.

I think an e-mail is a great idea and can see no harm coming from it. It may not end in a relationship but it could end in a good friendship. Why risk losing all possibility of either by not following up on your feelings?
 
An email saying, "Good to meet you and thanks for help during the class" is fine. The important thing is that it gives your name and email address to him. If he wants to respond, he can do so without being put on the spot.

However, before you send that email- make sure that you're prepared for all possibilities, whether it be just friends, more than just friends or the possibility that there is no interest on his part.
 
Workplace relationships are less of a problem if you're in different problems. There are still some issues of the potential of having to work in the same building as your ex, but as long as you don't come in contact with each other that often, it's not as bad as being in each other's faces all the time.

I don't think there's anything wrong at all with a short e-mail like the one Kara spelled out above. Leave the "you caught my eye" or "I was too shy to ask you out" stuff for actual conversation.

Lex
 
wow, thanks so much for everyone's response. I think everyones advice has helped me think this through better and come to the conclusion that it wouldnt be inappropriate to e-mail him. But as someone posted, would it be awkward to e-mail him if he didnt give me his e-mail address and I just looked his email address up through company email?

The only thing i can think of is, if he's interested- whether in friendship or more- he wouldnt mind, or he will feel it was weird of me to do it if he's not interested.!oops!

I think I am going to just wait and see if we ever cross paths at work. I am a true believer in fate, destiny, karma, and if things are meant to be than they just are, ya know? So, I kinda don't want to just make things happen, but then again, you cant always just wait around for things to happen to you, right?:confused: Oh boy, what to do? I think I am going to e-mail him the next time I am at work... If I find the balls to do it....:eek:
 
Fate allowed you to meet him if the first place, it is up to you to take the next step if you are really interested in him---
 
There's nothing wrong with sending an e-mail to him. You didn't have to break into somebody's office, or hire a private detective to suss out his info. You just looked him up - easy.

Again, just keep it short and simple. "Nice meeting you. Just wanted to say thanks for your help in class!" Leave everything else for later conversations. :)
Lex
 
cj4today said:
But as someone posted, would it be awkward to e-mail him if he didnt give me his e-mail address and I just looked his email address up through company email?

G-Lexington said:
There's nothing wrong with sending an e-mail to him. You didn't have to break into somebody's office, or hire a private detective to suss out his info. You just looked him up - easy.

Again, just keep it short and simple. "Nice meeting you. Just wanted to say thanks for your help in class!" Leave everything else for later conversations. :)
Lex
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Exactly. That's why email systems have address lists- so you can look up your coworker's email address without having to ask them for it.

It's good form to thank coworkers for their assistance.

You're over-anticipating the situation. You're not picking out a china pattern for your wedding- you're just letting someone know that you're glad to have met them. Relax!
 
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