How Do You Socialize With One Dimensional People?

[Fishstix]

It could be the straight guy only talks about sex, girls, drinking, working out and if you ever change the subject he somehow switches it back to one of those things again. Or the gay version of that where the gay guy makes being gay his life and only talks about sex, boys, drinking or whatever. Or religious freaks bringing their religion into every conversation. Or the girl who might flip out on you at any second for something you didn't even know you did or said wrong. Just anyone you can't relate to in any way and when you try to find a common ground to talk about, they just some how always bring it back to their 1-3 subjects.

Originally, the answer would be to just ignore or avoid the person but you can't always do that. That person may be a friend of a friend who is always invited along, your friends boyfriend or girlfriend, a cousin, or someone else you're sort of forced to have around when you're invited to do something. For me, having these people around just makes the whole mood awkward, uncomfortable and makes me not want to be there. Especially if the persons always negative about everything, bashing everything you like, other people who aren't around, whining about situations and stuff like that. Without that person around you can have fun, enjoy yourself and everything around you without feeling like you're walking on eggshells all the time but because of the people you hang with and events you're invited to, you're forced to be around them. If you don't talk to them it gets really awkward and uncomfortable but if you do talk to them it also gets really awkward and uncomfortable. Is there a way out of this?

 

[G-Lexington]

If I'm forced to interact with one, I just jump in with both feet. I ask the music geek "Heard any good new bands lately?" or the sex fiend "Meet any hot guys lately?" I've found that eventually I'll find a digression point. The music geek will talk about a new shirt he bought, or the sex fiend will talk about going to a movie. Then I nudge the conversation in that direction.

Lex

 

[Beanstalk]

"The way out is via the door. Why is it that no one will use this method?"

-- Confucius

 

[DonSade]

Pretty much what Lex said: Jump into their dimension... see if somehow they get out of there along the way and pray it's a better path than the original one dimension provided. You see, these people are probably socially challenged and try to cover it up by adhering to something most people would find cool... of course, you're not going anywhere if THEY don't provide you that window of opportunity though.

 

[CudDULL]

Wow DonSade you pin pointed it and took the words out of my mouth. I had an ex friend like this and I love him dearly we had a love hate relationship and in the end I think he killed it with his "one dimensionalism" we could never work out as friends in the end especially since he was ostentatious too.

 

[spencer]

Imagine working for, working with and/or being the boss of one-dimensional thinkers. Welcome to my world

Here's a bad anology. I wear cologne cause I like the smell of it and I don't like the smell of other people.

I don't let other people control the conversation, I control the conversation.

In otherwords, you have to engage in the conversation. Sometimes when I talk my whole group of friends listen intently and no one else talks. If anyone else chimes in, it's usually on topic. If the topic strays, I'll take back control of the topic.

But they're right, if you can't stop talking about things you don't want to talk about, you need to be talking to different people.

 

[Fishstix]

Thanks for the responses, I're read them all twice and thought hard about them. I do try to change the subject but with some people it always goes back to the same subjects with every conversaition I have with them and every time I meet them. I'm partly to blame sometimes for the awkwardness because I never have anything to say around people I can't relate to so I usually just end up smiling and pretending I care hoping it'd end quickly but it never does. I'm most comfortable with people you can talk to about anything even if you're complete opposites.

Beanstalk, if I did that everytime then I'd have to find a whole new group of people to hang out with. And when that happens, I'd most likely be stuck in the same situation with someone else.

Spencer, right on about the coworkers. I forgot to add them to the list.

 

[BAMA32]

I'm rather frank, so in my case when that happens I sometimes call em out on it. I tell them their one-dimensional and only ever talk about XYZ, can't they talk about something else. IF they don't get mad, or even IF they do, they will really try to prove me wrong pretty much every time. Nobody likes to be labeled heheh. Sometimes I piss people off by my honesty, but I've made some really good friends out of folks that I would never thought I would be friends with in that exact situation.

 

[stiletto]

Not very well at all, that is for sure. I'll usually just get so annoyed that it becomes readily apparent (not very polite of me), and ending up with me walking away in search of greener pastures.

I love conversation, it's pretty much one of my favorite things, but conversations like that are so dreadfully boring and wanting of stimulation, I'll inadvertently end up looking for the quickest and most direct 'out'. Oftentimes, that is via me acting like a stuck up bitch once my annoyance reaches critical mass. It's really not the best method, but I can be a moody mother-fucker, and once I put a certain amount of energy into it and get nothing valuable in return, I'm usually all too ready to call it quits.

 

[Lube]

I can see being stuck with family and coworkers, but why friends?

Why do your friends find these bores interesting? Maybe you need new friends.

 

[texan_slant]

Either I don't socialize with 'em;
I step up to the plate and talk about what they talk about;
or change the subject.