I feel horrible.

[CtBoyWonder]

I sent that e-mail to my mother a few hours ago. I didn't even realise that I could be that cruel. I feel horrible now, but I have no idea what to do; I can't really apologise after saying something like that, can I? I don't even know if I want to.



I'm such an asshole. I don't know how to recover from this, and I don't know if I really want to. It hurts me to throw away 19 years of history, but... This whole thing just sucks. It sucks so hard and I want it to go away, and the easiest way to have that happen is just block it out. I'm moving to Vancouver soon anyway, so why should I care?

...Because she's my mother, and no matter how strange her love appears to me, she loves me.

I'm such a bastard.

oh wow! I could never sent something like that to my mother. But then
again I have a very caring, motherly mother.

 

[martin6]

I don't know much about your family, but...

Maybe she's saying those things because she's gonna miss her little boy when he leaves?

Also, just tell her you were pissed and said things you didn't mean (or wish you didn't say at least) and you're sorry. It happens.

 

[backseatboy]

don't worry. my sister has said some things more cruel to my mother and they have the best mother daughter bond I've seen. Send a sincere apology and explain where those emotions came from and how you mentally arrived at that place to e-mail the first letter to her. Have your peace and go. Good Luck.

 

[Seasoned]

Apologize and move on. You hopefully will transition to an adult relationship with her. Good luck.

 

[CtBoyWonder]

That makes me feel so much better. Thanks.

You could give us a short version of what happened. Maybe it would
help seeing where you're coming from.

 

[Esquire0399]

Based on the information you provided, it seems like you have a very judgmental mother who doesn't always show her love in the best ways. If that's the case, then I can definitely relate to your situation. While I have never written anything like that to my mom, I have been feeling similar emotions lately, and I actually wrote a poem about it. Just remember that no matter what she might say, she is your mom and she loves you. Apologize to her and maybe this will actually improve your relationship because now she knows how you feel. Good luck!

 

[rareboy]

Hopefully she'll get the message that she hurt you as well.

But both of you have to work out a better way to communicate with each other.

She has to stop being overprotective and/or un-supportive and you have to stop responding like an angry, hurt child when you deal with your family members and others.

It is now time to work on being more dispassionate and detached from emotions when you form a response to any situation.

So. I agree. apologize and attach a mature explanantion of why her lack of support made you respond the way you did the first time around.

Break the cycle of anger and outrage that appears to have governed your entire family history. Try to get her to do the same.

 

[G-Lexington]

I think rareboy has the right idea. When you respond in a "child" manner, it rewards her for acting like a "parent". If you're going to be an adult, you'll have to start acting and reacting as an adult would. And it's tough. It's a lot easier to name call, to blame, to act hurt, to say mean things in return. Being an adult means saying things like "I was hoping to get some more support from you on this, and I'm rather disappointed I didn't. But that's OK."

Lex

 

[On The Edge]

I'm such an asshole. I don't know how to recover from this, and I don't know if I really want to. It hurts me to throw away 19 years of history, but... This whole thing just sucks. It sucks so hard and I want it to go away, and the easiest way to have that happen is just block it out. I'm moving to Vancouver soon anyway, so why should I care?

...Because she's my mother, and no matter how strange her love appears to me, she loves me.

I'm such a bastard.

well something like that to write back to her is not bad..do apologize..though I say this not knowing ur situation..just be honest of why u sorry..