I felt really suicidal today

[jackoroe]

You know, cum slave, I'm glad you posted here. You've by and large, gotten some great advice. And more importantly, people care about you without really even knowing you.

But we all have been through our own issues. I've been to therapy and taken medication for depression. It wasn't my fault anymore than it is yours. You're sick and you can get well. But you've got to take the first steps to get there. You've got plenty of moral support and prayers of your brethren here. Please don't do anything to the precious gift of life that God has given you.

I'm here to listen, if you don't want to talk publicly. PM me. I know you to be an intelligent guy. Think about getting some help and more importantly, do it! You'll be glad that you did!

 

[ariesstar89]

cumslave, ive been there before man. back during the first and second years of high school...i was depressed and suicidal. i even attempted to kill myself, but i almost got caught and it was kind of a wake up call....i went to therapy and got some medication to help me.

It took me a while, but i finally came out on top. Life does get better. The times seem dark, and that there is no light to guide you anymore, but eventually...a candle is lit, and eventually, it leads you to a beautiful world full of light. Please don't give up....you'll be in my thoughts

 

[LoveLee]

I may not be a psychologists, but I am a student nurse and had a rotation in a psych ward. I sorry for what you are going through, really! I wish there was a way for me to take your pain and anguish that you had to live through. I wish nothing but the best for you and may you find happiness in something that will ease your mind and thoughts. I for one am going through something, but not as far worst as you. I truely do not know what you are going through, because this is your life experience and no one can experience it by walking in them for a mile. Maybe a glimpse. Please find and reach out to people who you know you can trust and who really love you for who you are. I know there are shady people out there, especially parents, but do get the neccessary help there is available to you! Please let us know your progress. Even though I may not know you personally, I want you to live and find the wonders in the nook and crannies. Please laugh at my horrible spelling .

 

[Newbie_69]

Look Honey, this is merely an opinion. You are 100% responsible of your life! You control of your life and what comes to you. Therefore, you have the absolute right to ignore this or do something about it.

First, you told us your medical situation & your family, I feel sorry for that. BUT then again, SO WHAT? Do all those conditions determine your life and how it should be? Are you conditions the vital signs on how your life is going to be? Look, life is not about how many times you've been knocked down. But rather how many times you get up and move forward, STRONGER!

Next, finishing your life is not compeleting it. There's a huge difference. The ultimate goal in life is to compelete it with flying colours. Question to you, how many times do you have to get a D before you get an A+ when you're in school? Life is a learning process. I just can't over emphasize on that. Remember," When you are in pain, you learn."

Determine what you want in life rather than focusing on what you have. " If you aim at nothing, you usually get it." Focus on what you want and move towards that direction. Self pity is such a waste of time. And often times, many people are terribly good at it. Your past doesn't determine your future. What you DECIDE to do now, determines your future. You decide to end it now, you'll never see what the future have for you if you were to continue it. What lies ahead that could just be your true hapiness.

Lastly, enjoy your journey and remember this wonderful quote,

"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chardonnay on one hand and chocolate on the other, body throughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, "Woohoo! What a ride!""

 

[Jak2333]

You'll be okey, it just takes time to work through it. I've though and sometimes still think about killing myself. Never gonna happen though, but the thought still pops in from time to time if have a bad day or whatever. Twice I've come very close to doing it and ofcourse twice I've stopped myself and nobody till now ever knew. Just be strong, and you'll be fine.

Yes, I am not going to see a therapist now because the RNID gave social services a big kick in the backside for me.

I will arrange to see one of their doctors, and I need to see an Otoneurologist which I will have to ask the Audiologists to inform my GP about.

 

[Srappy2]

How are you feeling today? just letting you know that even though we have never met or even chatted. Another real human cares for you. We are all here for a purpose to live the lives we have and hope that we can touch the lives of people around us. PM me if you care to chat I'm not a religious freak as this post may sound but I believe that in the gay community world wide we are all brothers and should at least let each other know that every individual is important to the makeup of our Gay Society

 

[jockboy01]

Well, I am looking into it. It seems he had some trouble following the code of conduct in other forums on here which resulted in a temporary ban. Unfortunately, I've been out of town on vacation so catching up is going to take a bit of time. But I'm looking into it.

 

[cityboi]

Cum Slave, I hope you are able to post again.

I was suicidal 12 years ago. Attempted many times and was so tired and broken down I confessed all to my doctor. I was even feeling a descending numbing effect from the top of my head on down. My doctor referred me to the emergency room at the hospital where they did tests to see if I had tumors or whatever. Then I spent a week in a psych hospital and was hooked up with a great psychiatrist who I still see twice yearly. He put me on two meds that I still take. One is for depression and the other for anxieties. For several years I also went for psychotherapy with a PhD phychologist who he recommended. Since all that I've had many a good time. Made new friends, did some nice travel, etc.

The medical problems you have would frustrate and depress anyone. I believe you would benefit from medicine for depression prescribed by a psychiatrist. If you are so miserable with your family you should seek out subsidized apartments that you could afford on your disability. Maybe you would qualify for an assisted living facility that accepts low income residents.

 

[rahulxxx]

you want a solution?? like ,,an easy one??
stop posting threads here
and just face life
i have been through so much bullshit in life that you wont imagine,,so just continue to face the challenges .. something good is bound to come out of it ...

 

[jamie_01930]

To the point that I located my old karate belts and took one out to see if I could hang myself with it. I got a secure knot tied in both both ends, but couldnt figure how to slip knot both ends. Maybe I am only meant to slip knot the end that goes around my neck and just tie the other around the balcony. But I practiced having the slip knot around my neck and pulling the other end. I couldnt actually hang myself while my family were at home, but I really wanted to do it and get it done with instead of suffering everyday.

I had like a 30 minute fest cos of how messed up I am.

dont ya know you are suppose to just suck up all the pain no matter how much it hurts you. some how you are suppose to put everyone feels b4 yourown

so many things might go wrong trying to hang yourself , go see a shrink and be 100% honest with him/her. you just might find a solution to your situation

been there done that




jamie