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I have got a BIT of an issue

C

CFC4ever

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Hi everyone! So I have an issue and I figured this would be a good place to ask because maybe some of you had experienced the same thing.

Before I tell you the problem you have to know a bit about me. I am gay, or so I believe. I am not attracted to vaginas or boobs at all, but I can't lie that sometimes I look at a woman (clothed) and think my god is she looking incredible. Although I never have sexual fantasies about women. I would say I am between a 4 and a 5 on the Kinsey Scale.

Ok now to my issue. I am quite young and I went to a party on Saturday and there was a mixture of guys and girls who have known each other for a long time. There was one girl that I guess I've kinda always liked. I've known her since we were about 5 (I'm 18 now). I'm just going to call her Jamie (obviously not her real name). And well Jamie told me that if we were going to sleep at all that night she wanted to sleep with me. (Not sex, but literal sleep). Anyway we never slept that night and later in the morning we had a water balloon fight and we were all soaked and went to chill in my friends basement. I decided to lay down for a bit on my back (she was sitting next to me). She decided to lay down too. She laid down and put her head in the little space between my shoulder and pec. She put her arm around me and I could feel her fingers moving slowly and I rubbed her back. The weirdest thing is that I am gay and for the first time in a long time I got that feeling in my chest when you are REALLY into someone. The problem is she doesn't know I'm gay and if I "date" her I would feel like a total tool because I definitely would NOT enjoy myself in bed. And I would feel like i would be lying to her every single day. What do I do?
 
break it to her gently you'll find women are a lot more rational than men
 
Yeah be honest...if she finds out later she'll freak out but if you tell her now she'll likely have her ego pumped that she's so hot she can convert a gay guy. She may decode to see how far she can go or she may decide that she can't go down that road with you, but in either case I bet it makes her feel like the hottest girl around.

And if it doesn't work out, I bet she turns into a great wingman and hooks you up with guys she knows.
 
I agree... it cannot hurt to tell the girl that you are gay, or believe you are, but that when you're around her you feel different... youth is all about experimentation. If she likes you, she might even offer to help you work things out and see where they lead.
 
You said you're gay or "so you believe". Then she laid her head on you & you got that "I'm really into someone" feeling. You're obviously attracted to her so how do you know you won't enjoy yourself in bed with her? You're young & as such probably haven't tried alot of things--don't sell yourself short. She could turn out to be fantastic too. You don't "have" to tell her anything either way. If you sleep with her & you honestly don't like it just say that "maybe we should just remain friends--I value you as a friend & sex usually messes that up." As mentioned in a previous thread women are usually more understanding (& logical) than guys.
 
Yeah, it's possible to be emotionally attracted to one sex and physically to the other.

Not sure what I can say other than DO NOT PASS GO!!

Just tell her you're gay and get it over with now before she makes a fool of herself.
 
if you want to tell her you're gay go ahead. but i don't think she needs to know that. i think you just need to tell her you're not interested in a relationship if she starts to give you hints that she's looking for one (hell she might not be!).
 
no, you have to tell her. put yourself in her position, you would not like some guy to lead you on then dump you. if she is part of your social group you are just going to paint yourself into a corner if you don't put your cards on the table. you will feel great and your friendship / relationship will flourish once you clear the air.
 
I'm with the tell-her division. If you don't say anything to her it'll be much harder doing so later on. If you like her as a friend and want to keep her in your life, you should confide in her. I'm sure she'll be happy to know that she has a special place in your heart.

Every Will needs his Grace. :)
 
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