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I need help please!!

Z

zachy04

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This isn't exactly a "coming out" kind of thread. But more that I need help.

Last night, I was with my friends. Lets call them A, S, and L. A is the other boy with me last night and S and L are girls. We didn't have much to do, and L said that she had a party the other night and still had some alcohol left over. She wanted to know if we wanted to come over and finish it off. We all agreed to go. S offered to drive because she wasn't sure if she was going to drink at all. Me and A had no objection. When we got there, pretty much immediately, Me and A started drinking. But the problem was, I've never been a drinker. I've only drank about three times in my life, but never have gotten drunk. I shotgunned down 4 beers in about half an hour to an hour and had a glass of vodka mixed with apple juice. A had about 3 or 4 beers and 3 shots of different liqours. I am a naturally loud and annoying person, so when I was feeling all this drunkenness, it multiplied by ten. Now, the night was pretty good, until I started fighting with A. He has always been a somewhat mean person to me, but we are still good friends. L and S started to get annoyed with us. Towards the end of the night, me and A were EXTREMELY drunk, but it was like a child drunk. We had to drive home with S, and on the way I puked outside the car, and was having really good conversations with A. When we got to my car, I was still to drunk to drive home, so S told A to drive me home, even though he was still a bit drunk. He drove me home and I talked nonsense the whole time, and we were buddy-buddy. When I got home, I called some people, texted some people, and passed out. This morning, I wake up and find out that S and L are extremely mad at me for what I did the night before. But they do not blame A for anything and are making me feel like shit. Im not sure how to handle this, seeing it was my first time ever getting drunk, and that I got home safely.

Any ideas on how I should talk to them all about what happened? I already explained to them how sorry I was and how I screwed up. But I can tell they are still mad... :(
 
"I'm sorry" is fine, but it works a lot better if:

1. you're very clear about what you're sorry about
2. you make it clear you'll take steps that it won't happen again
3. you offer to help make good what you did wrong

So don't just give them a "sorry 'bout last night". Make it clear. "I'm really sorry I was so annoying last night. Arguing with A all night, making you arrange a ride for me, making you pull over so I could puke, the texts. It was lame to force you into the babysitter role. If there's anything positive to come out of last night, it was a great reminder why I shouldn't get that drunk with other people around. Is there anything I can do? Does the house need cleaning? Or can I take you out to dinner? It's the least I can do after the trouble I caused..."

Lex
 
Thanks Lex! That really is what I should do. Pretty much what is happening now is that S and A are okay. They just don't really want to talk about it. And the funny thing is, is that I have actully liked A for a long time. And last night, I felt closer to him then I ever have. When he was driving me home, I kept saying how much I appreciated him and how I am so thankful that he took me home. And I know he remembered everything from last night so hopefully he got the hint that I care about it. The only part that is bothering me is that I wasn't even really able to enjoy the first time I got drunk. :/
 
>>>When he was driving me home, I kept saying how much I appreciated him and how I am so thankful that he took me home.

Funny. On the very few times that my partner has gotten utterly stinking drunk, he spends most of the time on the way home (and afterwards) apologizing. "I'm sorry, Lex. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. Lex. Lex. LEX!" "What?" "...I'm sorry." OK, you're sorry. Can you be sorry AND get out of the car and inside, please? :)

If they just want to move on, take a cue from them and do so. But don't put them in that position again. Know what your limit is, and stop there.

Lex
 
zachy04 said:
I felt closer to him then I ever have. When he was driving me home, I When he was driving me home, I kept saying how much I appreciated him and how I am so thankful that he took me home. And I know he remembered everything from last night so hopefully he got the hint that I care about it.
Click to expand...


Funny how when you're drunk or high, you feel great love and caring for people.

Unfortunately, if the people around you are not drunk, they are either laughing at you or really annoyed with you.

At least you didn't puke in their car.


zachy04 said:
The only part that is bothering me is that I wasn't even really able to enjoy the first time I got drunk. :/
Click to expand...

Everyone should do it once. No one should do it more than once.

You may be one of those people who shouldn't/can't drink to excess. Just learn from it.

And don't do it again.
 
^ Who of us hasn't made a total ass of themselves being shit-faced at some time in our lives.

But now you know your limits.

So pay attention to them.
 
>>>Everyone should do it once.

>>>Who of us hasn't made a total ass of themselves being shit-faced at some time in our lives.

:wave:

Lex
 
I agree. Everyone SHOULD do it at least once haha. But now things are starting to suck because A told S that I told him a lot of wierd things when he drove me home, which I did. And now I feel like thinks im awkward or its awkward to talk to me...
 
You need to stop caring about what everyone is saying.

Apologize for being an asshole when you were drunk and then tell all your friends to grow up as well.

It sounds like you're all just dying to amp up the drama quotient here and frankly, it just isn't that interesting to try to squeeze more sturm und drang out of it.

So. All of you. If you have this much time to waste on something that is over and done with, then find something more interesting and rewarding to focus on and discuss Like literature. Or film. Or world events. Or women's shoes.

Oh. And if you are a loud and annoying person when you're sober, time to grow out of that as well. And until you do, don't drink to excess.
 
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