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i never show up on gaydar. should I wear a sign that says "BISEXUAL"?

bangthisbi

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I have been out to some gay bars a few times recently to see what they are all about. I went alone every time so I kind of forced myself to meet people right when I get there. I've met some really cool people, but every single person thought I was straight because their gaydar wasn't going off. Doesn't anyone have bidar? Do I need to walk in and announce that I am there to hopefully fuck every man and woman there? I thought it was pretty obvious that a guy alone in a gay bar was there for some man on man hotness. I went to one place that usually has a nice mix of bi, straight and gay people and met a woman that was extremely sweet and absolutely beautiful. I was beginning to think I might actually have a shot at hooking up with her when she told me that her husband was there. Right after she mentioned her husband she asked "you're not gay are you? My gaydar is not going off at all". I don't know if she had anything in mind, but I want people feel like any bisexual advances would be welcomed with open arms by me. How can I project to a mixed crowd that I am into hooking up with men, women and couples? I would love to have a couple take me home with them for some bi sex. I want to find a bi woman for a serious relationship so we could be the couple that takes guys home for sex.
Anyway, it sucks to think that i might be missing out on some great sex just because I don't show up on gaydar. :help:
 
Here's another example. I used to work with a guy that was gay and he made me extremely horny. I would have hopped in bed with him at the drop of a hat. If he asked me to, I would have blown him right there at work.
We were about to leave work one day when I decided I had to tell him how I felt. I moved in very close to him and said "I think I should come over tonight so we can fuck all night long. I want you to fuck me". He thought I was joking around because I didn't show on his gaydar. He was convinced that I was straight. I found out years later that he would have been into frequent sex with me if he knew I was serious. Damn you gaydar.
 
Hey, you should be glad to be who you are. I would rather have someone be a friend than the one asking me if i'm gay, bi, or straight. I would rather have some as a friend, than thinking as a piece of meat. Anyway, if you are looking for a good time, try networking or website that caters to that type of adventure. Website might be risky because you won't know the other person's health until it's too late. So, be on the safe side, stick with networking through friends. Anyone else?
 
Hey buddy. Send me a pm. I'm in socal, so I could maybe introduce you to people.
 
I have been out to some gay bars a few times recently to see what they are all about. I went alone every time so I kind of forced myself to meet people right when I get there. I've met some really cool people, but every single person thought I was straight because their gaydar wasn't going off. Doesn't anyone have bidar? Do I need to walk in and announce that I am there to hopefully fuck every man and woman there? I thought it was pretty obvious that a guy alone in a gay bar was there for some man on man hotness. I went to one place that usually has a nice mix of bi, straight and gay people and met a woman that was extremely sweet and absolutely beautiful. I was beginning to think I might actually have a shot at hooking up with her when she told me that her husband was there. Right after she mentioned her husband she asked "you're not gay are you? My gaydar is not going off at all". I don't know if she had anything in mind, but I want people feel like any bisexual advances would be welcomed with open arms by me. How can I project to a mixed crowd that I am into hooking up with men, women and couples? I would love to have a couple take me home with them for some bi sex. I want to find a bi woman for a serious relationship so we could be the couple that takes guys home for sex.
Anyway, it sucks to think that i might be missing out on some great sex just because I don't show up on gaydar. :help:

You needed to TELL HER because she was obviously interested in you. Nobody will know for sure what you into until you TELL THEM. Once you TELL PEOPLE what you are into/looking for and then actually doing it word will get around and then your dance card will be full. But none of that can start happening unless you start going to bars full of telepaths or you start TELLING PEOPLE.
 
As jd alludes to in his reply, don't expect people to be able to read your desires or thoughts. "Gaydar" is just an assumption about another persons sexual orientation based on stereotypical personality ques. The first step for you, is to become comfortable with yourself and be willing to honestly share your desires with those in whom you are interested.
 
I have to say I think I finally found a website that I like and will actually be helpful. I have tried out some other sites and they just weren't for me. I just joined and already feel comfortable. JUB members seem to be of a higher quality than most.

I was probably way too tired and frisky to be posting the other night. I posted anyway and have had some great replies.

I look back at the night and the bar and realize that I was just being chicken. I need to stop worrying about what people will think if I tell them I'm bi. I doubt anyone would bat an eye in a bar full of gay, straight and bi people. If I had just told her, any number of positives could have happened.
 
I have only told two people that I know about my true orientation. One is my lesbian cousin on the east coast. She is great for moral support, but that's about it because of the distance. The other person is a gay friend. I knew he would be very accepting of my sexuality, but it still took me years to tell him. I must say that it felt really good to finally say the words "I'm bisexual". Even though he is one of my best friends, I still feel funny talking about certain things with him. I hope to find some good friends here and know that I can be totally open about my bisexuality.
 
Dude, where are you bi guys in real life? I'm a girl, and I've always wanted to date a bi guy, but I can't seem to find them in real life (and I don't think I'd find the nerve to ask a guy whether he'd do a guy or not because most would take offense at it).
 
Yes. Welcome to JUB. We are quality people, true. Be prepared for the odd "you're secretly gay" remark or "you're incapable of committing" remark or "you're only capable of committing with a woman" remark, but whatever. I've been interested in bi guys when I was single and I think they're great.
 
I can totally relate to this.

Went to a bar with a gay friend and his friends, one asked me why i was there and that i should be out "breeding"
 
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