i think i love my best friend...

[FangBanger09]

he's the only person i can't wait to talk to. i trust him more than anyone else and i love everything about him... i know that he has feelings for me. he'd do anything for me and i'd do anything for him.... but he's been dating a guy for 2 years and i just dont know if anything will ever happen. is this a hopeless case?

 

[sunrise89]

When u're alone with him. Just tell him. Don't worry if he'll say "no, I can't", cos if he's really is your friend, he never leave u no matter what! U're not a hopeless case: really!

 

[FangBanger09]

well im not worried about that really... i think im just bein selfish. i mean i dont like there being another guy in his life. i just wish he could need me as much as i need him

 

[sunrise89]

When u love someone u want that person just for u: it's normal! However u have to tell him, maybe something will happen. I understand a little cos I started love my best friend that is straight, but when I told him he kissed me back and for a year we were a couple. (we break up cos he dosen't want that people knows the he's bi)

 

[Seasoned]

You must have an idea what he thinks of his relationship and his boyfriend. If he ever expresses doubts about his relationship you might tell him that you would treat him differently. If he has a true boyfriend you'll have a rough time around the two of them if you directly tell him what you are feeling. Do you have a life of your own away from this friend?

 

[KaraBulut]

he's the only person i can't wait to talk to. i trust him more than anyone else and i love everything about him... i know that he has feelings for me. he'd do anything for me and i'd do anything for him.... but he's been dating a guy for 2 years and i just dont know if anything will ever happen. is this a hopeless case?

Well, you're supposed to love your best friend and have feelings for him like this.

But just because you love him doesn't mean that you should be boyfriends. And that is really what the issue is, right?

 

[FabFairy]

You do need to let him know you care/love him but in a non-confronting way. If you were supposed to be together time will tell. No case is ever hopeless tho life may have a different plans for you both.

All anyone can do it tell him and then step back and let him work it out for himself

 

[SonOfSlobone]

If he's been with another guy for 2 years, and friends with you all that time, it sounds like he's put you in the category "friend." It's pretty hard to jump categories.

Sometimes when you know somebody really well, they're actually less attractive to you sexually, because there wouldn't be any feeling of adventure or surprise.

I would say, forget about him as a sex partner for now, and just stay friends. It may be that if he breaks up with this guy you'd have a chance.

In the meantime, there's no reason why you can't put yourself out there more. Who knows, you might find somebody who's just right for you.

But even if all you do is mess around, it will help get your mind off your friend. And the next time he's between relationships he may find you a little more interesting...

 

[hotb0d]

so you know he has feelings for you? Then it's time that you guys admit your true feelings. Don't you just sit around and wonder. Do something about it before it's too late.

 

[Just_Believe18]

Some of you guys need to realize the best friend is in a relationship with another guy for the past 2 years. You need to respect that.

Your best friend is unavailable. Don't wait around for him to break up with his boyfriend, and don't admit your love for him with the hopes of that happening. Move on, date a couple guys of your own. You just may find someone to replace those feelings with.

 

[rareboy]

^Listen to Just Believe.

 

[FangBanger09]

soreknees... of course i have a life away from him. he actually lives on the other side of the country yet we stay in touch all the time... it'll be another month or so before he'll get a chance to visit

karabulut... yes, i'll always love him anyway because he is my best friend but at the same time i want more with him

fabfairy... i completely agree. if its meant to be, it will happen. but to me, it doesnt seem as far-fetched as a twist of fate

sonofslobone... i have no sexual desire for him at all. im a virgin and i plan on staying that way till marriage (call me old fashion).

hotb0d... i know he would be lying if he said there was no feelings but i also know that im gonna have to make the move. he still treats me like a kid and i need to show him that im mature enough for him... and no offense to him but its really not that hard to reach his maturity level

just_believe18... i understand where u're coming from bc personally, i get annoyed by people in my situation but i have no desire for other guys. im not a casual dater and i dont want to replace the feelings i have for him. i dont suppress my feelings, i act on them

 

[spencer]

I would be offended if my fiance had no sexual desire for me whatsoever. I can even understand the waiting part. But what would we be waiting for when you put it that way?

If you really love him, you'd want nothing more than to see him happy. Interfering with a 2 year relationship with him doesn't exactly scream that either.

And both those don't exactly show maturity, IMO, either.

But it's good that you're gonna show initiative, hope it works out for you. Cause not matter what we say, you're gonna do it anyway. Just realize what you're doing as you do it.

 

[FangBanger09]

its not like im completely ruling him out sexually. im just saying that sex isnt what attracts me to people. however if i do decide he's the one i want to spend the rest of my life with (or anyone else for that matter) then i will open that door.

and i agree that i do want him to be happy. at the moment, he makes me happy and i know he's happy when he's talkin to me but it's not like i'm gonna be a homewrecker in order to become happier. i'm just hoping that soon he'll realize how much happier he could be with me... that's the part that makes me feel pathetic

 

[G-Lexington]

So, you do want him to be happy...only if that happiness involves you.

I had a friend like that. He waited around for this woman as she went through a series of bad boyfriends, waiting for her to realize that he was really the one for her. You know how long he waited? Eleven years. Over a decade. And you know how it ended? She got married. To someone else. And decided it was a little creepy having him around, so would he please go away?

You have three options.

1. Keep waiting.
2. Make a move. Tell him you're interested in him as more than just a friend, and hope he'll do what he's supposed to do next.
3. Keep him as a friend, and find someone else to fall in love with.

Lex

 

[Just_Believe18]

Oh, he lives on the other side of the country? Then this is even less of an issue than we originally thought. He is so out of your league and perspective. Crushing on a guy who lives thousands of miles away and has his own life and own boyfriend is a tad silly, even if you "do keep in touch every day."

 

[FangBanger09]

G-Lexington... 2

Just_Believe18... I'm moving to where he lives in about a year. and u have no clue what league or perspective im in

 

[G-Lexington]

Cool. Go for it. Tell him you've got major feelings for him, and you want to know if he has feelings for you.

Lex

 

[rareboy]

Yeah.

Tell him you wish he'd break up with his bf and that you'd be better for him.

Then you'll see what league you're in.

 

[spencer]

yeah, go for it. Next year when you move.