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I think my boyfriend's an impossible cunt

M

MJ193

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And I don't use that word lightly. I never use that word, but I don't think there's any other appropriate one to use. I love this guy so, so much, but I don't know where to go from here.

It's been rocky from the start, about two years ago. I was coming out of another long-term relationship and he was there. Beautiful. Intelligent. Funny. Deep. But we just. can't. communicate anymore. I've got my issues too--I'm no angel--but is a rational, thoughtful, patient relationship too much to ask for?

It's been long-distance for a year now. I moved for a job, and things were really unclear for the first few months of the distance. We each made some serious missteps (his, in my opinion, were far more egregious than mine. If I went into the gory details, I think you'd agree too), but, starting last Christmas we really began to talk seriously about a lot of things, and we've been flying to see each other every 6 weeks or 2 months or so. It's rough, but we try to make it work, and we've begun talking seriously about moving to be with one another. But he is one of the most irrational, petty, vindictive, impatient, downright nasty persons I've ever been in arguments with. He usually apologizes afterward, and we talk it out, and I hope HOPE that that situation won't arise again, but it does. Without fail. And my hope is waning. He brings out the worst in me, and I don't know what to do.
 
MJ193 said:
And I don't use that word lightly. I never use that word, but I don't think there's any other appropriate one to use. I love this guy so, so much, but I don't know where to go from here.

It's been rocky from the start, about two years ago. I was coming out of another long-term relationship and he was there. Beautiful. Intelligent. Funny. Deep. But we just. can't. communicate anymore. I've got my issues too--I'm no angel--but is a rational, thoughtful, patient relationship too much to ask for?

It's been long-distance for a year now. I moved for a job, and things were really unclear for the first few months of the distance. We each made some serious missteps (his, in my opinion, were far more egregious than mine. If I went into the gory details, I think you'd agree too), but, starting last Christmas we really began to talk seriously about a lot of things, and we've been flying to see each other every 6 weeks or 2 months or so. It's rough, but we try to make it work, and we've begun talking seriously about moving to be with one another. But he is one of the most irrational, petty, vindictive, impatient, downright nasty persons I've ever been in arguments with. He usually apologizes afterward, and we talk it out, and I hope HOPE that that situation won't arise again, but it does. Without fail. And my hope is waning. He brings out the worst in me, and I don't know what to do.
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It sounds like you still Love him with all your heart..The same thing happened to me a while back..One day I realized that I still Loved the person but I no longer liked them.

Now...You can both try to make it work. Long distance is nothing but extra-stress that's never good for any relationship. So perhaps moving is part of the answer. You both need to sit down lay it all out on the table then put some action behind the things you want to improve in the relationship...Working on the communication issues has to be a priority....

Based on what you've stated I believe the 2 of you can work out all of your issues...I just really hope what happened in my relationship does not happen to you..After years of being together I realized I was no longer a Priority, the Love remained but i stopped liking that person and in the end we argued, made-up over and over again...

But let me tell you this..When you stop Liking the person you're in Love with the relationship is in danger of ending...
 
Is there a word for someone who stays in a long-distance relationship with an impossible cunt?

Lex
 
You should probabl evaluate the longterm goals you wish to gain from this.

Maybe your relationship was just one of those right place right time situations.

You both kind of sound like cunts though, but I know how it can be, you two feed of off each other cuntiness. Perhaps give the relationship a rest for a while. Go a little bit without communicating and figure out what each of you really wants. Gain some perspective and grow up a little in the process.
 
umm, no real advice, but may I just say your thread title convulsed me - finally a title has beaten out Fuck, Marry or Slap?, which made me snort with laughter every time I ran across it... anyhoo - good luck !
 
To me it sounds like you have made up your mind and just need to listen to your head instead of your heart.

Don't you want to be with a man that treats you with kindness and love instead of a man that brings out the worst in you? To me it is a easy choice but I know that is what the head says and the heart makes it a tough decision.
 
Well he may be a cunt, but some might think you are giving him a run for his money.

Stop complaining. Set him and yourself free.

It sounds like two years of punishment is enough time served.
 
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