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I told my Dad.

J

JarodA

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Basically today I met my Dad for lunch in town, with the intention of discussing me being gay (he already knows, but he's religious and thinks I'm trying to 'change' it ](*,) ). I basically told him that I've accepted it :). Well, in the end anyway :lol:.

First I had to listen to him spend ages talking about my need to change (yeah fucking right...#-o). I did have an elaborate speech in my mind, many things I was going to say, but it was useless. Eventually he got the message though.

I've had mixed emotions ever since. But I just have to remember that I haven't done anything wrong here. I'm just playing the hand I've been dealt. I don't need convincing that I can't change. I've accepted for all this year and most of last that I am gay, that's the way it is.

My family are mostly either religious or formerly religious while still holding onto the anti-gay idea :lol:. So I'm not expecting really any family support. :rolleyes: But I might come out, properly this time, to my Mum. Wish me luck I guess.

On other notes, I've been thinking lately how much I'd really love a BF. But I know that's a long way off.

Socially I'm useless :lol:, can barely talk to anyone, no real friends to speak of. One tip I've read a lot lately is join the gym, become more active. I've been doing that, I've come to enjoy the gym, I mostly go every second day. It helps the overall mood a lot. Next year I plan to start learning to play tennis, which I dearly love. :D

But yeah, I feel like I'm ready for a BF, to have sex (that's not all I'm after in a BF though lol), and all that. But I'm trying not to be in a hurry. Like I said, probably no family support (though I do think my Mum will come round im time) at least at first, but that won't kill me. ;)
 
It sounds like you're both in a good spot, and heading in the right direction. Keep it up. ..|

Lex
 
Firstly, grats on telling a parent. I do know people that are 40+ that haven't gone there yet.

Secondly, your church, and in relation to family and you.. a) what religion are you b) is being out going to cause you undo angst in that community?

I think you have a healthy start. Don't search too hard for a bf though.. Looking like you are "looking" can sometimes bring in the wrong sorts. Just be yourself.
 
Halifaxboy8 said:
Firstly, grats on telling a parent. I do know people that are 40+ that haven't gone there yet.

Secondly, your church, and in relation to family and you.. a) what religion are you b) is being out going to cause you undo angst in that community?

I think you have a healthy start. Don't search too hard for a bf though.. Looking like you are "looking" can sometimes bring in the wrong sorts. Just be yourself.
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Don't know if you've ever heard of the 'church of christ'. Yup, that's the one. And yes, I think there would be some angst. No violence or anything :lol:, but I think I could certainly expect to have words with some of them. Or them with me anyway :D. But they won't discourage me :).

Oh and I'm definitely not looking too hard :lol:. I'm not desperate, and I'm not the type to get super-horny, so I'm not going to make any rash decisions. If I see a hot guy at the gym I'll take a peek, but that's it :D. Improving my body to look more attractive will be a big plus though, one of my biggest motivations. I'm still being myself though, but I feel like I'm improving myself if I look better. Plus I've always been unhappy with my fitness level. I have many reasons for going. :D
 
I told my mom last week during thanksgiving break that I was bi, and that I've been with guys already. She took it better than I thought she would, but there was a little disappointment that I was not straight.

I asked her if she might have already known, and she kinda did know. I don't act like a "straight" person really. I'm too interesting for that :).
 
Your family might eventually surprise you. Gay isn't all that you are. You are still their son, still the same young man they raised. Make sure they know that.

And you should be proud of yourself for taking this step. Take in the confidence and make use of it. Confidence is very sexy.
 
Aussie saying hi to the kiwi. ..|

Good work on being honest with your father.

I can relate to you in relation to working out after coming out. I have lost 10kgs since I came out late October. Have a look in my blogs for more detail, if you like. I have rambled a bit in there.

I am in the same boat as you mate. Come out and now want a bf, but not into rushing it but also not really sure how to go about things either. Just know your not alone.

Your going about things in a good positive way and I hope you get the results your after. Good luck mate. :)
 
crowboy said:
Aussie saying hi to the kiwi. ..|

Good work on being honest with your father.

I can relate to you in relation to working out after coming out. I have lost 10kgs since I came out late October. Have a look in my blogs for more detail, if you like. I have rambled a bit in there.

I am in the same boat as you mate. Come out and now want a bf, but not into rushing it but also not really sure how to go about things either. Just know your not alone.

Your going about things in a good positive way and I hope you get the results your after. Good luck mate. :)
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Hi Aussie. :p
 
Hey my friend....
I read your thread here..
You are a very courageous guy.

I know that was tough for you talking to your dad. You amaze me in so many ways my friend.

You dont' want to be gay, but you realize you are.. coming out to your dad was a very hard thing for you do to.
Holy cow I'm so proud of you.
I will write to more in a pm.

To anyone that reads the thread this guy wrote.. well you should know that this is one of the finest guys in this world.
He has struggled with this whole deal for a while, much more than must accepting being gay.. much more to his life than just that.

Anyone that reads what he wrote must know that there is much more to the life of JarrodA than his accepting being gay.
He is a damned fine guy in so many ways..
And anyone that reads this should know that about him.

I've know this guy for a while via jub. And if anyone of you want to write to a fine, smart, intelligent guy, then you should write to him.

There are many guys I've met via jub during my time here.. there are few that are as fine a guy as this person is.

haha, well I'm pretty sure I"ve embarrassed the op here.. I will make my apologies to him later.

:D
 
OMG Rick, thanks. :hug: I'll just say thanks for the PM and this message in here. :)
 
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