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"I'll call you"

Jerry

Here, hold this
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I know what you mean. I recently met a guy and even had a conversation with him about this when we first met up. So afterward I emailed and told him I had a good time, would be interested in doing something again. He emailed back and said he was interested too, so I replied that I'd leave it up to him when we'd get together since he has different hours and stuff with work. Haven't heard back. Maybe I will, who knows. But guys seem to just ignore people instead of just saying they're not interested or are moving on. I don't get it.
 
That's typical of online dating, it happens several times. Now I don't expect anything from a guy until a second meeting. "I'll call you" is simply an courteous form of saying "I'll never call you". But sometimes man becomes overly suspicious. Last time I met with a guy who was simply gorgeous, intelligent, sexy and it seemed that he was into me. We spent long hours together, sitting on the riverbank and talking. Next day I sent him an SMS with the text: "Sometimes I send an after-date message - this is it" His answer: "Sometimes I do too". OK, I said to himself, he is not interested, forget him. After 3 days he sent another message that he would like to met up again. I was totally surprised.
 
This happened to me with a guy I met online back in July. We met and had lunch: it went wonderfully. We texted each other saying how much we enjoyed ourselves and we talked about going to see a movie together. Couple days passed and I hadn't heard anything so I texted him again, he replied that he was busy and some such, and that was that.

Now there's another guy I've been talking to for the last week. We've had some very lengthy conversations (which I haven't had before with guys online) and we text each other daily. We're meeting up for dinner this weekend so I'm just hoping everything goes swell and we hit it off.
 
The same happened to me a few days ago. I had a nice little chat with a guy in plentyoffish and he said he had to go and he would talk to me later. 2 days after, I saw him online and sent him a pm, he read it and ignored it.
I just left it like that, why bother?
 
This has happened to me twice in the past 2 months.

The first guy we just hung out once, nothing hanky panky, then I spent the next 3 weeks trying to get him out again (with dignity, not stalker-ish lol) but no success, he was always like he's busy he's traveling and whatnot... last text I got from him said "I'll text you when I get back"... a week later, I texted him, to which he never responded, so I removed him completely from all contact.

The second guy, well, this is a bit ugly. We met up at his place, it wasnt initially planned. Had a nice conversation in which I later found out he was "drunk", we then made out and did some dry humping, he was acting so into me the whole time, which made me think we were going to get together again FOR SURE. A week later, when the reality kicked in, I realized one week of sleep loss over this guy and texting/msging back and forth were all in vain. Honestly I was a little heartbroken, I liked the guy...

Now I'm just looking forward to what the third one turns out to be.

Oh did I mentioned I met these guy online?
 
I kind of feel a little embarassed reading this. I joined this Russian online dating site, met some cool friends and stuffs. There has been times when guys would arrange a date with me (as in real date over at his place) and I kind of say, 'busy now, maybe this weekend'. Weekend came I sent him an sms saying, I've got stuffs to do now, will be busy till 7 and by 7 I didn't contact him...

That was like 2 weeks ago, and I still have yet to meet up with him.

The truth is I don't think I'm ready to meet that guy (I'm in a really complicated state of mind now) and I kind of want to leave it hanging till the day that I'm SURE I'm ready. And really don't want to blow off this really good thing that we have with each other.

So I guess sometimes some of these aren't intentional? Just happens...
 
^^ yeah how hard would it be to say "hey i'm not ready to meet yet. I have a lot of things going on and i don't think i would be very fun to hang out with." I don't get why people can't just say what's on their mind. Dating and relationships would be so much easier then. And if a guy doesn't want to meet up again why not just say see ya instead of call me or i'll call you. I seriously don't get why this is such a hard concept for some people.
 
i think it comes down to a simple lack of respect for the other person. It a step beyond "he's just not into you"; its more like "he just doesn't give a damn about you."
 
^ It's never a good idea to keep someone hanging there when it comes to this kind of things, if you could put yourself in the other person's shoes.

I've learned the hard way to move on when something like this happens to me, regardless what the guy's excuses are, no one's worth the wait.
 
>>>i think it comes down to a simple lack of respect for the other person. It a step beyond "he's just not into you"; its more like "he just doesn't give a damn about you."

Not quite. More like "My embarrassment/nervousness in having to do this is greater than my feeling you really have the right to know."

Lex
 
^^ yeah how hard would it be to say "hey i'm not ready to meet yet. I have a lot of things going on and i don't think i would be very fun to hang out with." I don't get why people can't just say what's on their mind.

I usually say this and 99% of the guys just stop talking to me #-o
 
I was in a similiar position just a 2 days ago. I was talk with a guy on line who wanted to meet. She we started texting and then all of a sudden he stopped texting. I saw him on line and sent a message and did not get a response.
 
Yeah, sometimes it's just the other person needing to take some time to think it through. I messaged that guy and he said it's cool. Said to message him when I feel like it.

Anyway, this guy I'm talking about, we've been chatting online for the past few months and have grown pretty close. So I suppose he knows I wasn't really planning on blowing him off. I really do need some time to think it through...

Plus he asked me to meet him at his house and I got this feeling that if I eventually do meet him I might lose my virginity then and there and hrm...

Yeah, that's why I need to think it through.
 
It's even worse when you ask if they want to do something, and they're all like yeah dude totally! (exclamation marks of enthusiasm included!)

And then, of course, the same message ends with... "I'll let u know...", referring to final details as to date/time/arrangements.

Of course, whenever you receive something that ends with "I'll let u know", let the unsuspecting recipient beware: They usually WON'T "let u know".

</rant>
 
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