I'm 18 and horny. So why can't I keep it up?

[Matt-T]

This is a problem that is causing me some *MAJOR* concern.

Like the title says, I'm 18 and naturally horny, but I can't seem to keep an erection when I'm with a guy. When I'm jerking off by myself - whether I'm watching/reading porn or not - I stay hard and can get off quite quickly if I wanted/needed to. But lately I've starting seeing another guy and, no matter what I try, it just won't co-operate. When we're laying in bed together next to each other, stroking each other and kissing, I'm as hard as a rock and ready to go - but when it comes to going further, I deflate. Even something as simple as switching positions can soften me.

It's not an attraction problem - I'm into him and vice versa. The thing is, this isn't the first time this has happened to me. I've ready only ever been with one other guy before the one I'm with now, and I also had problems keeping it up with him - but I thought that was because I wasn't really into him and he always smelt of cigarettes (ew).

I'm booking an appointment with a local GP tomorrow and I'm going to bring it up, just to be on the safe side, but is there anything else that could be preventing me from staying hard? Any tips for keeping me hard?

 

[Hot Hector]

How nervous are you around him, if at all? It used to happen to me whenever I got too stressed out!

 

[laorish]

It might be time to get a cock ring?

 

[Telstra]

^ cock ring is a turn off .

 

[Shepherd 2]

It might be time to get a cock ring?

Maybe, not a bad idea, but nice to keep an ererction without one.

Perhaps it is anxiety to perform. Perhaps a mild sedative would help.
Or you could talk it through.

The GP may give you a little blue pill. Give it a try.

Shep+

 

[DotComGuy]

It might be a physcological hurdle.
I used to have a hard time cumming when I was first with a guy. It went away
Id say try Viagra or cockring (first choice)

 

[jockboy01]

What you're describing is a psychological problem. It is NOT an indication for viagra. Biologically you're fine, but for whatever reason, you have a mental hurdle. Take your time, get comfortable with him, it'll happen.

 

[Matt-T]

Should I look for a therapist or something? =S

 

[2boyzukuk]

I assume your not diabetic or have problems with blood pressure as these can both have similar effects to the ones you describe but sure your doctor will look into those anyway.

 

[jackoroe]

I have to agree, your just somewhat uncomfortable. Learn to relax. If you worry about losing wood, you almost certainly will.

 

[racer2438]

I think you need to be more relaxed and not stress over it. As it has happened for a bit now, you are now concentrating over it more and the stress is getting to you. You put the thought in to your head and now it's working on it's own whether you like it or not. Now you have to over come it.

By the way a cock ring is not a turn off and it will enhance the sex your having alot and they are pretty cool and fell great when you cum.

good luck

 

[KaraBulut]

Two issues here-

There is probably not an underlying physical cause for your erection problems because you are able to get an erection and maintain it when you are by yourself.

The problem is probably psychological in origin. It's not unusual- and seems to be quite common in very young guys who get very excited very quickly but loose their erection during sex. It's usually temporary and gets better as the young guy gets more confident and comfortable being naked with another guy.

The problem that happens in a lot of these situations is that there is one time where the guy "can't get it up". And after this one time, the fear of it happening again becomes causes anxiety and this anxiety becomes a major distraction during sex.

Something to think about- since you are able to stay hard when you are by yourself jacking off, have you tried jacking off while your boyfriend watches? Or maybe get naked and cuddle in bed and begin foreplay while you're already naked and ready for sex? This way there isn't an interruption in things while you take clothes off and get read for sex.