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Is Cyber sex cheating?

dddog71

dddog71

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What would you do if you found out that your partner is haveing cyber sex with guys online and has been doing private shows in chat rooms with them. Is this cheating? :confused:
 
dddog71 said:
What would you do if you found out that your partner is haveing cyber sex with guys online and has been doing private shows in chat rooms with them. Is this cheating? :confused:
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Yes. The definition for cheating in this context is to act unfaithfully sexually. Because a partner engaged in actively seeking out other men and performing arousing acts with them does, indeed, constitute cheating. Your partner should show complete faithfulness if the agreed upon relationship is monogamous, which means being content with one person whom they have exclusively chosen to express this type of affection toward.

Oh, and as to what I would do, end the relationship. I can't tolerate dishonesty.
 
I think that would be a matter of the definition that you and your partner SHARE of cheating.
 
yes. at the very least it is what i call 'precheating'...it's taking interest in other guys for sexual reasons...it would be different had he been open with you about it the whole time, and you've discussed it.

that being said, if someone lies to you, they can't be trusted, and without trust, how can there be love?
 
I consider it cheating if you are with someone already.
 
Does it matter if any of us think its cheating or not? The point is your BF is doing something that clearly you arent comfortable with and the fact you asked the question suggests you feel he has betrayed your trust. You need to talk to him and decided what to do if he wont stop.
 
>>>What would you do if you found out that your partner is haveing cyber sex with guys online and has been doing private shows in chat rooms with them. Is this cheating?

Cheating isn't the activity so much as the attitude. Is he hiding this from you? If so, he's cheating. If he's up front about it, then he isn't.

Lex
 
camming is not cheating, its just a way to get off, like live action porn.
 
As always - Lex gives VERY sage advice.

If it upsets you - perhaps you should share your concerns with him?

If he is contrite and says "I didn't think it would bother you" - and stops...I think you could classify it as a 'misunderstanding' and hopefully all will be OK.

If his attitude is 'what are you making a fuss about - I'm not going to stop' then you may have more reason to worry...
 
Normally, I'm pretty open minded about what people do to maintain their individuality when in a relationship. People need their space sometimes. Jerking off ALONE to porn is not cheating. Going out to dinner to dinner ALONE, on occasion, is not abandoning your partner. But cybersex? That's another thing entirely. Two way interactivity, whether with cameras, telephones, chatrooms, or your own warm bodies is a form a relationship infidelity, unless your partner condones it by prior agreement.
 
Corny said:
I think that would be a matter of the definition that you and your partner SHARE of cheating.
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I agree, the important thing is how you both feel about it. You need to discuss it with him and decide where your boundaries are. No two couples are the same.
 
Does he always want more sex than you're willing to give? Then I'd say it's an innocuous way to deal with that "problem".

If he's becoming less interested in sex with you, however, yeah, it's cheating. (Although, honestly, I don't get cybersex at all. It does nothing for me personally.)
 
What matters if if you think it's cheating, you really should talk to you boyfriend.
 
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