Mom to Scott: "What happened to you?"

[The_Reaper]

I needed a new toque...

For my neighbours to the South, and other people unfamiliar with the term Toque, it is a hat worn during the winter to keep your head warm. See below:

Anyways, she made a lot of silly suggestions....Like those hats with the ear covers that you can snap together under your chin and so forth.

Me, being who I am...And possessing what I conclude to be a larger than average head, looked ridiculous in the thing and decided to stick with a normal toque instead.


Anyways, on the car ride over to my aunt's...My mother got off on a small rant.

"I tried to get him to buy one of those hats that I got...But he just wanted an average toque. What happened to you, Scott? You and me, we always used to be unique and dress in what ever we wanted to. We didn't care what other people though."

A quick scan of my childhood, which contains many blanks in my memory, concluded that she was actually right.

So, what the hell happened to me?

 

[sparky95]

You got tired of people staring at you in the street with open mouths, and a frightened look in their eyes?

 

[JakeBequette]

You got tired of people staring at you in the street with open mouths, and a frightened look in their eyes?

We always called those a sock cap.​

 

[treanir]

So, what the hell happened to me?

You got a mind of your own?

It doesn't matter that you wear what everyone else wears, as long as it's your decision and not that of your mum/your friends/society.

 

[slobone]

Please, I went through my entire childhood wearing a balaclava helmet knitted by my mother... so Hell holds no terrors for me...

 

[sissyboy]

What it looks like is immaterial in my world. The big question has to be whether or not it keeps your head warm.I have a winter hat with ear flaps that I love and I really don't care how it looks. When I have the flaps down, my ears are all toasty and warm and I can't hear anything that anyone may have to say about it.Like I'd care anyway.

 

[J-23]

Wanting to look your best isn't necessarily the same thing as wearing something simply because other people will approve of it. Wear whatever you want... If it's fashionable, it's fashionable and if it's not, it's not.

 

[NedNickerson]

Your profile says you're 19, so you've grown up and developed your own tastes.

The real test will come, though, when you buy your own shorts...

 

[gsdx]

At least she didn't suggest you tie your mittens to a long piece of yarn and thread them through the sleeves of your coat.

I'm with you, though. I'd never wear one of those toques you clasp beneath your chin. You can still pull the regular toques over your ears, and it's not like the darned thing is going to blow off your head.

A good toque is one of the most energy-efficient head coverings you can get.

 

[Nonimus]

At least she didn't suggest you tie your mittens to a long piece of yarn and thread them through the sleeves of your coat.

...................

 

[Swellegant]

Last weekend, the Grandmother and I were wandering around some department stores, not really looking for anything, just looking at stuff. In the menswear department, we got into a deeply philosophical discussion of the aesthetics of menswear and why people think her tastes are old-fashioned. And I explained that she just likes what she likes, and that's that... and I like what I like. Daddy likes what he likes (he's the person we were discussing most, as he has developed this fetish for wearing an oversized white dress shirt and black pants to church every Sunday, and we can't understand why he thinks he looks good in it).

Everybody has their own tastes, and their tastes are largely based on associations to other things that one likes. For example, Grandmother really likes checked shirts; I loathe them. They remind me of agrarian farmers and the conmformist fifties, two concepts that don't sit well with me. I like rich, sometimes brilliant colors, which to her look like calling undue attention to onesself, a great sin in her mind. Since I've gotten so big, I don't really like to call undue attention to myself, either, but I still like the colors and the patterns that draw the eye.

I of course consider my taste superior to hers, and she considers hers superior to mine (we almost came to blows over the most de-gorgeous apricot-and-teal necktie, which, though I couldn't really get away with wearing it, I thought was the prettiest necktie I'd ever seen); and we both consider our tastes better than Daddy's (he's the only person I know who has no taste... not bad taste, not questionable taste, just no taste, like the whole concept of aesthetics simply doesn't register).

Nevertheless (and why I was reminded of this episode by your story), Grandmother asked me pretty much the same question your mother asked you: what happened to you? We used to agree on so many things! It's part of the motherly mind to remember what you used to be like, and to be jarred and surprised by the fact that you've grown up.

Of course, I kind of agree with your Mom. Saskatoon in the winter is definitely an earlap situation. On the other hand, I wouldn't be caught dead in them either... I'd wear earmuffs. But I can't wear what you call a toque (what I would call a watch-cap, and which people have recently taken to calling beanies even though there is already a type of head-gear called a beanie which has nothing to do with this sort of hat), they look really funny on my head.

And yet another reason why I live in California. It never gets so cold that you have to wear a hat.

 

[gsdx]

...................

Oh, you have one of those moms, too?

 

[buzzj]

We always called those a sock cap.​

And we always called them stocking caps... maybe just a Southern thing. Post-OJ I've heard more people calling them "watch caps".

 

[Croynan]

Well I would say you are becoming your "own person." Thus many things are changing about and around you every day.

I think the most important thing for you to do, is to please yourself with what you feel most comfortable in and what you want to be seen it.

As for the big head, last time it was on display, it looked just fine. Of course you could be getting a "big head" from other things, but that is a different issue all together.

I hope grandmother is doing well today and that you had a chance to see her.

Remember everyone (including) is going through "A Period of Adjustment" ( play by Tennessee Williams) - now that you are on your own and away at university. All sorts of thoughts, and ideas are running around - as are memories. Be patient, and take it a little easier on yourself.

some simple advice from the simple lowly local village idiot who knows little to nothing.

eM.

 

[blackbeltninja]

Toque - from the picture, it's what we here in .za would call a beanie.

-d-